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Relationships

Mumsnet has not checked the qualifications of anyone posting here. If you need help urgently or expert advice, please see our domestic violence webguide and/or relationships webguide. Many Mumsnetters experiencing domestic abuse have found this thread helpful: Listen up, everybody

FEEL LIKE A HORRIBLE COW !!

68 replies

notnotnee · 21/10/2013 11:21

So, as you may know from previous posts, I have asked my husband to leave. We have been married 1 year, together 2 but things have not been good. Lazy, selfish, short tempered, controlling, always right, doesn't listen etc.
He finally left the weekend and I feel so sorry for him. He is devastated!! Completely broken. He has cried, written letters, pleaded with me to go to marriage guidance, lost his temper etc. To see any man like this is heartbreaking.
My question is........ should I give him another chance. This will be his 4th chance?

I do love him but I am being a realist and I kind of know, nothing will change. Am I right or wrong?

OP posts:
KouignAmann · 22/10/2013 11:54

He is 55 with a trail of failed relationships? He isn't going to change now is he? This is who he is!
He has far more to lose than you, which is why he is trying to wheedle his way back in again. You are still young at 48 and can recover and rebuild your life -without him. But next time run your intended past us because your Twatradar needs fixing. You can do so much better!

IWishYouWould · 22/10/2013 12:01

I have been in this situation. I would get desperate and make him leave. He begged, pleaded and came up with the sob stories. Literally as soon as he was back in the door, he reverted to the old beahiour. I even threw him out before Christmas once, it had got so bad. That time he found somewhere to stay. All it did was mean he 'lived' somewhere else, but spent all his time at mine. I wasted three years doing this. The final time, I decided to forget about his worries. I moved and got a very exciting life away from him. Of course he was upset, not because I left but I quote 'I can't believe you have the exciting life I wanted'. He said he ws going to move near me, but as that involved effort from himself, he stayed put and waited for his next mug. Bottom line, In his eyes I was there to provide for him. He didn't love me, or he would have worked at our relationship from the start. The best thing I ever did was leave him behind.
OP you have given not one, two, or even three chances but four. I would think if he hasn't changed before now, he won't. He doesn't believe you anyway, he left his stuff behind. I would bet he thinks this is just something you do now and then, but you always let him back. So has no need to change, does he? Honestly being on the other side and looking back is quite a relief. It depends how much of your life you want to let him have. Ask your self less abouy him and more about yourself. If he made you happy, which a partner should, you wouldn't be here.....again.Thanks

notnotnee · 22/10/2013 12:26

I know, pathetic

OP posts:
notnotnee · 22/10/2013 12:32

KouignAmann - Yes, he moved into my house, he is also a bankrupt. Gosh, I must have been an idiot. I feel such a fool. I would consider myself reasonably intelligent but, my goodness, I really did judge this wrong. Like they say, what doesn't kill you makes you stronger.

OP posts:
notnotnee · 22/10/2013 12:33

Iwishyouwould - Yes, the leaving his things behind is like suggesting he will be back soon. Well, guess what. He won't. I am done, I can now see what a gullible fool I have been. Thank you

OP posts:
notnotnee · 22/10/2013 12:35

KouignAmann - that made me laugh. I will in future. Thank you

OP posts:
notnotnee · 22/10/2013 12:40

NotSuchASmugMarriedNow - Feeling so much stronger and capable of a new future without him. Thank you

OP posts:
IWishYouWould · 22/10/2013 13:10

Im glad you're feeling stronger. Funnily enough I owned my house and he had massive money issues too. You can do so much better. Image all the time and effort you can now put into YOUR life and absolutely anything you want to.

IWishYouWould · 22/10/2013 13:11

*Imagine.oops.

notnotnee · 22/10/2013 13:15

Thank you again for the great advice.

OP posts:
diddl · 22/10/2013 13:35

He wants you back-but lost his temper??!!

Way to go there!

Nuff said for me tbh!

LeoandBoosmum · 22/10/2013 14:59

No problem, Pictish, we've all said thing in the heat of the moment...

notnotnee, Hmmm... your latest posts have put a different complexion on things. As you hadn't previously mentioned it, I'd assumed that there was no abuse, verbal or otherwise. Everyone has rows, but it is overstepping the mark to verbally abuse you, especially in front of the children - adult or not - and to destroy your wedding photographs. :(

I had, from what you'd described, thought he was probably young, naive and expecting you to pick up where his mum left off (in a way he is - he is emotionally immature!). The fact that he is 55 years old with a trail of unhappy failed relationships behind him alludes to his deeply entrenched views and negative patterns of behaviour. I don't think that means he can't change, but he at least has to recognise and acknowledge that change is necessary and be willing to do whatever it takes (which is likely to be counselling, since he can't do it alone). He may need to see some one alone, plus see a marriage counsellor separately with you if that is a route you want to take (it sounds like you want to throw the towel in right now, probably because, as you say, at 48 you are not getting any younger, and you are sad, angry and frustrated, justifiably so).

I do pity him, to be honest. He probably has a lot of scars from his childhood. He never knew the love or guidance of his parents. Children's homes, particularly in the past, were not always pleasant places. They were functional, big on discipline but not so big on 'care' and love. They were not the sort of places where you showed weakness. He probably learnt to become a 'man's man' at a very young age in order to survive. It's likely he is emotionally stunted, still the little boy whose parents abandoned him, with no real positive role models or examples of loving, stable, healthy relationships.

