name calling during argument

[bugley]

This hasn't happened for ages but i was interested to know other people's opinions on the subject. During bab arguments do you call dh, or does he ever call you insulting names(eg, bstard, btch, etc)? me and dh are very careful to control our language during arguments now because of the hurt that calling eachother horrible names causes

I don't ever namecall anyone. Ever. And I would not tolerate anyone namecalling me.

(I do distinguish between saying "you are a bitch" and "don't bitch about that", iyswim.)

I don't think we tend to use bad language in arguments anyway? Been ages since we had an actual out and out argument, anyway.

Me and DP use "Bitch" as a term of endearment.....

Ha.. I have called him all the things under the sun in the past.. and as for ex.H....!!!

DH has called me a bitch before... but only when I have really deserved it.

Am interested to see whether the bulk of MNers allegedly never call or get called anything by/with other halves during an argument.. and whether these are the same people who have never given their child a Fruit Shoot...

It's almost enough to drive me onto the Bad Mother's club for good....

I should point out though, we dont name call during an argument. Its unnecessary, unproductive and just plain hurtful.

I guess it depends on the nature of the argument though. There are arguments/disagreements, and there are the verbal lashing out frustrated arguments.

yes agree that "you btch" is nothing like saying "btching about something"

[oh yes, DH calls me a "dirty bitch" but in an entirely different context.... ]

What about telling eachtother to f**k off, when really angry!?

surely some of you tell dh to "f**k off sometimes or get the same said to you?

I don't, although it's not the same as namecalling, imo.

I don't think there's anything wrong with whatever people choose to do in their arguments. Personally, there are a lot of things I wouldn't tolerate, and angry swearing is one of them. But I'm sure there's loads of stuff I do and tolerate that other people don't.

am i wierd because i have never rowed with DP?

We call eachother shit neck etc a lot tho

I use the f word a lot, in ordinary conversation I have to admit, and I heard my ds use it the other day in ordinary conversation. It doesn't really bother me, I have to say. But then, he loves fruit shoots and I buy them for him so I suppose there is no hope for me.

PMSL I will be really honest the last thing i said to DH this morning at 4.30am when he put the bedroom light on was 'why do you have to be such a selfish B***d'. He didn't bat an eyelid and just mumbled sorry.

I know its not very proper but we do call each other during arguements but to be really honest we do do it when joking aswell.. DD is only 6 months so I know we will have to modify our language when she can understand.

dp uses 'bitch' as a term of endearment to me, only rarely uses it in an argument if its deserved.

I call him a 'fcking bstard all time when we're arguing. He deserves it. He acts like a twt most of the time

I use 'tosser', 'wanker' and 'fuckwit' - oh and have reintroduced 'gobshite' into the Feisty household.

But, neither of us ever sulks, have never gone more than a couple of hours without 1 of us rolling over (so to speak). Not into silence, just big outbursts of temper and back to normal again.

Same here Fesitybird!

Dumbledorsgirl - you have genuinely surprised me! I never thought of you as someone who used 'the f word' - isn't it strange, the online perception you get of people?!!

shafter

Affectionately call dh a stupid tart on occasions. Or you stoopid fucking arsehole cuntface twat - I especially like that one.

Told him to fuck off in an argument once and felt really bad about it. Don't tend to swear in anger much unless it's about other people and down the pub. Have to be careful what the kids overhear you know.

I particularly like the curse my DP uses everytime he stubs his toe....."cock suck fuck bitch"

Im not entirely sure why that combination, but hey ho.....

Gwen - that sounds entirely reasonable frtom your dh. Might use that one meself.

not now but when i was younger and with ds's dad we would really go for it. he once called me a whore (amongst other things) and i punched him in the mouth. not nice, not proud, but ten years ago. ive never done anything like that before or since. (that guy knew how to wind me up but strangely we are very good friends now!). i dont like name calling, at all. i cant even stand confrontation of any kind. ive never been one to have a good row, i would much rather talk it out.

A few years ago during horrendouse row, i told dh that i found him physically repulsive and couldn't beat the thought of him near me, then he called me a cold frigid cow. those words were like a punch in the face (althought i'm sure i'd have actually left him if he'd done that) but i (sort of) forgave him eventually becuase of the things i was saying to him - probably deserved it. thankfully we're never that horrible to eachother now. sometimes shout and sulk but but no name calling

should have been "bear" not "beat"!

Name calling in the Wishful household is used in jest only - the dirtier and more foul the better ; DH and I think it's hilarious. I will pass on Gwen's DP's curse to DH with interest.