I carnt take this shit anymore..... i just carnt...

[MySonIsMyWorld]

Hi All,
my relationship with "DP" is over, i carnt take the shit anymore. I just carnt do it. Since my ds was born dp has walked in and out on diffrent occasions but recently he hasnt done it, anyway, ds woke up poorly last wednesday early hours and he had peed out of his nappy so needing changing and by the time i had changed him and settled him he was wide awake, dp was going on about how he had to get up for work in x amount of time moan moan moan anyway ds was jumping on bed at this point 4.30am and he fell onto dp head so he pushed him quite aggresivly off him onto me and we ended up headbutting ds thought it was a game but it really did hurt me, DS is 21 months can i just add anyway i stayed calm and just told him to get up for work and go to work, he ended up hitting me with his trousers which hit our ds too he then started saying i was a fucking cunt, fucking prick, fucking whore blah blah blah etc etc so instead of retaliating (sorry for spelling) i was laughing with ds going silly daddy silly daddy so ds couldnt hear his dad calling his mum a fucking cunt, anyway, ended up with dp punching through our tv in ourbedroom while son was sat in our bed, then he said to me "your not laughing now are you". I told him to get out took his key off him and calmly locked the door and went back to bed with my ds didnt hear from him untill saturday morning - not a whimper, i was very very happy actually. In the meantime id bagged all his stuff up and put it out back for him to collect (if he did, the other times he walked out he just went out with is £1600 wage and brought all new stuff) and id put the tv out back too so when i saw it i could remember why i didnt need this twat head in my life no more but whenever my ds saw it he would say "daddy bang bang!" and point at tv so moved it in the end so ds couldnt see it - anyway.....
Saturday morning he knocks on the door i tell him i dont want to talk to him and i dont care, he says please, i let him in to talk, he gives me all the tears how much he thought about me and ds how much he loves us etc etc how he has no where to stay how he will go to the doctors about his anger blah blah refuses to leave, i give up and go to my grans house, when i get back home he has literaly done nothing but sit and watch tv (So much for change) and ds is asleep in my arms he starts an argument, telling me my parenting skills are crapp, i dont look affter ds because ds doesnt get disiplined by me etc etc how i dont want him here blah blah i told him that it will not work i want him to leave i carnt do it all again, he says did i mean it that it was over i said yes he slams my front door into my pram (lucky ds wasnt in it!) and tells me "how it fucking breaks" which wakes my poor ds up so i ring the police.

Next minute he is at my neighbours who i share a yard with, her backdoor backs onto my back door stood outside my back door with my neighbour smoking looking straight through my window!!!! He begs me to let me stay because its raning and he has no where to go blah blah blah i say he can stay on ds bedroom floor as ds doesnt sleep in his cot yet (still in our bed) anyway he at work the next two days, things are ok, we get on much more when he at work , on the 3rd day he is off and he is stropping around the house, swearing, not doing anything, back to his usual self anyway today i told him to go out for abit at 3pm to get out my hair for abit, he comes in at 7pm stinking of booze wakes our ds up who i was trying to settle to sleep and tells me he been sat in the pub with his mate all evening while i been looking after our ds so ive told him to go, i carnt do all this shit anymore i carnt be mentally abused i carnt have him telling me everything i do is wrong or shit anymore i carnt do it...the problem i have now is i have £288 a month spare for food, clothes, petrol, car matience, everything and i dont know how im going to do it! :'(

PS...Not actually sad that ive left my dp....feel free....feel happy!!!! more pissed off with the fact he has £1600 a month for himself for a job I GOT HIM!!!" ugh.

[MySonIsMyWorld]

I dont work at the moment, dp worked i stayed at home. Im currently at night classes doing hair cutting to carry on my career as a hairdresser so thats what im aiming for. I know your right about it being a vicious circle, i think i wanted him to want to come home so i could be the one in control...

Still very annoyed he back at his mothers, after everything she has done and everything he said about her he back there.... i just need to remember why i threw him out in the first place and keep reminding myself.

I dont like the fact he knows where i am and i dont have a clue what he doing/where he is....im scared to go town incase i bump into him and go wobbly!!

Still no contact off him by the way...... ds is running riot still.... thank you for being here for me everyone... your great

[cjel]

here as long as you want. Found focusing on me was helpful, biggest wobbles I have are thinking about what hes doing. could do with a good hairdresser btw!!

[MySonIsMyWorld]

Yeah thats my biggest wobble!! Who he with where he is what he doing...blah blah
He actually just stole a pic from my face book of our son and put it on his profile....bastard..... made sure everything private now i hate face book but im addicted to the games hahahaaa

I could travel haha x

[maidmarian2012]

I know its very late to be adding to this thread, but Good God, the "man" in question could almost be my XP!! The violence, disgusting language, dissapearing for days drinking etc. To Hell with him!! You will be much better off without him, what a tool.

I wish you well x