loves me, doesn't find me "FWOARRR" any more...

[emzickle]

I was stupidly fishing for a nice comment the other day from DP - which resulted in him explaining that no, my new big curves are not what he likes... and if he liked "big" girls he would be going out with some one like X (one of my friends) and he would never of gone out with me.

To which I pointed out that I am about to have his baby in the next few weeks - which he replied "yes and Im grateful. I love you, I just dont think that your body is very fwooor... or what ever any more"

me left sitting in shell garrage mouth wide opened GOBSMACKED... then burst into tears whilst DP paid for petrol.

He says he loves me, just doesnt like my body.

So now I have this major horrible complex. I was 9 stone, im probably more like 13 1/2 now, I have stretch marks all over, and I feel like a big fat jelly moo... please make me not feel so horrid about my body. Ive started to get dressed in the bath room now, not infront of DP.

depressing me. thought pregnancy was supposed to bring people closer together. PIFFLE

ffs emzickle if he leaves you over a bet of excess weight after having carried and given birth to HIS baby ... he's not worth hanging on to!

As for loosing the weight... if you are doing it for YOU and NOT for him...

I've been told breastfeeding helps (didn't try that one myself).
Sensible diet (not starving yourself!)
Gentle excercise to start off with

I'm back at pre-pg weight now, 2 years on, without trying too hard. Only started working out recently to firm it all up as 2 pg's left me a bit too wobbly for my own liking.

i felt like shit being pg, was 7 and a half stone before and went up over 10 stone. But dh would never have said anything to me about it, where the f**k does your dh expect you to carry this baby, did he believe you would lay an egg and still regain your perfect figure ...what an arse.

If its any consolation you will get back to your pre-pg state, then you can dump him and find a man who loves you for you not the way you look

is your dh tom cruise??
what a t*t

Put powdered glusoce in all his dinners and see how he feels when you call him fat, lol.

emzickle,

What is your relationship like generally speaking?.

Is he always this thoughtless and do you have to fish a lot for any nice comments from him?.

What an absolute w*nker!

Constructively though, you can give yourself a boost with a beauty treatment like a contour wrap about 6 wks after birth (not sure whether this is compatible with BF). These have guaranteed inchloss and are like a detox. I'd get your DP to pay too.

Your next step is to choose a sensible diet, slimming world, weight watchers, GL etc - something that won't mean you're hungry and will still give you plenty of energy.

Then, give yourself TIME - I took about a year and a half to start feeling 'firm' again (then went and got pg!) - but honestly it's really individual. Realistically - your body's been through a lot making a baby and will go through even more when you give birth - be nice to it and forgive it for for not looking it's best for a while. God only knows what your 'loving' DP will say when he sees your tummy after - buy yourself some big nighties!

After writing this (and I do hope it helps) I really can't sign off without saying AGAIN what an a*se this guy is, there are some men out there who think pg is the time in a woman's life when she is the most sexy ever - quite sad really that your DP can't see it. I hope he goes bald soon so you can get revenge.

BASTARD!!!!

Reading all this with tears in my eyes. I cannot believe that people like him exist (well I can, but I don't want to iyswim).

I truly believe that a pregnant woman is one of the most beautiful things in the world.

I wish there was something more useful I can say

What a complete @rsehole!! If he can't differentiate between being fat & being pregnant then there's something amiss in his tiny little pea brain. I know some men go off their partners when they're pregnant but for crying out loud!
He sounds like an insensitive bloody teenager, not a dad-to-be

Insensitive prick...
When my dp was pressed (by me) on how he truly felt about my pregnant form, he said it was different, he felt less physical/sexy about me and more tender/affectionate. the love had not changed but the way he expresed it had.
Thre are ways of saying things...
Has he apologised or anything?

i see i have started some thing here.

he's not always like this, just recently, we've been stressed, lots going on etc, but never mind

christ almighty

can you start pointing out his personality flaws to him in front of a crowd and pointing out his dick seems to have shrunk

what a git

He is an idiot. I can understand men thinking it. God knows I didn't feel very sexy when I was about to pop, and I'm damn sure I didn't look it either. But to actually say it! No matter how hard you push, it is their job to make you feel fab. Piffle's dp at least expressed it nicely, but IMO this is a sentiment that should NEVER be expressed!!

And he's got you fretting about weight loss already. Really, I feel so cross for you.

Next time you're out with friends tell them about an imaginary mumsnetter who thought you could only get pregnant if the woman had an orgasm.
Then look at DP, laugh and say "Of course it's not true - or I'd NEVER have got pregnant, would I dear?"

I can only agree with absolutley everything that everyone has said.
What an absolute idiot

DH's response when pressed "You look tired" Not more or less attractive, just tired... he had a point

he sounds like a stupid tosser.
i'd be kicking him into touch i think.

pregnant women are beautiful by the way.ALL pregnant women.

Dont defend him for his nasty comments emzickle.....he may well have good points....(difficult to see what they might be at the moment, but...) he has been thoughtless, insensitive and a nob.

Alot of men find a pregnant body unattractive - thats not news....Alot of men find a pregnant body very attractive. They cant really help that. BUT they can help keep their mouth SHUT and say the right things at a time when you will be really sensitive about your size, and self image.

If you have been eating healthily throughout your pregnancy the weight will come off naturally in 4 to 6 weeks.

lol @ 'jumped up bitch tart'

Piffle is right. If pushed I would imagine a lot of blokes would admit to having mixed feelings about their pg partners. Insensitive he may have been, but try not to read to much into it.

x posts, vvvqv is right as well .

Are you planning to have him as a birth partner?

Yeah I am -

all these things said, I desperately love this man, and I cant wait to have our baby. I was just mortified when he said these things as I didnt expect them. I feel like I have let myself down really by being such a pig.

? you are pregnant

Yeah, 35 weeks

well stop reffering to yourself as a pig

oh