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Relationships

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Original poster

How often do you see your Mum?

65 replies

Northerner · 08/03/2006 19:17

I ask because sometimes I feel guilty for not seeing enough of her. She lives about 1 hour drive away from me but I don't drive yet so rely on dh taking me. He works most weekends so when he is off we want to spend it together. We get to see my parents about every 6 weeks. We speak every day for 20 mins/half an hour. She calls at bath time/bedtime and I work and have a social life so if I can't talk to her for long, she gets a bit huffy, and says I have no time for her, which makes me feel bad. Dh gets annoyed she makes me feel like this, and says if she had a job/something to do she wouldn't be like this.

I am an only child and she is quite needy and gets upset that she is not involved with my ds on a day to day business.

My Mum and Dad don't drive so rely on us going to them.

It is so difficult pleasing everyone.

OP posts:

Spongebob · 09/03/2006 14:34

About 3 times a year, and I have to share her with my Brothers family too. :( She lives in Spain and although we always argue....I wish she was nearer.

macwoozy · 09/03/2006 14:35

Twice a year, and a couple of times a year we speak on the phone to each other. In my early 20's we went 5 years without speaking, we didn't have a major bust up or anything, she just got on with her life and me with mine. It sounds harsh but we hardly know each other anymore.

Lasvegas · 09/03/2006 14:52

She lives 4 hours drive away. She comes for 3 nights very 2 months. Once a year she comes for a whole week when I end up with flu or childminder closed etc. She comes to see DD not me.

emmawill · 09/03/2006 15:03

We speak every day and then see each other about 2 or 3 times a week but we only live 10 minutes away and my dh live in the west indies so there's no comptition from them.

jessicaandrebeccasmummy · 09/03/2006 15:14

never.... last time i saw her was august 7th 2004 3 hours before she died unexpectadly.

My dad on the other hand.... speak on phone for an hour a day and see him most weekends, be it he comes here on the train or we go and see him.

newkid · 09/03/2006 15:18

speak on phone at least once a week. probably see her twice a year. i consider this lucky as she lives 7,000 miles away. am v jealous of the mums with mums who live close by. am seeing her next month!

WharfRat · 09/03/2006 15:22

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn

sweetkitty · 09/03/2006 15:31

Nowadays about once every 2 months (we are an hours drive away) speak to her on the phone about every 1-2 weeks, we aren't close and she never volunteers to help out with the kids.

Used to live at the other end of the country and would see her 3 times a year then we moved a mile away for 4 months and she still wouldn't make an effort to come and visit.

Am very at people who have a great relationship with their mothers.

biglips · 09/03/2006 15:36

i see my mum at least twice a week

anniemac · 09/03/2006 15:41

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

muma3 · 09/03/2006 16:14

anniemac- you are completely right i dont have any contact with my nother and dont wish to for various reasons. some people dont see thier parents due to them dying etc and i feel for those but my mother decided she didnt want me to be part of her life. as a result i love my kids more then i thought was possible and i know that my own "mother" has made me stronger by her actions and attitude towrads me and i know that my 3 daughters will never have to feel that kind of rejection from me . i have gained strength from my bad childhood . doesnt mean i dont know what i am missing (or what she is missing ) and sometimes i wonder what it would be like to have a "mother " in my llife and my kids life to do the "normal" mother / daughter things. i just know that my girls will get all the love they need and i can do all these things with them .

meggmoo · 09/03/2006 16:16

Not often enough - she lives a few hours away - I miss her so much and am very of my sister who lives 2 miles away and her children have that extra special relationship with her that we never had as children (both sets of our grandparents lived abroad)

I try to see her at least once a month or at half terms when we'll stay for about 6 or 7 days - bliss.

NatalieJane · 09/03/2006 16:17

My mum lives about 4 hours drive away so we don't see her nearly as often as we would like to :( I would say once in every 2 or 3 months.

anniemac · 09/03/2006 16:21

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

soyabean · 09/03/2006 16:26

My Mum is about 600 miles away. We go there maybe 2-3 times a year and she tries to come here for a few days every couple of months or so. It was hard for years as her partner was ill so she couldnt get away. Sadly he died 2 years ago so she is on her own now, which is hard for her, but I guess the freedom is the positive side to that.

Our relationship is fine, not close but I know she cares and loves the children. She has made it clear that she doesnt think grandparents should do too much childcare so its just as well we dont live nearby or that might be an issue!

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