Second call for all those with nowhere to be but in even if it is Saturday

[arthriticfingers]

Actually been out for the day with DD2 and planning pizza and 'House' with both DDs, so am ok.
Only rule for Saturday night threads is that no thread head room be given to thoughts of being losers! ;)

Your Saturday night sounds great actually, arthriticfingers

The weekend always take my by surprise, in a way. Though I know it's coming, and this happens every week more or less so I really shouldn't be.

I know I can have really fun and full weekends if I take the time to organise stuff in advance. But work is busy, and really, if I'm honest, I find it painful to think of plans, and then try and sell them to a selection of different friends, knowing that many/most/all will decline for reasons of their own. So I don't bother. And then I'm sad and lonely on Friday and Saturday evenings.

What I need to do is firmly resolve to make the effort to make weekend plans during the week, despite fear of rejection. And keep on making that effort week after week.

The thought of that still makes me want to hide, so I'm definitely not there yet.

Hiding is not allowed, either, HotDAMN ;)
Any and all activities are allowed - especially even walking the dog (any dog :)).
Watering the garden (when permitted by law ;))
Rule is: We are Cool!

Oh, I spent 4 hours walking the dog in a beautiful forest today, and tomorrow I have a hobby-day organised with 6 other lovely people. My insecurities are just brought out by social occasions - Friday and Saturday night drinks/parties/movies, and the organisation thereof. I know I'm fighting it well, since I have a large circle of friends and am seen as a social mover-and-shaker by all of them (ha ha!). But I just feel small and scared every. single. time. I put on my "social mover-and-shaker" hat. So I avoid it quite a lot of the time, and then kick myself.

We most definitely are cool.
But there's a gremlin inside who is very insistently whispering in my ear: "Well, who would want to hang out with me anyway?". It's a PITA.

Hand the gremlin!

Sorry HANG the gremlin - or, indeed, hand him to someone else to hang :)

It's part of me, though. I spent a long time telling it to STFU. Actually I think it wants love and cuddles.

Re: We Are Cool. I notice that lots of people do think that about me when I don't, and vice versa. Which leads me to think that they are all being misled by their own gremlins. Which is heart-warming and reassuring, in a way.

Shut it in on Saturday night?

better: tell IT to send out the invites. Prove itself wrong.

Cool :)
Done any theatre of the oppressed?
It works!

No - can you describe it? Just googled it, but their website and Wikipedia pay are clear as mud.

*page

It started in South America
It was/is a way of working through oppression avoiding violent revolution.
Trying out possible scenarios, within the safe confines of theatre.
It is quite eyeopening stuff.

[waves] in for reasons that are well known to you 2 lovely ladies.

tried my hardest this week to make contact with the world (am going crazy in my own head all the time)

all usual replies...yeah that would be great/nice/good.....but no-one here to share my pot of tea/wine/brownies

....would you like one...(passes round tray) they're quite nice though i say it myself......also / according to taste

Yes, please - to everything! :)

Quite like the sound of the theatre project (only get terrible stage friight so might have to volunteer for lighting/prompting duties...also can make costumes...but can't guess what would be appropriate). We could do an EA performance...a quiet revolution for the good of the soul!

Oh I'm taking my seat in this one. Saturday night, nearly always spent alone. There again so are most nights.

It is not performance focussed. Basically, one member of the group describes a situation where they feel oppressed. The group then ad libs possible solutions and analyses the successes or failures of the outcomes. Interestingly (although we know this), open antagonism is never the answer. Finding a comfort zone that may or may not be shared by the others (as they please) is.

Made fir us hen!

Hi Malory...brownie?

Sounds a little bit like a verbal self-defense class I did: one person describes a RL situation in which they felt verbally aggressed, then the situation gets acted out differently with the aggressed person playing the role of their aggressor, while the other group member plays the aggressed person's role, and proposes a verbal response that they think would have worked. You get a lot of creative responses you wouldn't have thought of yourself.

Yes, creativity is often the solution, and working with people who have had the problem explained to them helps enormously.
I did the course as part of a teaching course many many years ago, I never used my my own feelings of oppression, but just looking at solutions which had been worked out in a group was liberating.
I wonder whether half our problems could be halved if more people just understood the problem?

...you only aim to solve a quarter of our problems?

Understanding is key.
As you know, some are incapable of empathising with others, though.

So I would say that problems like oppression can only stop when the oppressors stop doing the oppressing already. The response of the person on the receiving end really has little to do with it.

yes but the oppressed can (sometimes) move themselves away (either physically or mentally) thus reducing the oppressors power and reach.

oh absolutely.
Not possible in all situations, sadly.

en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Theatre_of_the_Oppressed
Here is my pet bug bear Wiki.
As I understood it - way w back in the day
The Theatre of the Oppressed aimed to offer alternative ways to freedom when the oppressor would not (and we all know they will not) change.
One difference, though, is that it addressed individual feelings of oppression by the ruling group.
However, the more I try for freedom, the more I feel that women victim blaming is one big part of our problem.

foolon hi..yes brownies always go down well. thank you.
I've got some if anyone wants a drop - or a gallon!