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Mumsnet has not checked the qualifications of anyone posting here. If you need help urgently or expert advice, please see our domestic violence webguide and/or relationships webguide. Many Mumsnetters experiencing domestic abuse have found this thread helpful: Listen up, everybody

Original poster

I'm an idiot!

81 replies

Differentlyclued · 04/07/2006 10:49

Hi everyone,

This is my first post on mn and hoping for some help as I havent got newhere else to turn to.

So here it goes,

I met a guy over the net (not tht i went looking for romance over the net) and lied to him about something relitively important...
he found out somethin tht got him suspicious, but then i came clean with the guilt of it...

Now he is willing to forgive me for lieing but says hes gona torture me slowly! But doesnt want to finish things coz he loves me but he now doesnt trust me!

I dont know wht to do to make things upto him or if i should bother, as he is coming out with alot of snide comments, and he says hes not resentful jus disappointed?

Just like to know ne veiws.

Hope this makes some kind of sense... Thanx in advance.

OP posts:
yorkshirelass79 · 04/07/2006 13:52

Message withdrawn

Original poster
Differentlyclued · 04/07/2006 14:01

I have one ds who is 1.7mnths old.

OP posts:
saadia · 04/07/2006 14:12

I think that you have made a big mistake, as I think you already realise. I knew of someone who lied about their age to their fiance and on the wedding day, said fiance called it off when he found out. He wondered what else she had lied about and the trust was gone.

I think you should just tell this guy that you are very sorry you lied and would love it if he could get over it and never mention it again. Perhaps explain to him why you lied, because tbh if I was seeing someone who told such a major lie I would doubt their sincerity and their maturity.

But, nevertheless, just say that if he can't truly forgive you then perhaps you guys should take a break and then see what happens and if the relationship progresses.

Caligula · 04/07/2006 14:22

I hate the MN habit of crying troll at anyone unknown or a bit dubious, but I don't believe for a moment that you're a lawyer.

corblimeymadam · 04/07/2006 14:36

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HappyDaddy · 04/07/2006 14:38

belgianbun, there's a whole www of ladymen, too!

wannaBe1974 · 04/07/2006 14:42

agree with caligula.

corblimeymadam · 04/07/2006 14:49

This reply has been deleted

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Caligula · 04/07/2006 14:49

No it's not that I don't believe lawyers can screw up their relationships, it's just the style of writing.

wannaBe1974 · 04/07/2006 15:00

because the beauty of mn is that you can come on here and ask for advice in a totally anonomous way, but if you want people to take you seriously, then you have to be honest.

This poster has posted that she lied about her occupation to a man she met online, and yet people on here still think she is lying about her occupation, why would she need to do that?

There are a lot of people who come on here who bear their souls on here and who rely on mn for genuine support, and it's the ones that come on with apparently genuine problems but who seem too lie, potentially just for a laugh/reaction, that cause this culture of "every stranger is a troll".

corblimeymadam · 04/07/2006 15:06

This reply has been deleted

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Boxlady · 04/07/2006 16:38

this thread makes me laugh so much

as soon as someone comes on with some 'problem' you all immediately side with her, believe everything she says and decide the bloke's an arse

despite the fact that she's a liar

why do we think we have anything to offer this situation? this is the most two-dimensional situation I've ever read on mn

even if I believed a word of it there's nothing to go on

even Anna Raeburn would hold her hands up on this one

corblimeymadam · 04/07/2006 16:57

This reply has been deleted

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Boxlady · 04/07/2006 16:59

cos it amuses me

corblimeymadam · 04/07/2006 17:49

This reply has been deleted

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Bananaknickers · 04/07/2006 18:17

lawyers always tell the whole truth boxlady go and get yourself a coffee and calm down

Illbethejudge · 04/07/2006 18:40

But we all knwo that lawyer is sinonimous for lier.

FrannyandZooey · 04/07/2006 18:51

I think this thread has the highest proportion of badly spelt posts I have ever seen on MN.

Are half of the posters on this thread the same person changing names every 5 minutes or something? I don't recognise hardly any of the names. Very bizarre.

LadyTamba · 04/07/2006 18:52

oooooh Franny thats what I thought

FrannyandZooey · 04/07/2006 18:54

Is it just us Tamba? I don't usually hold with calling people trolls or being all suspicious the whole time, but there is something extremely odd about this thread.

That's not to say the OP isn't genuine, of course.

LadyTamba · 04/07/2006 18:55

I thought m4ya and 102002 were the same person. The spelling is too similar in alot of the posts.

I only notice cause I hate text speak though!

LadyTamba · 04/07/2006 18:56

boxlady is a regular with a name change, she said so on another thread

FrannyandZooey · 04/07/2006 18:58

Yes I did wonder if loads of regulars had been name changing for fun this afternoon while I was out.

But there is too much bad spelling / txt spk on this thread for them to all be individual posters IMO. Anyway, it doesn't really matter. Just curious if other people thought so too

SherlockLGJ · 04/07/2006 19:04

Snurk

VeniVidisco · 04/07/2006 19:14

LOL LGJ

So, just for clarity here. I hope people can bear with me in my ignorance. This poster says that she lied about her (alleged) profession because in the Asian community some deem it not appropriate for women to work.

Somehow though, in her infinite knowledge and wisdom, she thought it better to say that she was an (unmarried/married) mother?

Surely if a man was going to be funny about a woman who works, he might have a lot to say about an unmarried/single mother?

Or is it just me jumping to HUGE conclusions?

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