Talk to me about kissing

[Summerbreezer]

Ok, so it has been a fairly long time since I kissed someone so I may not be down with the current trends.

I met up at the weekend with a guy I really like. The date was nice, we had fun. Then he went in for the kiss and it was horrible! Firstly, the tongue went straight in on full spin cycle mode. I require warming up a bit, like a frozen microwave meal. I thought we would do no tongue for a bit, then bit of tongue, not full-on Hotpoint right from the starter's gun.

So I suppose my first question is - is this normal? Is he a bad kisser, or is that just par for the course these days? Second question - how do I get him to stop without making him feel awkward or uncomfortable?

I know that this makes me sound like I am 13 - I am actually in my 20's. Any help appreciated!

Looks like there are lots of bad kissing techniques out there! The OU should do a course or something.

The OU does, it's called summer residential school - most attendees graduate to advanced shagging within the week.

Oh god Gilbert that sounds hideous, I feel sick!

"Is he a bad kisser, or is that just par for the course these days?"
He's a bad kisser but it's subjective; he'd be the best kisser in the world if you loved that style. It's not all about tongue but too many men seem to think it is.

"Second question - how do I get him to stop without making him feel awkward or uncomfortable?"
What I do is hold the man's face and tell him that my lips are so much more erogenous than my tongue, so love to kiss with just lips first. Then when I'm warmed up a bit it's then OK to add a little tongue.
I think you just have to be clear like that; subtle hints don't work.

I think that, unfortunately, some men treat kissing as a "preview" of penetrative sex. They think if they shove their big meaty tongue in and out of your mouth it will get you all hot.

Not in a fucking million years.

You can train to a certain extent - everyone has their own preferences and sometimes it takes a few attempts to get the hang of a new person.

But you can't turn a sow's ear into a silk purse. Some people are just plain bad at kissing.

WIth the slobberers/tongue thrusters/open mouthers I just pull away from that kiss straight away. Then go back in more gently myself. Repeat a few times. If they don't twig by then, I give up.