Please tell me this doesn't happen in reality and I'm being silly

[Franziska]

I've just attended a conference / workshop in the US. On day 2 of the conference I met someone and we clicked instantly. We went for a long walk, and by day 4 we'd kissed. Basically, I'm head over heels in love, and they say they are too, and I believe. He's funny, smart and we just have amazing chemistry. I'm leaving to go back to the UK, but I'm so in love. He's agreed to visit me this summer. Is this crazy?

It feels so wonderful yet so illogical. Has anyone got any advice?

Just try to let your intuition be your guide, and enjoy it!

why shouldn't it happen in real life, who makes the rules? why dont you want it to be reality? sounds wonderful, good luck :-)

I'm trying to be logical, but I have honestly never met someone so wonderful. I'm pretty sure there's no wife, etc. He's so funny and so smart, and he gave me so much confidence (to the extent that some amazing professional things happened)

I'm sceptical that you can love someone that quickly. There's nothing wrong with lust though. Good luck :)

I would say that kind of instant "oh help, I'm in trouble here" feeling has happened to me once. I had a boyfriend at the time and couldn't pursue it but I did fall properly in love with the guy in question (not the boyfriend) over time as I got to know him, so there was something in my initial reaction.

Something did eventually happen between us, but alas, was not to be.

Good luck!

You will never know unless you let it play itself out. He might be perfect for you or the relationship might fizzle out. I think if you didn't give it a try you would regret it.

Depends on the bloke. Many EA fall in love very quickly and try to bind you in by swearing undying whatever. However, instant atttraction ("coup de foudre") also exists. It's just that you know very little about this person. If it were me, I would be inclined to take it very slowly, but then most people seem to have a more interesting life than I do.

I intend to give it a chance, I've been so happy, it's ridiculous

I fell in love with someone at first sight. He's now my DH of 13 years. Trust your instincts!

There was an instant attraction between me and my ex the moment we saw each other. The next time we saw each other we ended up getting together and we ended up very much in love. We were together 10 years. It didn't work out eventually, but hey, 10 years is a good innings and we're good friends now, he's like family to me. (no longer in love, more like a brother).

So, love at first sight does exist IMO!

Is there any reason why you shouldn't give him a chance? Eg one or both of you already has an official Partner/he has a long string of convictions for DV and/or drug abuse but he's going to change with Your Love oh yes indeed?

I'd say give it a go, if none of the above apply. You can always decide to pull the plug if it isn't working for you. But do be aware of all the classic red flags.

You kissed 2 days after you met? What did you do on the third day?

He's going to visit you 'this summer'? As it's already the end of June, I guess that means he'll fetch up on your doorstep within the next few days weeks.

If you're both unemcumbered there's nothing to lose. Go for it, but be aware that he may not be quite so appealing when you get to see him on your home turf.

I believe in love at first sight. I met Dp 5 months ago on a very rare night out. I had literally been dragged out by friends and so had he and we met in the smoking area of a pub (even though oddly enough neither of us smoke) and since that night we have only spent a day apart. He told me he loved me after our first proper date less then a week later and I felt exactly the same. These thing do happen. Have faith :)

24 years ago I met a man in a bar on holiday .
6 weeks later we were living together .
We have now been married for 12 years and have 2 DC .

It happens , just go with the flow and don't try to force it .

Happened to me and all my friends told me I was crazy (long distance too). He's DH now. Just go with it - it might not work and it might work. Life's too short to not give it a try.

This assumes that you are both single!

It took me and dh four days to decide to get married. We've now been together 12 years, married for 10 and have 3 dcs.

We are off for a dirty weekend in 10 days and I can't wait.

It does happen.

Let him come and visit you. You will know by the end of his visit and if it doesn't work you will never be left thinking 'if only'.

It does happen and I believe it's a soul mate thing. It happened to me 13 years ago and even though we are no longer together I still dream of him very often; he is ingrained in me. Good luck and go for it!

I fell for someone at first sight.

We have been married for 18yrs now. :) Good Luck!

Missed off half my post!

I went on to say that my now dh was on holiday in the UK from Australia. He met me & the time at which he was supposed to be heading back to Oz (for good) he went home, told his family all about & his intentions to stay in the UK with me, came back & we never looked back.

That was 6months into our relationship!

If you are both single, why not just see where it takes you! Good luck!

It happened here, too. Was visiting the UK to volunteer at a jamboree. MrScout is British/from the area of the jamboree and was also volunteering. We met on the first day of the jamboree (I'd been in the country less than a day and on-site less than an hour). We've been together nine years this summer, married seven years this autumn and have ToddlerScout who will be three this autumn.

It's hard work having a transatlantic relationship. It takes a lot of trust, patience, and computer & phone time. It's expensive flying back and forth to visit. But it's so worth it if you both want to try it. Since the day we met there has only been on day we haven't had some sort of communication whether that's email, phone, text or instant message and that's because I took my troop weekend camping and didn't have a mobile phone at the time to text him on the Saturday.

I'm a miserable old cynic, so I'm with SGB in saying don't let romance blind you to possible red flags, and whatever you do don't lend him any money ! Just follow the same guidelines you would with anyone you don't know very well, like the internet dating safety tips, and you can't go far wrong. Lifelong partnerships do sometimes happen from such sudden beginnings, and so also do very pleasant flings that ultimately don't go further but give you some great memories. No reason this can't be good, but always be careful, just because... well, just because.