so he's begged me to take him back

[KirstyWirsty]

Looks like we are going to get an offer on the house today but he now doesn't want to sell he wants to get back together.. almost 6 months to the day that i found proof of his affair that he'd denied for a year

He was in 'a bad place' and made 'bad decisions' but now he misses me and will be a much better husband.

The timing is impeccable what with the impending offer and that DD7 and I are jetting off on our first holiday without him today

I can't understand how he has the nerve after all he did and the horrid things he said to me.

He doesn't seem to be willing to listen to me. I have told him quite bluntly that I don't love him anymore abduction I don't want him back

Abduction = and (bloody phone)

Some have the belief that if you say you are sorry enough, you will be forgiven.

It sounds to me as if you cannot and will not and I don't blame you one bit.

Stay on track and enjoy your holiday!

Well done for staying strong and no longer believing his bull shit. Have a great holiday with your dd.

You so deserve that holiday. I hope you have a great time.
You've done the right thing :)

Yeah, been there.

Followed by horrible behaviour upon rejection.

And repeat.

No actions all this time and words now mean nothing.
Stay strong.

Enjoy that holiday and don't even glance back

Politely decline and get on with your life.

Have you noticed, that it is still all about him? So HE wants to come back into HIS family and household and HE will be a better husband.

They just don't get it do they. We are not things! We are not objects! What we yearn for (connectedness, honesty, warmth) is not some crazy possessive wimmin thing, it is human and desirable. We are not being punishing and neurotic and 'difficult' when we insist on it.

"He was in 'a bad place' and made 'bad decisions' but now he misses me and will be a much better husband."

The 'poor me' act is so demeaning. Did he do the big Puss in Boots eyes to match? That's the trouble with impulsive, selfish, short-sighted types. They think that just because they change their mind or say sorry, everyone will naturally go along with them. Enjoy your holiday and hope you get that offer on the house.

Can you remember the horrid things said to me?

My main one was 'I don't love you anymore and I never will again'.

Followed (when he got caught) by Maths list:

I never stopped loving you
It meant nothing
It was just sex
Its you I want

and I am being hugely unreasonable, because I won't 'move forward'.

Just looked up your post-discovery thread and found this posted by Xales on 2 January:

"Expect OW to decide she is staying with her H and your H to come crawling back saying he is sorry it was really you he wanted blah blah blah."

Full marks for prescience!

Oh Kirsty - I only saw your other thread recently and I knew before I clicked on this one that it would be you starting it.

Enjoy your holiday and do what it best for you and dd. Not h, who have up the right to your consideration with his lack of regard for you.

Hugs.

it's in the dickhead script, kirsty

tell him to go fuck himself

Hi Kirsty

Have followed your threads.

I think it's fairly obvious that this comes at a time when you are showing true independence and strength and are moving on - first holiday with dd without him, house nearly sold.

And yes it's a safe bet OW has ended it.

Hope you are ok

Don't do it. He's panicking about the reality of it all. I found myself ina similar situation but I was stupid enough to fall for it - and yes - he'd just been dumped by OW.

Walk away and keep your head held high

Agree with Proud - he is feeling threatened by your strength and independence. Enjoy your holiday and don't look back! He made his choices over and again, he has some nerve. I would bet this was calculated to stir you up before you went away just in case you fall in love with a waiter while you are away

at fall in love with a waiter

He hasn't even considered that I may have met someone else .. that didn't come into the equation at all ( I haven't but still!)

Many people said that he'd try to come back .. i didn't think he would .. I thought he knew me well enough to know i would never consider it

He seems more up for the house sale today so hopefully the message has sunk in and I'll miss the backlash by being away

And yes.. i got the puss in boots eyes, tears , sobbing... the works
...not one I love you though .. One lie he couldn't bring himself to tell perhaps??

He may not be able to tell you he loves you but he wants to keep you on his string. Stupid man can't see that snapped a long time ago. Stay hard, you are doing brilliantly

I had ex doing the script the day before the first divorce hearing.

And still after that. Mixed with threatening messages.

I'll never understand these men.

But we can predict what they do.

You are far, far better off without him.

well done for standing strong. Im still waiting for mine to come back and beg. I'll be really disappointed if he doesnt, as I really want the satisfaction of telling him where to go!

Well done Kirsty :)
Why do the weaselling bastards think that we'll fall for their bullshit?

Im still waiting for mine to come back and beg. I'll be really disappointed if he doesnt, as I really want the satisfaction of telling him where to go!

:) Go Skye, I hope you get your wish.

Has OW dumped him?

I love how predictable they are. Such an idiot. Glad you're not falling for it.

Kirsty, I have followed you threads too. Go off an have a lovely holiday with your DD and see it as the start of something new and wonderful.
Stay strong. Dont let him knock you off course.