I've never admitted our problems on MN before...

[Chubfuddler]

But I've read an awful lot of threads about abusive husbands. And imagining what my thread would look like, imagining your replies, knowing what you would say (because I've read the same threads over and over, and even dished out advice I wasn't ready to take myself) finally gave me the courage to leave.

The DCs and are are crammed in my mums spare room. For a while my life will be a topsy turvey mess but I don't care.

Because no man is ever going to hit me again.

So thank you. From the bottom of my heart.

You are a brave & inspirational woman. Huge congratulations.

Chub, so pleased you have made that leap. Well done.

Well done you and welcome to your awesome new life. :)

Congratulations!

You have done the right thing. No question.
Very well done, and lots of love. xxx

Congratulations

Congratulations!
Your children will adore you forever for escaping. I'm a child of a strong, amazing woman who did what you've done and we think of them as heroes in the true sense of the world.
Feel the weight lift off your shoulders!
Money & housing & court issues etc will be nothing now you've got rid of the trash!

Well done you. You and your children deserve so much more than an abusive husband and father.

Good on you Chub great to hear such positive news.

Congratulations on leaving and calling the police. :)

It is indeed a lot easier. It's just that first step that seems so hard. But the wall crumbles as soon as you push it.

You mentioned about not being proud. I think that's quite right.
Often we stay because we don't want to admit that we chose the wrong person. That our lives aren't perfect. That we are "weak" and not really in control of our lives.
It is ok to ask for support and it's ok to admit to what is wrong in our lives. :)

BTW, "Because no man is ever going to hit me again."
well, another man could hit you again. You can't prevent that. And it won't be your failure.
But, hopefully, you won't let him hit you a second time. That is the key.

Congratulations - I'm so glad you got out & have RL support. You know I'm sure that he will start sending flowers etc to try to get you back but stay strong & MNetters are always here for support.

My huge congratulations to you. I know your comment about eggshells will resonate with many many people. I'm sure your words will become a part of someone else's decision to make that same step away from a terrible situation and on to a positive happy future where your life is on your own terms.

True someone could hit me. But the first time they do will also be the last time.

I only mentioned it because if it were to happen, it could make you feel worse than with ex, as you might feel that it was your fault in failing to prevent it, or choosing the wrong man again.

Hopefully, you'd put the blame fully on him.

And, hopefully, it won't happen again. Remember the red flags, but just don't go overboard and don't let this put you off men forever. :o

Awesome resolve. Very inspirational to others in the same situation.
A bit teary here. Brings memories when ex hit me really badly and I left immediately. Like you I resolved that no man would ever hit me again.

Make sure you recalibrate your twunt radar like Lueji said.
Keep strong. Good luck.

Just another voice saying "YES, aren't you great!" and thinking the world is a happier place today

You are very brave. Well done. It can only get better.

Well done Chub, now you can smile without worrying what's in store for you later, should the OH be in a bad mood.

So glad when ppl successfully leave DV situations & post on MN, hope it inspires someone else to take the kids & leave...

Keep smiling things can only get better from now on! Big hug!

Well done. Keep strong and never go back!

Wow - did this happen last night? How are you and dcs?

Well done Chub! and for good measure (as it's a bit early for )

It takes a lot of strength to do what you've done - now you can start rebuilding your life and your self-esteem, brilliant! :)

Well done Chub congratulations and your new life starts here! It will be the best decision you ever made, believe in yourself because we all believe in you xxx

Well done Chub

Nice one, Chub!

Well done! I was talking about this in counselling on Friday, not that I have ever been a sufferer of DV, but we were talking about the fear of the future, the fear of the unknown and she said that is the reason why most DV sufferers stay where they are because of the fear of change, the fear of the unknown, how will they manage, money housing etc and also the fear that nobody else will ever want them, because that is usually what they are told. (She also does Victim Support).

She said that once they face up to that fear and realise that the future will be OK, that they will survive and that they will be happy, happier, than they are now, no matter what, then they finally find the courage to leave. Because it does take courage to leave.

All the best for the future. You have made that all important first step into the unknown and you will be fine xx