Can men and women be just friends???

[mopbucket]

Well can they?
Met a guy online and have been chatting for months and were meeting up on wednesday for a brew (at mc donalds as its inbetween where we both live) he knows all about dh and my children and i know all about his children and nothing of his ex.
Dh is ok ish with us meeting up
Om is fab to chat to and were meeting soley as friends
Rl friends think im bonkers

Yes, men and women can be friends. I have a lot of female friends and never felt like shagging any of them, because they're friends and that's it. In addition, they're also friends of my DW.

However, I am going to say that I really feel for your DH. If he says he's 'ok-ish' about it, he really isn't. He's going to be sitting there at home alone in miserable agony imagining what you're doing and what you're talking about. I know, because I was in that situation long ago with a long-term GF when she decided she simply had to meet up for a 'brew' with someone she'd met casually through work.

Ach posted too soon - I meant to conclude that he didn't remain just a 'friend' for very long.

It's also very interesting you used 'OM' in your OP, as someone else has already pointed out.

OP you need to talk to someone in rl- step away from the computer and look into getting some therapy.

Conclusion: NO they cant

Did you meet him, Mop?

Yes he was nice but didnt want to be just friends so wont be seeing him again as he was fab to chic chat with.......oh well we live and learn

Ohhh how predictable. Fwiw now would be a good time to look at your own actions in this.

Anyone who actually read your op properly and knew what had been going on, could have told you what he was looking for. What was worse is he was after a fuck buddy and wanted to involve bringing the kids. Yuck.

Did it not occur to you at all that he would have seen you as easy prey? You say you didn't discuss what you did on here with him. Not directly no, maybe you didn't actually say to him, I want to shag about.

But talking daily, all of a sudden there are huge problems in your marriage and you want to fuck about. I bet subconsciously your issues in you marriage were not helped by your contact with him. Not to mention if you had been feeling as strongly as you did when you wrote that thread. Subtle things would have slipped out, you would have said things which undermined your marriage in his eyes. Hence why he was so keen, he thought he was onto an easy lay.

I mean come on op, you are hardly surprised are you? I think if you are really honest with yourself some boundary breaking had gone on. Hence your Saturday thread. Make it up to your dh, but be honest with yourself about your part in it too....or you'll do it again.

Well done for not falling for it. Now concentrate on your marriage and family :)

I have a friend that does this, meets guys, sends out mixed signals, chats with them til all hours, goes for lunch, and then, when they come on to her, is 'very surprised' and retreats home to her husband.

It is ridiculous to pretend as if it never occured to you he might want more than friendship, even if you wanted to be friends yourself, it would cross most people's mind, especially the way you met.

I hope OP that you got what you wanted, which let's face it, was an ego-boost. Of course you can't have male friends who take up significant time and energy away from your marriage, just as it would be unhealthy to have female ones doing the same.

If the potential to be 'just good friends' was there in every meeting of men and women, then there would be no affairs, would there?