What was/is your life like at 25?

[FennCara]

Mine is not what I expected.

I'm expecting my third child. I'm facing a messy divorce. I have no career, but have a degree. My parents aren't in great health.

I have lovely friends, a nice place to live. I'm definitely lucky in that sense.

But this isn't how i saw it.

I'm 25 now, married with 3 kids, own business and new house! Not where I expected to be at 25 but happy with my little lot!

I had graduated and done the professional skills course needed for my profession. I was living and working in Brussels, having a great time (moved back when I was 25). I was dating a (with hindsight) somewhat twatty Italian guy, earning my first every half decent salary, and had a lovely little one bed flat near the European Parliament. It was a great time. Mortgages and proper responsibility came later!

I am 25 soon

I've been divorced 4 years (married at 18, split at 21)
Have 5 yr old DS, me and XH have joint custody and a good co parenting relationship. Live in a bungalow owned by my parents that I am about to buy into and extend. Have just applied for a new job and evening class which is exciting. Have good friends. Just need to expand my social circle a bit.

But last year I lost a baby then nearly died from complications. The relationship I was in ended right after I came out of hospital. Looking back he was extremely EA so glad he's gone. But I'm still coming to terms with losing the baby as it was very much wanted. I'm in therapy for it and its getting better, and after having long term serious relationships from age 16 I'm enjoying the time alone with DS and to find out about me. But Wether i will find the right person and have more children is a worry for me.

Married and up to my neck in nappies and cash in hand part time jobs. 2 DCs and 1 on the way.

My 30s have been a blast though OP! Don't despair :)

Just met DH,
I had bought my own house a year before.
I was working part time but on good money.
I was clubbing 2 nights a week
My social life was great.
I was fitness mad
I loved going to gigs and the theatre and art house cinema.
I didn't want children.
Life was good.

22 years later I have 2 teenagers, I'm still with DH,my old house got knocked down as part of a regeneration plan but we had moved from the area years previous.
I'm still into my fitness,gigs, theatre and cinema,
I still largely have the same circle of friends.
I'm still happy.

My life at 25 was just fantastic. I had just qualified, had a super job, a nice DP, no kids yet, masses of exotic holidays and went out every night (for socialising and a wide range of activities) and away every weekend. We owned a lovely big house with a lovely big garden that we enjoyed furnishing.

The next 20 years were, however, pretty well all downhill. Most of it is not remotely enviable and I don't want to tell you the sort of place I am in now.

We all go through ups and downs at different stages in our lives. The thing is, not to be disappointed with yourself and to keep on carrying on :)

I had just split up with a partner who was nice enough but terribly dull, was anorexic and mentally a complete mess and it took me years to figure out why, skint and doing a stressful and unrewarding job, had just arrived in London and knew no-one and was in no position to be building friendships let alone relationships because my mind was all over the place. I used to live continually thinking "if I can just get through the next five minutes". Things got worse before they got better. Think I was living in a perpetual state of mental breakdown for a few years after that.

Feel like it's all a distant memory now - I am so fortunate now and count my blessings every day. Some people's lives stay fairly constant and others' change beyond recognition - I'm in the latter group.

Was single, lived at home and worked full time in a job I had a like/hate relationship with (both due to nature of job and a very difficult to work with colleague). Felt awfully lonely and could have really done with someone to talk to.

1992 was the tail end of two very bad years for me personally speaking and my grandparents both died within a few months of each other. My Dad had been made redundant for now the second time and at one time I was the sole breadwinner.

Life did change for the better eventually; difficult work colleague left (yay!!) so job became much better, my Dad found another job and I met my DH a year later!.

I had just finished renovating my 1st house, thought never again! Was in a lovely job, was with a fab guy we were having the best time, throwing parties at ours, out every weekend amazing holidays, money to burn but also found I had fertility issues. Only 3yrs later sold house bought dream project house (all finished now) still with same guy, have no money to burn, holidaying in this country for only 4nights but have a little baby girl! I enjoyed then but love now!!

Oh dear, I hope things look up for you, OP

When I was 25 I was travelling around Australia for a year.

I was married had a baby, a major nervous breakdown. And left my abusive husband :-)

I am 25 now.

