This is more of a 'am I imagining this ?' thread. I would n't want to say this in RL as it all sounds a bit woolly but here goes. I have a local friend, lets call her Tina. Her son is in the same year as mine and they are friends. We speak via email/text regularly and see each other quite a bit. All sounds good.
However, she is always so sly in want of a better word.Just lots of underhand comments and little digs. I can't quite put my finger on it. Here are a few examples:
1.I was telling her how bad I feel about not being able to take my daughter for her first day at school (my mum is doing it so not the end of the world)due to work. Further into the conversation she starts telling me how she is going to take a years sabbatical when her youngest starts school so she can be around. I read that back and it looks a bit ridiculous but at the time I thought I just wouldn't have said that at that time to a friend who is clearly worried about not being around for the childs first day at school.
- Tina offered to take my son to the cinema with her son. My son is a good reader- just one of those things. Her son is good at maths. All good at different things blah, blah. Tina returns and says while they were out they did some maths and she was "surprised her son could do the sums but my son couldn't". I was a bit
at the comment and why was she testing my son. Weird but just ignored it.
3.Every time her son goes to a party that my son hasn't been invited to she calls me up saying " lovely party, the whole class was there.blah blah." I reply calmly "well Tom wasn't so the whole class wasn't there". She even spent an hour talking to me once listing all the people who were there and how odd that Tom wasn't.At the time it upset me as it became clear that Tom was the only one not invited but I am guessing there was a mix up somewhere.Anyway I digress.
She is also constantly commenting on other mums (very threatened by anyone slim/attractive) as well as the children.
But.
She can also be great fun.The above is not the whole of her character by any means. But over the years I have learnt not to share my worries as she then seems to say something that almost rubs my face in it.
How do you handle people like this?I find it so darn confusing.
I veer between thinking she is just plain tactless or an utter bitch. I pulled her up on the party comments by telling her she was being insensitive and she turned it round by telling other people I get funny about parties. So now I look like a loon when one less party would be great.
How do you deal with people like this?Ignore or say something and if so what?
Wow that was quite a rant.