Meet the Other Phone. Only the apps you allow.

Meet the Other Phone.
Only the apps you allow.

Buy now

Please or to access all these features

Relationships

Mumsnet has not checked the qualifications of anyone posting here. If you need help urgently or expert advice, please see our domestic violence webguide and/or relationships webguide. Many Mumsnetters experiencing domestic abuse have found this thread helpful: Listen up, everybody

After being homeless for five months...

57 replies

FanFuckingTastic · 26/04/2014 02:15

I finally have a light at the end of the tunnel. It has taken me since 10:30 this morning to actually get excited about it, I was so stunned at how blooming great the offer from the council is.

I was in a complicated situation as I owed them money which I had began appealing when I was made homeless the first time (recharge fees for an old property, which were ridiculously high considering how well I cleaned it). Instead of being sensible and sorting it out, I ran away to live with my now ex, who told me it would be the best thing to do. I realise now I was being influenced by him into making poor decisions when my mental health was not good, I should have reported myself to my psychiatrist, and the council as homeless with two children, but instead I was stupid and ended up leaving my children with their father and running away.

I realised I was being abused in November last year when my stepdad died and he was trying to 'gaslight' me into believing that I'd said I hated him and would be glad when he was gone, I was absolutely horrified when I realised what he was and all the things he had done to me that weren't right.

I ran away just after Christmas, have been staying with various people since. I've felt like a burden and it's been such a nightmare, harassment from my ex, moving areas to feel safe, realising the extent of how much he had manipulated me using my disability and mental health to do so. I was really quite depressed.

Now, I think I might be able to relax for the first time as they have taken my homelessness application and agreed it was through no fault of my own due to fleeing DV, they had recognised that private sector renting is not sensible as my disabilities make finding the appropriate place highly improbable. The have put me into Band A category with highest bidding priority for six weeks, and will extend it if I don't get housed in that period. They've reduced the money I owe them by half, and loaned me the rest to be paid back at a low rate. They have accepted my assessment from OT and social worker to house me in level access ground floor accommodation, with storage for a mobility scooter, and either a level access shower or wet room. And they will do all the bidding for me, which saves me a great deal of stress and time. I walked out a bit stunned. I was expecting a no, or at the best help to get private rented housing. To know that I will finally be in a suitable home, and be able to sort out care packages and regain my independence again after the worst year of my life. My brain doesn't know whether to be happy or cry.

I just wanted to say that you can get free from an abusive relationship, I've had hurdles and hurdles due to my circumstances, but finally I can relax and know it shouldn't be too long before I am settled and can begin rebuilding my life. I have to own up to lots of mistakes and rebuild bridges, but I can do that now independently without anyone telling me what to do.

OP posts:
onlyjoking9329 · 10/05/2014 22:47

What Fanfuckingtastic news about your flat, you so deserve it.Thanks

FanFuckingTastic · 12/05/2014 19:22

Got my keys today, I have a lovely Housing Officer. She said to contact her if I'd like extra security in the house because of my circumstances. She was even annoyed that the flooring had been taken up as it would have made my life a bit easier, but everything I do have is lovely.

The bathroom is a lovely wet room with grab rails, there is so much storage space, I was really chuffed, three shelved cupboards and one of them is massive, the other two about wardrobe sized, one in the bedroom and one by the front door. The kitchen is bigger than I expected and looks brand new, and the shared garden has a lovely flower bed under my windows, so I can grow my own herbs again. Plus I got an outhouse for storage, which I didn't expect at all. I can even dry my washing outside on the line as there are two in the shared space.

The neighbours put the bins out for everyone, so I don't have to worry about forgetting or struggle with the heavy bins. I met the man next door, he's elderly and in a powerchair, so could tell me about how to store a mobility scooter safely, I have an anchor point on the wall to chain it up just in front of my flat.

I'm exhausted after a busy day and back at my mum's until I can get furniture into the flat, but I have KEYS! And a home.

OP posts:
cjelh · 12/05/2014 21:10

WOW WOW WOW!!!! I am so excited for you, it sounds great. How long may it take to get furniture?

GarlicMayHaveNamechanged · 12/05/2014 22:46

Oh, how fab :) What is it with the floors going missing in social housing? How do you put them back??

KiwiJude · 13/05/2014 08:29

Fab stuff, so happy for you! :)

FanFuckingTastic · 14/05/2014 00:35

I'll need to buy carpets, or try and find somewhere to help. Silly really as I've been left blinds in every window, carpets would have been nice too. It's some stupid policy they had. Even when it's decent flooring.

OP posts:
GarlicMayHaveNamechanged · 14/05/2014 02:14

Ah! I understand now! Thanks. If you can't get subsidised carpets somehow, do try local carpet shops for offcuts. It can be better to just have £14 pieces in the middles of the rooms for a while ... but they do actually have huge offcuts from large jobs. How's your pleading charm these days? Wink

New posts on this thread. Refresh page