does anybody else's partner/husband do this?

[desperateforaholiday]

I genuinely don't know if this is normal or not.

My dh very often will not respond when I say something to him, just incidental stuff like I spoke to my mum today or I saw 'insert any of my friends name here' today. Its like he doesn't hear what ive said. Usually when he says something to me, I'll say something along the lines of 'did you' or ' how are they'

It isn't just when I tell him ive seen or spoke to somebody either, if I say I'm going upstairs run a bath, I don't even get an 'ok' from him.

Is it me?, I find it a bit rude and a bit hurtful, as its like he's not interested and can't be bothered to speak to me.

Ive asked him about it before and he says that because I'm not asking a question he doesn't need to reply.

I do it with customers at work, I have to say. Probably more than to a dp/friend because I suppose I'm not really desperate for unnecessary conversation with strangers/people who aren't friends. I work in customer service, which is probably not ideal. I don't think people find me rude, though. Just a bit quiet. Maybe odd.

I do this when I am mumsnetting!
But he does it to me when I am talking to hi face to face. I'll get to the end of what I like to think is a witty/interesting anecdote and he will just stare blankly at me, as though he hasn't realised it's his turn to say respond. It's really fucking annoying.
However he does always wish me a nice bath when I say I'm going for one, and he is lovely in many ways so I try not to get too stressed about it.

My DH does this ALL.THE.TIME and it drives me crazy! I always say something to let the person talking to me know that I have at least heard and am paying attention. I find it really rude and know for a fact that he wouldn't do it to a colleague at work, so why to me??? GRRRR! Can you tell this bothers me

Sorry I should have said mine does it sometimes even when I'm asking a question! Grrrrrr!

I do not believe the possession of a penis results in the loss of the use of ones ears and tongue

...but inability to use the latter may result in removal of the bollocks! I used to be like this, but I've been retrained.

I'm with kmc1111. If someone wants to engage me in conversation then it's best they start one with me. Someone making random statements at me that don't have an "invitation" element just fly straight past me.

That said, I will (not always) say "oh" in a vaguely quizzical way but to me an evening of being at the receiving end of non-sequitur statements isn't proper interaction.

I can be like this. It is rude. DH picks me up on it and I say, 'oh yes, I was just thinking what to say'.

He's probably hoping he won't have to listen to whatever your mum or your friend said and what you discussed.
And if there is something interesting about them, he probably expects you to tell him all about it without having to ask questions.

It's rude and if you don't like it, tell him how you expect to be treated. I wouldn't put up with it from my DD and I wouldn't put up with it from anyone else. People will get away with treating you like that if you allow it to happen.

It's a man thing

This again, really?

It's not a 'man thing'. It's a rude person thing.

I can see that it is mildly irritating but then I am aware that a lot of what I might say to my DH (or he says to me) is pretty dull and boring and it is hard to think of the right response. My DH was telling me in incredible detail last night about some issue to do with his work, quite honestly it was mind numblingly boring and I was having to consciously think of phrases to respond with, whilst wishing I could just read my book .

Lol yes joysmum, life is as simple as pointing out people's faults to them and them immediately changing!

Lol ragwort I have that all the time and its usually a Friday night! When I used to give out about someone at work he'd say 'she's an idiot, don't talk to her'. I try the same but it doesn't work!

DP does this, but so do I sometimes. Not everything someone says requires a response.

Like, if he says "I'm just going to feed the cats/go the toilet" why would I need to respond to that? I'll answer him if he says "Did you want some tea/have you fed the cats?" but if it's just a statement I don't see the need to reply to it. Doesn't mean I'm not listening, just that I have nothing else to say to him.

Ok thanks everyone, lots of different opinions, I still think its rude though.

I'm going to do the same thing back, probably a bit petty but I want to see if he notices.

I do that to my DH.

It infuriates me when he talks for the sake of talking about inane stuff. 'I'm just going upstairs' is a statement not a question. Doesn't require a response.

'I spoke to Dave today' is a partial statement. Why should I need to interrogate him to get the rest of the story. Tell me or don't tell me. Don't berate me for not asking questions.

I know IABU when I do this, but above is how my mind works with this kind of thing!

I feel a bit sorry for my DH feeling so frustrated with me, and a bit sorry for you OP.

Just read the OP and my response to my DH. He is appalled at me (and at your DH OP) and completely agrees that it's a very very rude thing to do.

mine does it and i do it to him too, its the way things are in this house atm