2 kids to two different men. My ex (and DD1s dad) was abusive. I have quite a lot of debt from that relationship.

I have no qualifications except GCSEs despite being "brainy" in the eyes of my family. So I feel like a failure. I havent worked for 5 years so career wise I feel theres no hope.

I have a lovely DP though. And after a really terrible year filled with homelessness, no money etc we are finally getting back on our feet.

I'd been married 2 years, and had just had my first child. 20 years down the line I've got 3 DCs from first marriage, got divorced, met current DH of 14 years and have another 2 DCs.

My 20s were shit - my 30s were good - and my 40s are fucking excellent (mostly) if that gives you hope for the future!

I am 25 now and totally not living the fairy tale existence that I had always just assumed that I would have as I was growing up.

Divorced, single parent, XH who doesn't have any contact with (or pay maintenance towards) 1 year old DS. I spend my time working long hours in work knackered, or at home with baby knackered.

On the plus side, I have my degree, good job, own house. I'm doing it on my own! And I am no longer married to a prize twat.

Great year being 25, met dh, moved in with him after three months, had a gorgeous flat in a great area of London, was young enough to really enjoy living and working in London, carefree, no kids.
Well paid job.

Fast forward 27 years of ups and downs, and we now have two grown up kids who have flown the coup, are mortgage and debt free, so in some ways have come full circle!

I wasn't in the best place when I was 25. The month before my 25th birthday my partner took his own life and I ended up moving back home with my parents after 7 years of independence in a different city. I'd left my job, had no idea how to get where I wanted to be career wise and hardly knew anyone where I was living...at the time I was so frustrated and couldn't believe that was how my life had turned out.

That was 10 years ago and I'm so much happier these days - I own a beautiful home, have an amazing partner, a great social life, and I've completed an MA, which has opened so many doors for my career-wise.

Don't give up hope, OP...

OP primary teaching is soooo much fun! But also hard work. Consider it, if you haven't already.

At 25 I had just moved countries to start my PhD and had also just met future H.
Sadly now bastard XH, but have a lovely DS to show for it.
DS was only born in my 30s.

Hmm, i'm 25... pregnant with dc3 who was an accident we are learning to love,a great house but we need to move to a bigger one and soon, a dp who is pretty much great but is prone to stupid slightly scary outbursts a couple of times a year (MH issues), no real career path i've been a sahm for the past 2 years and don't have any 'real' ambition, when not pregnant i'm still fat even though i find it easy to lose weight i just don't do it, my sister is a narc, my mother acts like a 12 year old - self centred and obsessed with men..

Life is good though, i'm happy most of the time, dp is good to me, the kids are pretty brilliant if ds would just calm down and i have great friends who i know care about me even tho i'm never around because i'm pretty closed off from most people but they still love me :) yeah lifes turning out alright i suppose

Moving countries meant going to live in London. :)

I'm 35. At 25 I was an unemployed pizza waitress living in a tiny village in Crete scraping beer money together to go out every night.
I had absolutely no responsibilities and answered to no-one. It was great!
I like my life with DH and DS much more though. I'm very, very lucky.

I absolutely loved being 25! My mid twenties were great. I had a job in a school I loved so much it didn't feel like working! I made some amazing friends and had a great social life. I'd got a mortgage and loved owing my own home. My late twenties and now early thirties haven't been so great though sadly. Perhaps you will be the opposite and things will get better for you as you approach 30...?!

Having great friends counts for a lot in my experience.

2004. Had two degrees, a decentish job, totally in love with, er, someone I never went out with, but it was fun anyway. Fantastic social life. A stone lighter. Looked like a bloody fox. I was still living with my parents but that wouldn't last long. I still believed that the "right" future was out there somewhere.

Sheesh, I'd go back there in an instant.

Im 26,i have qualifications but still not found what i want to do,i work part time( prob not a job to my full potential but i am happy to have a job!),have one toddler DS,lovely partner of a decade who has a job he enjoys,people who we love and they love us too,our own home which im slowly doing up and i still have dreams that can come true.i did think id have gone to uni and have a high earning job.i like my simple life and im grateful for the good things we have x