Oh dear Stbex has his first childcare issue lol

[Mosman]

He thinks having just got back from 2 weeks away training muggins here is going to have another week of straight 24/7 on my own with four kids.
I've told him just that he has to do 50% of their washing, 50% of the cooking, cleaning, tidying, getting them ready for school and no I can't have them for 5 days straight.

I'm quite enjoying giving him a taste of the problems he'll be facing from here onwards.

Where are you living Mosman?

Nedlands in Perth :-)

Will you be able to support you and the children on your salary alone? If you can, from what you're saying, it really sounds like you'll be better off ditching your man sooner rather than later, even if it is solely for the sake of your mental health. I know you don't want him to get off "scot free" but there comes a time where you need to just let go for your own sanity. After all, what could be a better fuck you than you thriving?

No, not a chance and I wouldn't stay here if it was a case of completely alone, 4 kids and one salary. I am just not going have their standard of living compromised by that fucker.
When he wasn't working he happily allowed me to keep things afloat, used our eldests savings to cover school fees, has used up both his parents savings to buy a fucking mini car - as a father of four - then exchanged it for "shares" jack in the beanstalk magic beans more like
Seriously he fucking owes me big time lol

I had to live with my h after we split up - he wouldn't move out... It was absolutely awful and my well being suffered hugely. So my heart goes out to you, it's so bloody miserable

Thank you ... It's all come to a head tonight and blown up again. I've said no more I'm coming back to the UK

I'm sorry to hear that Mosman. Is going back to the UK what you want?

I think you'd be better off with half the globe between you, if that's a possibility.

I don't really want to go back but the truth is I cannot rely on the man so I need to be secure with the kids and not knowing where we will be living every year and not knowing if he will hold on to a job is what has caused half of this stress over the past five years. I have to put the kids first and depend on nobody but myself.

Tough choices Mosman, sometimes the right decision can feel very hard to make.

I find my life now h isn't around is alot calmer, easier and less about saving family from one catastrophe after another - I've just been plunged back into it this week (form filling hell with him) and it's reminded me how awful it was trying to involve him whilst limiting his damage...

I can sympathise with you there in that last paragraph DoubleLife. Even now, at some remove, I still live with some dread (but nothing like what life was like when it was all up close and personal all the time).

but doing him any favours ? No chance

I get that you need this to work, but you do realise that it is your children who will suffer, don't you? They are right in the middle & watching him fail is watching your children being failed.

You're right, I've calmed down a bit it was just the bloody assumption that I would have his back still even though I will see none of the benefits of this glittering career he's suddenly going to forge for himself.
Anyway I've got the financial settlement nearly agreed and the better he does the better they do so all good.
I'm still going to be the uk by Christmas though I'm completely over the uphill struggle.

Has he agreed you can take the dcs back to the UK? These things can get tricky when you're in another country, as I'm sure you're aware.

Sounds awful

Yes he's fine about it, which says all you need to know about the man

You are doing well not to have buried him under the patio a very long time ago - hang in there, not long now x