Embarrasing Problem regarding new boyfriend...

[WordsAreNoUseAtAll]

OK, I know this will sound trolly, so... nice ham, pombears, biscuits, LTB, etc etc

Right. I am halfway through divorcing stbxh for being all EA and twatty. I have a new boyfriend :-D He is lovely, funny, clever and a great dancer.

Also. He is very experienced and skillful in bed. I know I've been married for yonks (I was with stbxh for 7 years), and I'm only young still, but due to my attitude towards various forms of non monogamy, I'm relatively experienced myself. This man KNOWS what he is doing. He has a reputation.

My issue is... he is quite large. I only had xh for the last three or so years, and things got a bit married sex, so maybe I'm just dead inside.

He made me BLEED. He's filthy too (which I love) but that means that he, erm, hurts various parts. He is entirely willing to do whatever I ask (and anyway even if he wanted anything else, he is more than welcome to go and do it to some other poor young lady or gentleman) I don't want to just stick to boring positions due to said amazingness, but I also would like to not get injured.

What can I do? Is there some kind of...method? Or something?...

I've shagged about 50 people. This is a new issue.

He is very lovely and doesn't want to hurt me, but he also seems to find it all quite funny

I AM NOT A TROLL.

I do enjoy sex:) otherwise I wouldn't be doing it

How can you enjoy it if you bleed when you are being "manhandled"?

I used manhandled as a politer way of saying be thrown on the bed and going at it like rabbits haha.

sorry to cause confusion.

I thnk its clear she does enjoy it very much indeed, its fully consensual between them even if it isn't other posters' cup of tea, but there are aftereffects!

All I can suggest is what other posters have suggested like holstenlips. Get yourself checked out by a doctor. Maybe take it easy for a while to allow your bits to adapt and toughen up. If you walk much further than usual you get sore skin on your feet and maybe rub the skin off but your feet toughen up in time, maybe it's the same. Would the cap protect your cervix?

And go ahead and enjoy :)

Your cervix does not toughen up. Indeed it may be being damaged.

And Meerka, many women consent to things they don't really enjoy. It shouldn't be a case of, this is okay; but a case of, I really really like this.

It's probably a cervical erosion. Not romantic or sexy.

The only time I've bled from sex (with a large todger) is because the fucker gave me chlaymdia

Cervical erosion - although if he is bashing your cervix, it's more pinky discharge than blood usually. Are you sure it's not just chafing because you're a bit dry? (Perimenopause?)

If you are bleeding after sex, you need to see your GP ASAP for a referral for investigations.

Are you in date with your smear test? Do you have any other gynae symptoms? The common (almost invariably benign) reason is a cervical polyp, but there are other causes which need to be excluded.

grennie, the OP posted ohalf wayy down the first page that she really enjoyed the things they do, that's why she wants to carry on:

"But... he is genuinely amazing. He makes me feel things I've not felt before. He is perfectly willing to stop, or do things differently, but I don't want to. I ASK him to do the things he does"

I didnt know you could get cervical erosion, sounds awful :(

Those drugs are massively contraindicated. See your Doctor/ consultant.

What on earth does he have a reputation for?

Meerka, it's not quite what it sounds like.

It's usually caused by hormone changes ie taking the pill and is easily treated.

www.netdoctor.co.uk/ate/womenshealth/205939.html

Oh I see, thanks fireside.

Seen this issue from the other end, as it were (ladies) and a change to non-latex condoms makes a difference. Latex can, if you're insisting on ahem vigorous action, be a bit grippy no matter how lubricated you are. Resulting in small, somewhat stingy, tears.

Never has 6 inches sounded so good. Ow ow ow.

or the ph of 4.5?

I infer from your medication that you may be bipolar OP? You're taking medication for pain & bleeding... And have just come out of an abusive relationship...

Is this relationship a form of self harm? Do you perhaps believe that relationships/sexual relationships have to involve pain?

Either way, your partner is going hammer & tongs without consideration of the effects on you, quite the opposite of skilful.

Lamotrigine in combination with Lithium may be treatment for bipolar...

sorry, wrong thread. Forget any ph value.

I believe the OP has bipolar as does her new partner. I recall her, not long ago, mentioning her relationship with her DH in regards to phone sex and her hyper sexuality and boundaries. Seems she has split from her DH and is now with a new partner who has type II bipolar.

This is what I have read from the OP. I don't think she's in any position to enter a new relationship, open or not.

Maybe the Freedom Programme, that is run by Women's Aid, might be useful to attend?