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Relationships

Mumsnet has not checked the qualifications of anyone posting here. If you need help urgently or expert advice, please see our domestic violence webguide and/or relationships webguide. Many Mumsnetters experiencing domestic abuse have found this thread helpful: Listen up, everybody

See all MNHQ comments on this thread

mumsnet widower poison

134 replies

jm8997 · 11/10/2012 00:19

I have no one else to talk to about my feelings. My wife has family and friends, but she also appears to spend a lot of time on mumsnet. I feel suicidal, lonely and always blamed for the bad things that happen in life. Some of the threads on this website are so intensely vitriolic and polarised that I believe my wife is being destroyed from the beautiful kind loving person I married. Her addiction to mumsnet is really scaring me, yet I fear I cannot raise it with her as she would get angry with me. Help?

OP posts:
PedanticPanda · 11/10/2012 17:01

I'm not demanding anything, I'm making a point that those particular comments are unnecessary and explained why. You can't claim that it is a supportive community and then not listen when someone puts the point across that posting 'reported' could be detrimental and could prevent people from receiving support.

HoneyDragon · 11/10/2012 17:03

I didn't say you were demanding anything. But the op did.

Littleblue · 11/10/2012 17:05

Listening's a two way street pp....

Lueji · 11/10/2012 17:08

Actually, it's just one way.
One talks the other listens.

Having a conversation on the other hand...

HoneyDragon · 11/10/2012 17:08

Lots of comments can be detrimental because mos posts are not from a point of expertise but from subjectivity.

Saying I have reported your post can be taken in many ways.

From a purely subjective point of view I would expect someone new to the site who had written genuinely from the heart and desperate for help to want to know why it had been reported.

But thats just me.

Lueji · 11/10/2012 17:14

My gut feeling is that this OP was not from the heart, but very manipulative.

My impression, in fact, was that this man is actually abusive to his wife.

If he wanted to let her know about his feelings, without being face to face, he could have written to her.
No need for such show on MN.

It really felt like my ex's dramatics.
Not a cry for help.

And I have been in both situations. With a person who committed suicide a few days later and let out hints that not all was well, but not enough clues.
And with twat ex who didn't kill himself but sounded like bad Shakespearean acting.

usualsuspect3 · 11/10/2012 17:21

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

usualsuspect3 · 11/10/2012 17:24

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

AnEerieAirOfHorror · 11/10/2012 17:26

Whatever the reason the op was offencive to a poster and ignored the talk guild lines.

Also it is an internet chat site the op was directed to where he could get help but he chose not to.

The op has mh issues weather he is an abuser or not and needs professional help and he would never get that from mn as its not full of experts or mh workers.

I think the post 'reported' is only used on threads where it is knowen to be goading or trolling.

On the subject of trolling this week a men of 20 was taken to court for it and prosacuted.

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