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Letting my partner sleep with other women

2 replies

Wanttopatchitup · 12/08/2013 13:38

Hi All,

I know you will all think i am mad and a pushover but i wanted some honest opnions on something i have thinking about for sometime.

My husband of 12 years left me two years ago for another woman, i was broken, i did and continue to, really love him, he is my soulmate in everyway.

Although i know what he did was wrong, i do understand it as we very rarely had sex and i have allowed myself to become overweight, he isnt attracted to overweight women and so it caused a problem. I look very different now to how we first met he was very attracted to me intinally and our sex life was great.

I think also he struggles with no variety, i really think he would enjoy sex with another woman, but me as the love of his life, recently we have become close again and he wants us to get back together.

Im thinking of suggesting to him that we have regular threesomes (twice a month maybe) to stop him from looking elsewhere for sex and to reignite our sex life. i know this sound strange, but i would rather him to have sex with other women that i know about than he do it behind my back.

I think this would keep him satifised long term, if we had changed partner every so often to keep it interesting. Reflecting on my own behaviour in our realtionship, i do feel like in was partly to blame for his affair and want to make this work so much, as i adore him.

i suggested something similar a few weeks ago and he seemed very happy with the suggestion and felt that it would improve our marriage, he said that this is what every man dreams of, a loving wife who allows her man to explore sex with other women, without becoming jealous. he says that no love of affection would be involved for the other partner, just sex.

When he puts it like that it sounds like a sensible and forward thinking agruement- is it unfair of me to expect a young virile man like him to be faithful to me alone? and why should i be threathened by the fact that he wants to sleep with other women, he is a man and it is his biology.

Has anyone else tried something similar- did it work- or was it a disaster?? Im 36 he is 38 and we have no children, I wouldnt sleep with other men, it would just be women we would share our bed with............

KateSMumsnet · 12/08/2013 14:45

AHEM - a reminder of our rules about troll hunting.

KateSMumsnet · 12/08/2013 15:06

Also, the OP has been around for a while, and is a NCer Smile

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