Feel really bad about this

[wellhellobeautiful]

First of all: my DP is amazing. Kind, gentle, supportive, funny, loving.

I'm on mat leave with our 5 month old DD, who's a really easy baby. I'm a bit tired and hormonal generally, but for the most part things have been plain sailing.

DP came home last night and I'd been really looking forward to seeing him. He was telling me about a conversation he'd just had with our neighbour about how much they were selling they house for. DP told me to guess the price and I was in the middle of feeding DD so just said any random number that came into my head without giving it much thought. So then DP jokingly said my guess was rubbish and to guess again and I just got this surge of anger and shouted 'just fucking tell me then! Stop asking me to guess! Fuck off!'.

I feel terrible. I love DP so much. Why did I shout at him like that? If he talked to me that way I'd think he was a massive wanker. I apologised straight away and keep apologising to him. He says it's fine but I can tell he's still hurt and disappointed with me. As I would be if it was the other way round.

We never shout at each other or swear at each other. I can't believe I've 'broken' that track record by being such a bitch.

Am I an abusive monster?

He would gladly have DD all day if I weren't EBF. As soon as she's weaned I wouldn't think twice about leaving her with him.

The thing is, he's so much more laid back/calmer/even tempered/rational than I am. Personally, I think he's a better person than me. So after a whole day with DD, he'd probably be irritatingly good natured and unruffled!!

(But the house would be a complete tip).

It's not my only worry in life rainbow.

I just don't have any threads running about them right now.

Thanks for the grip though. Sure you can spare it?

Take no notice of rainbowfeet OP. It's actually a legal requirement that someone says that on any thread that isn't life threatening. Like it's written into their MN membership contract or something.

Indeed she does, Bit, maybe nobody listens to her in RL so she has to finger-wag here. Perhaps MN could just put 'first world problem, get a grip' as a disclaimer in tiny typing, with a blanket banning of any poster who repeats it in any format and then we wouldn't have to read it in a thread?

It's all about context, innit, getthefeck. My XH told me to fuck off at our wedding reception. It mattered quite a bit more than being told to fuck off when I said Wolves wouldn't get promoted

Wellhello, it's really bloody amazing that you've managed a relationship, so far, without a single irritable snap-back! And with a new baby, too! [awestruck] I feel it will be helpful to relax your standards, just very slightly. Good relationships require situation-appropriate forgiveness, which you do actually seem to have. All that's left is to forgive yourself :) Buy him a Mars bar to compensate, if it makes you feel better.

OP Does he normally take a long time to get over a slip up or does it never normally happen?

Children learn by trial and error, you need to make sure he is prepared to cope with their inconsistencies as yours gets older.

He's over it unreal. I keep beating myself up because I feel like such a cow.

I hate being asked to guess how much, in the same way that it drives me nuts when dh asks me how much I want to spend on something. I'd rather have a look first and then work out what I can afford, or indeed it can be afforded at all.

Put it behind you, and if he does it again just say I don't know, tell me.

Lying I has sub-consciously skipped over the grippage and only notiiced it when the OP referenced it!

GarlicMayoniase can I just say that if you told me to fuck off when I said Wolves would get promoted, I would have left you there and then citing unreasonable behaviour

Come on OP. Unclench!