Would love to list all of the reasons why I despise my FIL at the moment, as I really need to let off steam but it would go on and on and I'm worried about outing myself in RL although I doubt any of the in laws would be on here and this would probably out me anyway.
He lives across the other side of the country and visits when it suits him with his wife. He has a long history of being unfaithful to his string of partners, leaving DH's mum for her friend and abandoning DH and siblings, impregnating the next wife and then having no contact with his next child, and has now been married to his current wife for a good few years although is apparently having an affair with a 25 year old (I don't think this is true though he would if he could, he has a bit of a habit of living in a fantasy land and for whatever reason I think he thought saying this would impress people).
I recently found out that last year he had made a completely inappropriate sexual comment to my cousin's wife on a family holiday. My cousin's wife hadn't told me about this, she is very shy and probably knew it would cause trouble if she told people. I am really angry that he would dare to make sexual comments to a member of my family, a woman married to my cousin and a mother of three young children. He has caused enough damage to his own dysfunctional family, how dare he try to seep poison into my family! I have bitten my tongue as, by the same note, I feel unable to 'cause trouble', especially as we have recently cut other members of DH's family out of our lives for different reasons.
Whilst he was staying up here with his wife, I said nothing about it although I feel as if steam is coming out of my ears with the effort. At one point I was standing in the kitchen alone. He came in, and after a short while asked me if I could undo his belt buckle for him because he couldn't do it. He asked in a perfectly friendly and casual tone of voice, which I feel was intentional. I feel like he tries to push boundaries to gage what kind of reaction he would get, and makes comments which he knows that he would be able to deny any kind of sexual intent involved if the woman involved kicked up a fuss. I responded by shouting 'DH, come and undo your dad's belt buckle for him, he can't do it himself'. I have since told DH how angry I am and what a cunt I think his dad is, and whilst DH says he knows that this comment was inappropriate, he hasn't said anything else about it. In fact he said, 'what do you want me to do, cut him out like I cut my mum out?' As if I am the evil daughter in law trying to isolate him from his lovely family. I really really feel that his comment was intentionally sexual and I am disappointed with myself for not being more assertive. I believe that he thinks that he is god's gift to women, and he is honestly far below average in every way you can imagine. He would, for example, in the mornings go to the spare room and get changed into clean socks, jeans and even put a belt on but then walk around the house topless for hours. I'm not a prude, but I found it laughable that he purposefully went shirtless as he clearly thinks his body is a lovely treat for the ladies.
In other ways, I despise him and his wife because they are users and takers. They have very little interest in their son. We have recently experienced a rough few months, a miscarriage, DH was suspended for a long time from work and has only just been reinstated, death in the family etc however none of this was mentioned. FIL emailed me to tell me he was coming to stay with us and actually wrote within the email that 'it will have to be a cheap weekend I'm afraid as I'm skint' (he lost his job a few months ago). Fair enough but why act as if he would usually wine and dine us because that is not the case. We are skint, I'm on maternity leave, and what would usually happen is that I would cook for everyone and that is exactly what happened on this visit. I cooked lots of homemade meals to a chorus of 'I'm hungry, it's 2pm, oh I'm so hungry, there's not enough bacon in this carbonara' (his wife), made sure they had towels etc which were then left screwed up next to the bath (FIL).
I became sick to death of their bragging about their expensive hair cuts, all the shows they have been going to and expensive meals they have. They just wanted to go shopping, and look at houses to buy or rent up here (NOOO) as in big six bed houses completely out of their budget. DH fucking panders to them and was actually driving them round so they could look at these huge houses they can't afford, why? It makes them worse when they believe they have an audience of people who think they are the people they want to be.
I am sick of their fantasy lives. We all know they aren't well off, he hasn't got a job but when he did he would pretend he was a huge high flier head of everything raking it in, they haven't paid off the capital of their mortgage although are not too far from retirement, although do choose to live this lifestyle of theatres, hotels, and meals that they can't afford.
Well, I have definitely outed myself in anyone in RL reads this. Didn't mean to speak about anything other than the belt buckle thing but I couldn't seem to stop myself. Will probably have to ask to have this thread removed later on but just wanted to hear from someone, anyone, even if it's to say that I'm being bitchy and over the top.