Right what's the latest with online dating

[NewBeginningsSnoopy]

Ok had a break from it. Considering dipping toes back in. What sites are to be avoided? POF right? Is Match any better? The main question is: Do any decent men honestly do online dating??

I met my ex and my DP on POF. I never used to attract the freaks and weirdos, came across a few players but didn't really mind that.

Oh yes agree about avoiding those who launch into sex talk or try to send 'erotic' photos. I always avoided the guys who had semi nude/ bed shots etc in their profile. Thought it was creepy.

Agree with Hairy - don't invest too much. Something else I really liked about DP was he pretty quickly suggested that he called me, because there's only so much emailing you can do and it's better to find out quickly whether this person is right for you before you waste too much time.

I really respected his straightforward attitude it was only later I found out he's dyslexic and hated all the typing, and would spend ages checking his emails for typos and that's why he preferred calling

Also - profile pictures. I would avoid the ones that only have one picture, usually a selfie hastily taken.

Suggests they either a) don't have ANY pictures of themselves doing stuff in normal life, which is odd or b) married so all their normal pictures include their wife...

I liked the ones who had not only pics of themselves, but other pics e.g. of their dog, something to do with their hobby, pics of them doing stuff as well as the full face shot.

Ah it's just all so bizarre. I mean I don't even want a public photo of myself online fgs!

Right I've just done a tester profile on eharmony and they asked me for my phone number. This was dodgy and I couldn't complete the registration!

I don't imagine that they give out your number

Ok reg complete now. They gave me 8 matches. None of them have photos. It's all a bit stab in the dark. And they think I'll pay for this?!?

I have just signed up to pof today and chatted to two very decent seeming chaps. Neither one mentioned sex or sending photos. I might be meeting one for a drink and he seems really nice and we have lots in common. He is also fairly newly signed up though, perhaps he isn't jaded yet.

Really Liza? But you've seen a photo of them, right?

Yeah... I'm going to bed now and I've decided NOT to reenter the online dating world [shudder.] Thanks for posting. Do please post if you like. Will be continuing to look in real life. What is Meet Up like anyone ?

I'm older (50+) and won't be bothering with OD again - sometimes my resolve weakens and I look at the sites, but I'm reminded of the deafening silence - no response to messages sent to likely-looking chaps, messages received only from weirdos, general pointlessness - and remind myself that it's actually easier not to have a profile up and be hoping.....Good luck to you though, OP!

I'm not ready to date anyone at the moment but thought I would give eharmony a go in the spring. One question for the ladies who met DPs online, are your DPs local to you? How far afield did you search?

I think Online dating is similar in many ways to real life stuff, as people have said. If a bloke comes up to you in a bar or at a party and they start talking about sex, then you generally tell them to feck off. If they start undoing their zip, you call security.

If it's a reasonable, intelligent, amusing conversation though, you may be interested. The differences though are that people are more willing to mislead you because you don't have mutual friends to judge them for doing so, that you can't tell if there is physical attraction or something hugely offputting (or whether they're only 4'8) until you meet in person, and you're doing it alone, without some friends to protect you from the weird bloke or give you a sanity check on the guy you're chatting to.

Other than that, it's just the same, really. Arseholes, lovely people and lots of 'meh'

The Dating thread referred to earlier moves quickly because there are lots of people in similar situations, it's good to look at, at least, and offer advice if you have it.

Good luck

I found that I got absolutely zero responses on online dating - and yes, I messaged lots of people. Very hard on self-esteem, that .

I met my current partner on pof.
I had also signed up for match but found that a waste of time as it kept linking me to men who lived too far away and I had no intention of travelling far to get to know someone.

I chatted to lots of men on pof, some I knew would only be "friends". The ones who didn't float my boat, or gave any inclination of not being right for me I told them so.

I promised myself that I wouldn't lower my standards.
When I met my partner I was instantly attracted to him (we both were). The same as if I had met him in a bar, except through circumstances I never would have bumped into him in rl.

Who knows what the future will bring but I am glad that I tried on line dating.

I would also add be honest with what you are looking for and state that in your profile. If you don't want a one night stand then say so!!

I just popped on to pof because I was inspired by this thread and not been on in ages. Honestly, it's too depressing. Every single guy who has messages me or wants to meet me is, in my opinion, deeply unattractive. I'm no model and I'm by no means looking for perfection but I get so disheartened by the attention I get. I've been single for ten years. Maybe I'm too picky. Online dating isn't for everyone but I do have friends who have met their partners there. So it can work for some.

I discovered with pof you can decide who you receive mail from, so just filter out all the detritus. I don't know what is more depressing, people thinking they are too good or people thinking they aren't good enough and then going on to spend years on there own. People seldom look like they do in photos anyway. I am not photogenic but I have known people who are who look very plain in reality. But yes I have a photo of the two I am talking to.

I met my partner on POF.

I don't think that any site is better than another, you just get better at using it.

POF has the advantage that it has a lot of people on it, a lot of nice people, and a lot of fantasists etc.

The more detailed your profile, and what you are looking for, and the more detailed the prospective dates profile, the better. Also prepare some questions for the predating messaging.

It is a numbers game. The more people you approach, the better your chance of success. handled well, internet dating has distinct adavantages. You should know in advance the other parties likes, dislikes and aspirations, that gives you a big headstart.

I firstly went on POF at the end of September and in that time I've only chatted to 3 men. The first one had a hang up about women's dress sizes, the second although polite didn't have much chat but the third one, we chatted constantly, had lots in common and decided to meet up. OK we've only been seeing each other since the beginning of November, just once a week, but it's going in the right direction and we are starting to see each other more frequently. Perhaps I've just been lucky.

I don't know what meetup is but there are soanh chat social apps now for smartphones that most of my male and female friends have half a dozen or so on their smartphones and tablets.

They are used by genuine singles and marrieds looking to cheat alike.

Best thing to do is to join a club or flirt with that nice chap in supermarket aisle.

Soanh = so many

What are these chat social apps?

OP - As a fella who is on match and PoF, you get what you don't pay for with PoF. Lots of chavvy tattooed types and you will get bombarded with messages from people who aren't serious. As a decent guy (even if i say so myself) i don't bother sending messages on there as the good guys get muddled up with the crap. Match is fne but they do have alot of fake accounts that appear if your profile ever comes up for renewal and it still has a few dodgy people who can afford the 20/30 quid each month to ply their rubbish. Eharmony? Ridiculous and UI is a joke. Good luck anyway and don't let the fkers get you down whereever you go!