Have I blown it? Girlfriend material to f*** Buddy material?

[RedChin]

Know a guy two weeks. Been out with him 5 times - in that time we've done cinema, bowling, 2 meals, an all night drinking pubcrawl, walk on the beach and a music festival. We talk everyday via facebook and text. I really like him and he seems to really like me.
So last night he's driving us to another nice destination and I ask him what time I should tell my babysitter I'll be back. He says it's completely upto me - he will get me back any time I want. It goes back and forth a bit and he then says "well if your babysitter is staying all night, would you like to stay at my house?"

I know I've only known him two weeks but I wanted to. I agreed.
After our date we go back to his house, watch a DVD, have some drinks and then end up having sex 4 times over the course of the night he was very loving, lots of cuddles, constantly making sure I was ok, fetching me drinks etc and we had a really lovely night. He was still very loving towards me this morning.

He's just sent me a text now saying he had a fantastic night and had the best time ever. I'm thinking "shit, I've crossed the line from girlfriend material to fuck buddy material". Am I over thinking it or have I blown any chance of a real relationship with this guy?

overthinking. calm down, he said he had a great night - how on earth can you read anymore into that!?

He sounds great, just watch it unfold and enjoy the journey.

Ummmmmm...

...you've met a bloke you like, you've had some fun dates, now you've had a great shag, he's been 'loving', he now says he's had 'the best time ever'. Am I missing something here? What exactly is the problem?

What? Why would sleeping with a man mean you are fuckbuddy material??? Relax! He respects you, otherwise you would not have been seeing so much of each other. Sex is normal and natural, like sharing a meal. He's telling you what a nuce time he had - you reach this conclusion? I hope you have not texted him back yet! If so, text something NICE to him and then wait for the next date suggestion.

I'd ask myself - why am I paranoid and why do I use language about women like 'f*ckbuddy' for what is normal between men and women.......answer those qs, and that will get you further in life. x

He's just sent me a text now saying he had a fantastic night and had the best time ever.

What text do you think would have better indicated that you were girlfriend material?! Calm down and enjoy it.

I was kicking myself for going to bed with a man too soon
...it was our 10th wedding anniversary last month :)

I don't see the problem? Sounds like girlfriend to me.

Aren't you already having a real relationship with him? Maybe you want to slow it down a bit?

FWIW I think it all sounds perfect so far

Gosh bongaloo, I think 10 years is a bit long to make him wait :)

Honestly, op, what are you on about? Chillax. (Kindly meant - sounds like all's going well, enjoy)

Gosh bongaloo, I think 10 years is a bit long to make him wait :)

Honestly, op, what are you on about? Chillax. (Kindly meant - sounds like all's going well, enjoy)

Little secret I slept with DH on the 4th date and we have now been married for 7 years. Just text him back "me too x" nice and short so its not emotional but enough for him to know that his feelings are reciprocated.

Do you think that the way to become a 'girlfriend' is to withhold sex until the man has jumped through a dozen hoops and bought you some expensive jewellery? The only sort of man who will 'respect' a woman who uses her fanny as a bargaining tool is a man who doesn't respect women at all.

It's my understanding that the majority of people who are beginning, or seeking, longterm heterosexual relationships generally have sex on the third or fourth date; you waited till the fifth date. What makes you think anything's gone wrong here?

Blimey, if I'd waited for expensive jewellery I'd still be waiting - luckily I slept with him on the 3rd date

This has got to be the biggest case of overthinking I've ever seen on MN. Relaaaaaax, OP!

Solid is right dh and I were a 4th date couple and been nearly a decade now.

Just don't tell him about this thread or he'll think you're a right loon!

Yup what's the problem?!!!

I wish there was a "delete thread" button on here

ok thanks guys, I text him back saying I had a great night too - and I was impressed with his stamina lol

I was first date.....well first 30 odd mins....nothing wrong with shagging someone you like as long as you are careful and safe, etc, etc.

You can ask for the thread to be deleted - just click 'Report'.

The only sort of man who will 'respect' a woman who uses her fanny as a bargaining tool is a man who doesn't respect women at all.

Amen!

Erm, not seeing a problem here ?

It's fine. And if he was up for it 4 times you obviously do it for him big time, so the all-important chemistry is there- date 4 is about right to be testing it out! Relax, enjoy, and if you are at all worried about how he perceives you, just tell him that you are a bit worried he respects you less and hope that he sees this as the start of a relationship. hopefully he'll put your mind at rest and if he doesn't, we'll, at least you know where you stand.

Sounds great

My credo is that if someone is a decent normal person and likes you they are not going to be put off by sex for crying out loud! Anyone who thinks like that isn't my sort of person anyway. So in fact it is better to have sex ASAP to separate the wheat from the chaff!

Having said that me and DH didn't do it til the third date, and that was something of a record for me

I once slept with a bloke before our first date. We have been together 8 years, married 6 and have 3 kids.

overthinking - he sounds lovely, lovely text - sounds like teh start of laovely relationship! (Owning up: Another one here who slept with DH before our first date - we have been married 16 years, two DC )