The chances are, whether or not he can discern any of this, he does not know how to change things. He has fallen into a pattern of self-destructive behaviour (that also hurts others), perhaps because he knows no better, perhaps as a defence mechanism. Consciously or subconsciously, he is pushing those who care about him away... It's actually pretty sad when you think about it, and maybe hard for you to get a deep insight into, particularly if you grew up with loving parents who nurtured you, taught you right from wrong in a balanced and loving way, positively shaped your view of the world and equipped you well for life. :(

People can say, for example, 'Four chances? Not on your nelly' or 'Yeah, well he's an adult now, time to start behaving like one' but it's not that black and white, is it? His past has blighted his life and he's tried and failed many times. His issues won't go away and happiness will elude him (and those around him) until he is able to see the damage he is doing to himself and his relationships with those he cares about, and seeks help.
(For him, seeking outside help would probably be an anathema to him. In his mind, counselling is likely to be something real men don't do!) If he were open to help, it probably still wouldn't be easy! The road ahead would probably be bumpy and painful at times, and he could sometimes take three steps forward and two steps back...

I'm reminded of that old joke, Q: 'How many psychiatrists does it take to change a light bulb? A: 'One, but the light bulb has got to want to change!' I think people can change but that's the key thing: they really have to want to!

In the end, I suppose the future of your marriage hinges on whether he is willing to get help (and, more importantly, whether you feel you want to take that road). I am guessing that you love him or you wouldn't have married him. I think I sense that deep down you really care about him and feel you could be happy together if he would get help.
(BTW, as an aside, I don't think the bankruptcy necessarily means he has used you; it's more likely that it's just another manifestation of his self-destructive behaviour.)
Or, perhaps you feel you rushed into things by marrying him and genuinely made a mistake, in which case it would be sensible to bail.

It's really up to you whether you want to commit more time to the marriage and make the emotional investment (if he wants to work on the marriage...with professional help). If he is totally resistant to getting help then you're basically on a hiding to nothing, and should end the marriage, sad as it is. We all make mistakes and errors of judgement. You would only be failing yourself and him if you carried on in a marriage you don't feel you really want to be in. I think you have to search your heart and ask yourself what you really want, and take it from there.

If you love him and want to try to work on the marriage, I think it would be helpful to ask your husband if he wants to get help to make things work (do your homework as not all counsellors are equal. And, as I said, independent counselling, maybe for both of you, would perhaps be helpful?) I would tell him that you love him, that you understand he had a difficult childhood that has negatively impacted his life, but that if he stands any chance of happiness with you (or at all) for what remains of his life, then he must confront his demons. He is an adult now...he does not have to be a prisoner to his past! You love him but you can't continue as it is...and these are not problems he can fix with a self-help book from Amazon!

Maybe you should write him a letter? That way it doesn't degenerate into an angry slanging match - where cruel things are said in the heat of the moment - and nothing is achieved except more hurt and damage! A letter helps you to get down how you really feel and what you want to happen - in a less angry way - and gives him the chance to read, re-read, absorb and consider.

If you want to work on the marriage, I would tell him how you feel, what you want to happen - in a letter or otherwise - then suggest that you have a month apart (no contact at all) to defuse the situation a little and to give you both a chance to really assess what you both want.

I don't want to sound like an armchair psychologist; I actually think much of the above is common sense.

I really do hope you and he can find happiness, whether that is together or separately.

Keep your chin up and keep us posted. Hugs, LeoandBoosMum

MissStrawberry · 22/10/2013 15:18

48? Shock I am really sorry but I thought you were very young. You are grown up and it is time you believed it.

Pack up his stuff into bin bags then text and say all the stuff will be on your drive at 5pm and if he doesn't come and get it it will all go in the bin.

He expects you to run around after him and look after him. Don't. You are not his mum and at his age if he can't look after himself why the hell should you.

notnotnee · 22/10/2013 17:21

MissStrawberry - I would try that but I think he would turn nasty if I humiliated him in any way. This is a man that gets very angry very easily. Not sure what the best suggestion is with his remaining belongings??

OP posts:
LeoandBoosmum · 22/10/2013 18:40

notnotnee...
I replied to you by PM. Do nothing tonight. Sleep on it and look at everything tomorrow through a fresh pair of eyes.
hugs to you

BrunelsBigHat · 22/10/2013 18:47

Sorry OP, my point was not to put your life on hold.

Send the bugger packing

Tell him if he thinks he can change to do so well away from you. In the meantime you get on with life, have fun and generally enjoy not being round such a nobber.

You should probably hold off dating seriously for a year or so in any case just to reset your tolerance for twattish behaviour. ( ie zero) so by the time you are ready once more for a serious relationship he should be all mended!

Not.

But the point being he should absolutely NOT be attempting this magical transformation anywhere near you.

Stealmysunshine · 22/10/2013 19:16

When I first read your post I thought being married a year is not long enough to walk away and was ready to advise you to try again.

However, reading further I think you should walk away. You are grown enough to know what you want in life and you should not tolerate his behaviour. I don't mean to be rude but did he really not show any of this behaviour while you were dating? I'd find it hard to believe everything was perfect before you got married then it somehow changed? You may have thought at the back of your mind that he'll treat you with more respect once you are married? But that clearly isn't the case.

I empathise that he's had a tough life but you shouldn't get the brunt of his anger. It's best for him to be single sort his shit out, go to counselling and deal with it, it may also help his relationship with his daughter?

Stay friends with him and you may see a change in a few years and decide to try again, but for now get rid.

MissStrawberry · 22/10/2013 19:40

Don't you see that not doing something because he will kick off is an example of his bullying and controlling personality?

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