Odd behaviour from DP or am I paranoid.

[Redskys]

I will try and keep this as brief as possible. I have been with DP for nearly 7 years.Majority of the time a good happy relationship. Only problem is an old female married friend, who has a history of extra marital affairs. I have tried to remain calm about their friendship which is not close, just the occasional call and text, as far as I know. But my DP keeps his mobile almost glued to him. But have managed a few sneaky checks of it. But have become very suspicious of change of contact name to a mans name. Also missing unexplained hours which unfortunately he can excuse through work. Sorry to rabble on. This woman's husband died quite recently after a long illness. I expected DP to attend the funeral today because he knew him as well. Mostly through my unease of the situation I offered to accompany him, I also knew him as an acquaintance. But DP seemed alarmed at my suggestion and has said he's not going. This strikes me as very odd. I am trying to keep logical but finding this behaviour out of character.

What will happen if he calls on the new phone from Pay as you go? Of course you could text him back asking to text you instead because you are somewhere (e.g. theatre, hospital etc). He might get suspicious as you do not know what is their communication preference. If he texts you then you will see what to answer. You might even arrange a date. Make sure your phone is on silence and you do not call him any pet names. There is a warning, however, that he might know her number by heart. I have friends who are very good with mobile phone numbers. He might recognise the first three numbers or that there is no double numbers.

What if you invite her home for a drink? Just a kind gesture. Then hide a recorder in the kitchen cupboard or under the sofa and leave to the bathroom for 5 - 10 min. You just need a voice recorder which does not beeps etc. There are voice recorders which can last for a few hours. Sure she will not stay that long.

So get a voice recorder from Argos and tell him it would be nice if she came over for a drink. Show him you feel sorry for her etc.
I think it should work unless he says "no way".

Morning How are you OP?x

Thanks for all of your replies, its lovely to have so much support. I am ok most of the time. I am just getting on with things. I would say most of the time we get on well. Although he has always lived to work, working mad hours, which is the main thing we argue about. Its so difficult to have quality time together and make some time for some loving. But we do try to have 1 night out a week and occasionally the odd weekend away. We both tend to relax then, away from the hectic work life balance. I always thought he was happy with our relationship. But I think a lot of men are tempted to stray when things are a little bit tough, and there's an attractive women with open arms without any domestic boredom getting in the way. But I am watching and gathering any evidence. Like a lot of women I am more tuned into signs and odd behaviour/body language than he would ever realise.

Could you follow her, if you know where she lives.

I think when you know, you know.