You're very kind, Aussie, thank you. I find the only way I can cope with it is to detach, otherwise it's all histrionics and upset. And funnily enough she's started to calm down a bit if I don't respond. For example, yesterday she was going on about shopping for food...what was there in the way of supermarkets in the village (how unbelievable is it that she doesn't even know?? Shows how much she's just removed herself from everything except sitting watching Sky and whingeing) and I said there was a supermarket opposite DS' school. ..."ooh that's a long walk". I said, it's 5 mins. She says, "but I walk with a stick, I can't carry anything much" so I said drive to the other supermarket 10 mins away or shop online and she starts, "stop going on and on about shop online, you're like a broken record". I said something like well that's the answer to the question, don't ask if you don't want to hear the answer. Because, it's true. If she wants heavy stuff and doesn't want to carry it, then she can order it. Funnily enough...heavy stuff like a 6 pack of milk that she famously managed to carry to the car and get down to the flat. But I digress...she stormed off and, where in the past I'd have gone after her and apologised and smoohted things over I carried on making the lunch. Had been making tea, so took her in a cup and she said she was "sorry but it really annoys me when you go on about online shopping". I said nothing (I would have justified myself before) and things were calmer later.
For whoever it was who asked (sorry I can't remember) I haven't had any headaches just recently and my back's OK but I am so so so tired. The excitement is getting to DS and he's been waking earlier and earlier (6.25 today) and then is "challenging" during the day.
Oh yes, yesterday some art prints DM had ordered arrived and she was showing me (they're very nice) she was saying she'd ordered them as she didn't want the place looking like "an empty warehouse" once we move but now she was worried she'd ordered too many and would never get them all framed and (through breaking voice and sobs) "it's keeping me awake at night with anxiety". That's designed to guilt me again (you'll give me nervous breakdown/I suffer from depression etc). I said brightly "oh well, bit by bit"
I have to plan my classes for today and tomorrow and I have some more things to try to pack up today and DH is still building ikea furniture and sorting out stuff at the house. Tomorrow I have my day off from work to run around like a blue arsed fly and then it's the big day on Friday! I've actually done an online order myself, going to have it delivered on Friday so we have some food and basics like soap, toilet paper etc.