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Mumsnet has not checked the qualifications of anyone posting here. If you need help urgently or expert advice, please see our domestic violence webguide and/or relationships webguide. Many Mumsnetters experiencing domestic abuse have found this thread helpful: Listen up, everybody

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Mumsnet has not checked the qualifications of anyone posting here. If you need help urgently or expert advice, please see our domestic violence webguide and/or relationships webguide. Many Mumsnetters experiencing domestic abuse have found this thread helpful: Listen up, everybody

Relationships

Asked Flirty Guy Out; Now Being Blanked

108 replies

Zilvernblue · 21/05/2013 09:58

My marriage ended a couple of years ago and I've always had a bit of a thing for this guy in my friendship group. I knew him before I got married and we went on some casual dates but never quite managed to get it together, although he's admitted he fancies me. He's very shy, and has never had a girlfriend at 33. But very flirty, quite attention seeking, but kind of sweet and good to talk to too. We all went on holiday together as part of a group last year and got on amazingly well. Things felt "special".

So the flirting was happening again, but no suggestion of a date. Mutual male friends were telling me he was keen but he's "shy", so I decided to ask him out. I'm not brave enough to do it in person, so I sent him a text, not too pushy but clear that we should give it a go.

No reply. This was 4 months ago. Since then, he has avoided me like the plague. I would say he is actually going out of his way to avoid me - theres been a couple of parties where he's turned up early for half an hour, seen me in the distance and left without saying anything. I've noticed I'm no longer being invited out to drinks by several of the mutual friends, just at a time (separated from DH and getting divorced) that I could have done with friends.

I'm sure he is doing this to avoid saying "no" and because he probably wants to flirt with me in the future without having to date me, but in actual fact I'm mortified, embarrassed and really hurt by it all.

So has anyone ever encountered one of these "flirty but nice" men who don't want anything else, and how did you deal with them? Because I'm pretty sure that once he's made his point, he will try to go back to the flirty stuff.

OP posts:

Report

AnyFucker · 21/05/2013 20:33

ska read this thread

as well as being a hilarious read and give you some pointers as to what not to do, there is reference to "feathery stroking" which should tell you what you need to know

KatieScarlett2833 · 21/05/2013 20:34

For feathery stroker, google Marian Keyes and don't ever think it is a good idea.

AnyFucker · 21/05/2013 20:34

lou...perhaps your little brother could tag along with you too ?

Loulybelle · 21/05/2013 20:34

No little brother, but i have a little sister, will that do?

AnyFucker · 21/05/2013 20:42

perfect !

skaboy · 21/05/2013 20:44

Ok, so no feathery stroking, no cock pics And no younger siblings. Think I can do all that. Right its a date then. (Fixes bike puncture and scrabbles around for money for the fish and chips)

Loulybelle · 21/05/2013 20:53

and money for a bread roll and drink, dont be tight now Skaboy.

KatieScarlett2833 · 21/05/2013 20:54

And no onion rings unless you've gold spot in your pocket.

fanjoforthemammaries7850 · 21/05/2013 20:57

I wish I had an exciting secret life I tell ya

skaboy · 21/05/2013 21:02

That's fine Loulybelle. Might get you some haribos as well for afters

Loulybelle · 21/05/2013 21:05

Fizzy cola bottles Skaboy, i need my fizzies.

skaboy · 21/05/2013 21:10

Ok, that's a deal. (You've cleaned me out now btw)

Loulybelle · 21/05/2013 21:10

Never said i was a cheap date Skaboy

ProphetOfDoom · 21/05/2013 21:14

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

AnyFucker · 21/05/2013 21:16

have you two spoken on the wireless telephone ?

Loulybelle · 21/05/2013 21:17

Im from Essex Matilda, might be a little too far.

skaboy · 21/05/2013 21:21

Yeah I live oop north (lancashire)...so its all over unless you want some kind of long distance thingy. (Goes to room and plays music loud)

Loulybelle · 21/05/2013 21:23

last guy was from lincs and before that Yorkshire.

Should really stop flirting with Male Mumsnetters.

AnyFucker · 21/05/2013 21:33

erk, that's quite a distance if the spondoolies are a bit tight

I could offer you my front room in Manchester ? I have a wide screen telly, a squashy sofa and some bowls to put the Haribo in and a washing machine to launder the sex towels

skaboy · 21/05/2013 21:33

Haha... its all good. I get to travel quite a bit for work so if I ever go to essex (note to self-find out where essex is) I'll bring my bike and wages from saturday job...and fizzers.

AnyFucker · 21/05/2013 21:33

I could put some plastic sheeting down on the carpet

oh, and Sky movies

AnyFucker · 21/05/2013 21:34

< starts drilling hole through wall from sitting room >

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Loulybelle · 21/05/2013 21:35

Skaboy, you have offended me, dont even know where Essex is.

Its all about Essixxxxx, like totes babe.

Shut uppppp!!!!

skaboy · 21/05/2013 21:49

Look, I do know its darn sarf...and your on the telly an all that...

Guess we'll just have to be pen pals :(

KatieScarlett2833 · 21/05/2013 21:52

Get a day return to tanland skag. Man up.

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