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Original poster

What would you think if someone said to you on a second date "I get bored easily"?

53 replies

madonnawhore · 01/12/2012 09:01

That's what a woman said to my dad when he took her out on a second date.

I told him that if a man said something like that to me on a date I'd think he was arrogant and that that comment was designed to keep him on the back foot.

What do you think? Have I just sabotaged my dad's love life?! He hasn't been in a relationship with anyone since my mum died five years ago.

OP posts:
amillionyears · 01/12/2012 10:18

She could be bigging up her exes.
I would let him find out whether he likes her for himself.

I think if we were all critiqued over 2 dates, we would all come up "failing" in some way or other.

The world would end up with no one hooked up with anyone.

TheOriginalPan · 01/12/2012 10:35

She sounds like a disaster area. If your dad is clever (which is evidenced by the fact he is talknig to you about this stuff) he will be aware of this fact.
He could of course just be a 'player' and enjoy her for sex, but making himself in anyway vulnerable to her would be madness.

Original poster
madonnawhore · 01/12/2012 10:56

My dad is very sensitive bless him. Can't imagine him as a 'player'! boak. drinks mind bleach

OP posts:
TravelinColour · 01/12/2012 11:07

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

amillionyears · 01/12/2012 11:33

The way I look at it is this.
If your dad had 2 dates with your mum, and you were around back then, he may well have come back to you and said stuff. And you may have ended up warning him off her.

dequoisagitil · 01/12/2012 11:42

If he came back from the date feeling deflated, then you're right to point out that it might be her, not him.

I don't think he should keep seeing someone who doesn't make him feel good about himself. Why push on? Better cast his net again Grin.

ProphetOfDoom · 01/12/2012 11:46

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

SHoHoHodan · 01/12/2012 11:50

I don't like the sound of her at all, tbh. Too much emphasis on previous boyfriends careers etc as well as the 'I get bored easily' comment.

Your dad shouldn't be coming back from a second date feeling deflated- since he has, I'd take it as a sign that it's a no-goer.

digerd · 01/12/2012 11:58

I'd drop that person like a hot brick. Your poor dad. Grieving for your mum for 5 years and then he finds this poor excuse for a woman. He's not thinking clearly.

Hope he finds someone he deserves - she is not one of them

ImperialBlether · 01/12/2012 12:38

Come on, OP, give some of us a chance! How old is he and where does he live?

TheOriginalPan · 01/12/2012 12:55

OP - I was deliberately teasing about the player thing. He sounds a really lovely bloke and made of entirely different stuff to the Black Widow.

Punkatheart · 01/12/2012 14:03

I haven't been on a date for twenty one years so maybe I am out of touch. Of course you have to talk about yourself to some extent...but telling someone 'I bore easily' or 'I am easily bored' is too much me me me....arrogance. You get an air from someone...but also, there is a possibility that when people are insecure, they may seem arrogant......

SolidGoldYESBROKEMYSPACEBAR · 01/12/2012 16:09

It's only the second date FFS. SHe might well have meant, you are a nice chap but I don't see you as the love of my life/I am not looking for a serious relationship. I think it's a 'back off but I don't want to be rude' sort of comment.

Jux · 01/12/2012 16:50

People who get bored easily tend to be pretty boring themselves. Little ability to keep themselves occupied and amused often means they are pretty superficial, and require stimulus from those around them to fill the gaping hole. They may have learnt a few tricks to get someone onside and appear to have greater internal resources than they actually do, but eventually they will become very high maintenance.

needsomeperspective · 01/12/2012 17:33

I think people are being massively harsh. I have ADHD. I would always describe myself as "easily bored" tongue in cheek. What that actually means is if I go on holiday I like to be active and sight see and pack in the action not lie on a beach - because I'm easily bored.

When I watch a film it has to be a good one or else I lose interest and don't bother to watch the end - because I'm easily bored.

I keep myself extremely busy and have lots of projects on the go all the time - because I'm easily bored.

I have loads of friends and am very sociable, entertain often and chat to all and sundry - because I'm easily bored.

Describing yourself as easily bored isn't arrogant and doesn't mean you're boring - quite the opposite I'd say. People who are easily bored like full, stimulating, interesting lives and tend to have to keep busy. They don't like to just flop in front of the box and vegetate with shit TV. They don't settle for mundane or expect others to either.

If someone said to me they were easily bored I think I'd hit the jackpot as I would expect them to like to be as active and have as fulfilling life as possible.

fabulousathome · 01/12/2012 18:04

Could it even be a compliment to your Dad, as in "I get bored easily but you are not boring"?

She sounds like she's a bit keen on the dramatic statements to be honest. Could just be that she's a bit nervous on these early dates. I think he could give it a few more weeks if he's keen on her.

Just to be wary, that's all.

CogitOCrapNotMoreSprouts · 01/12/2012 18:26

"I get bored easily" = get ready for some attention-seeking behaviour.

"I'm as over it as I'll ever be" = I think men find my emotional vulnerability attractive

Sort of depends if he can be bothered to find out more really... Confused

tinkertitonk · 01/12/2012 18:53

Far too soon to tell.

Have they shagged yet? What happens then is would be more significant.

Original poster
madonnawhore · 01/12/2012 19:07

Ewwww tinkertonk I haven't talked to him about that!

But I dont think my dad puts out until at least the fifth or sixth date. Drinks mind bleach again

On the specific facts of this case, I sense that this woman is a teensy bit shallow and high maintenance. And the majority of you on this thread seem to have picked up on that too, just on what little I've shared here. So I'm feeling less worried that I'm inadvertently ruining my dad's love life.

I would love for him to find someone who can see how bloody lovely and amazing he is though.

OP posts:
Punkatheart · 01/12/2012 19:09

I hope he finds someone truly lovely, madonna.

I have given up on that side of my life now.....I am thinking about getting cats....lots and lots of cats.......

Original poster
madonnawhore · 01/12/2012 19:10

Lots of 'loves' and 'lovelies' in that post.

OP posts:
Original poster
madonnawhore · 01/12/2012 19:12

Ha Punkatheart he has a cat! She follows him everywhere. Sits outside the bathroom at night waiting for him to finish brushing his teeth and then follows him to bed. It's so cute.

I think she'd be furiously jealous if my dad fell in love with another woman.

OP posts:
wellthatsdoneit · 01/12/2012 19:13

If anyone said that to me I'd think they sounded fickle and self absorbed.

Mu1berries · 01/12/2012 19:36

I agree with the interpretation. I bet she's not that entertaining herself.

I had a (now) friend of a friend dump me ten years ago and she said to our mutual friend that she gets bored of people quite easily. The funny thing was that I had found her company quite underwhelming really. I wasn't broken hearted. But it was her sense of entitlement that people [jazz hands] entertain her that left me, eh, Confused......... thank god i wasn't dating her.

Mu1berries · 01/12/2012 19:40

Madonnawhore, is your dad making the CLASSIC mistake all men make when they do internet dating and trying to date women far too young for him??

Apologies if this is not the case. I just think older men have a better chance of finding somebody who sees them for who they really are, and somebody who will genuinely find them attractive and enjoy their company if only they'd go for somebody their own age.