I've been drinking too much for 20 yrs. I'm late thirties now. Mainly binge drinking, work hard play hard.
I started drinking most days about 5 years ago. Anywhere between a bottle of wine and ten pints, depending on the day of the week . It quickly made me ill; elevated lfts, gastric ulcers and chronic diarrhoea .
This made me moderate my drinking and I thought that it was under control. Drank at most a couple of times a week. Rarely got drunk, 6 pints in a night happened only once in a while. Holidays were a bit of an undoing, drinking every day for a week, up to a couple of bottles of wine ( usually just one ).
I was hospitalised twice the week following holidays. Both times following a few days abstinence. Vague symptoms, feeling awful, hi pulse, 'shocky', abdominal pain, diarrhoea. Appendicitis and pancreatitis were suspected , discharged with no treatment or diagnosis.
Since then, I haven't drunk much. I've had months of total abstinence, and a few low grade benders (6 pints). However, I've noticed if I drink too much, bottle of wine, or drink a couple of glasses a couple of nights running then I suffer tremendous anxiety, sweats, diarrhoea and abdominal pain.
It came to a head recently, following a frantically busy work and family time, following a weeks holiday.
I drank a bottle of wine every day for a week. Then stopped ready for work. Bottom fell out of my world. Awful anxiety, sweats, shakes, diarrhoea, abdominal pain. This progressed to being ultra sensitive to repetitive noises (the kettle, washing machine, alarms). My ears were literally twitching. I had subtle disturbances of vision, mistaking simple objects on the periphery of my vision for something else.i kept working.
The following weekend, I drank a bottle and a half of wine on the Saturday, 2 glasses Sunday and Monday. Que a slightly milder version of the above.
I now haven't had a Drink for nearly 2 weeks. I feel better.
I am sure that I suffer from kindling. I think both hospitalisations were moderate withdrawals, and that I've suffered minor - moderate withdrawals on many other occasions. I've clearly wired up the circuits that lead to convulsions, and have come to the conclusion that I run the risk of death if I drink again. All this is without any real medical input, although I have phoned my gp, explained the above, and gp agrees.
I think I'm fairly lucky, as I have taught myself, over the last few years, to enjoy nights out without drinking, Christmas etc. However, it is clear that moderation , and periods of sobriety are not enough, I must stop completely,
All thoughts gratefully received .
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