Husband is cheating on me and out 3 month old daughter

[char222]

Shortly after my DD was born my husband had to move to another part of the country for his job. We were supposed to be moving with him, but delays mean i have been on my own for the last 10 weeks.

Since he has moved away he has shown no interest in our daughter, and shown me no support even though he knows i have found it hard being on my own.

I have since found out that he has been texting a girl at his new workplace saying things like how much he wants to kiss her. They have also been planning a trip together. He even texted her ""goodnight sweetheart xx" whilst in bed with me! When confronted he said that since the birth of DD the spark has gone from our marriage.

I can't believe how selfish he is being. I am unsure whether our marriage is worth saving, but the thought of being a single parent terrifies me. Has anyone else been in a similar situation??

No t read not funny. Your popping up. Is.

Lol. Leave him!

What a cunt charmer!

For me, his actions show an alarming lack of respect, love and consideration when you need it most (i.e. coping with a new baby, mostly alone). When he says the "spark" has gone, does he really mean "sex"? If so, that alone says volumes about his priorities.

I'm sorry, I know it must be a scary prospect with a newborn baby but - honestly - if he thinks so little of you and your daughter that he can feel justified in his actions then you will both be much better off without him.

My cock of an ex did similar after the birth of our DD2. I found a text on his phone that he had sent to OW saying: 'When am I going to feel your soft lips around my cock?'
I wasted 2 years 'trying to make it work'.
Now I have a 12 week old DD with an amazing man who spends time on our relationship instead of actively encouraging cock sucking from external sources. I have discovered that it is perfectly possible to have a great postnatal sex life when both partners make the effort.

I won't lie to you. It's bloody hard ending a marriage. Bloody worth it though under these circumstances.
Don't waste any more time on this fuckwit. You and your little one are worth so much more.

Who in their right mind would tell the op to make it work though? She has no support,he shows no interest in their new baby and is cheating.

Op I remember thinking i would rather be dead when my cheatin ex left me with 4 dc one a baby.

I swear to you it was one of the happiest times of my life once id got sorted.

On my death bed most of my best memories will be from the years I was by myself and finally lived my life to the full,please dont be scared.

Never underestimate the power of taking control of things.

You have coped alone with a newborn baby,you my friend can do anything.

lumbago I shall make that choice for you, fool, since you seem incapable of doing it yourself

lol

Texts are perilous with marriage. Too easily sent

Aw anyfucker.

OP i hope you make the right decision for you and your baby and good luck my thoughts are with you
anyfucker and lunbago this is NOT your bitchfest thread this is about a woman going through a really rough time in her life,she doesn't need to be reading you fighting

Thanks for all your messages. I never expected to get so many. Funny old worlds where you get more support from virtual strangers than those supposed to be closest to you!

What AF and HereIGo said.

(even the deleted bit whatever that was)

How are you today Char? How have you left things with your H?

It looks like DH may be suffering from post natal depression. Although that doesn't excuse everything it does go someway to explaining it. Fingers crossed that things work themselves out when we all move in together.

When you all move in together??

You're staying with the cheating scum then are you.? You've pretty much given him the green light to do it again.

Good luck with that life then.

Oh god. Men don't get post natal depression. Men get post natal 'oh bollocks this is a bit different, I don't like all this change, I think I might go out on the piss and forget about the baby and my wife, fuck 'em' syndrome.

OK I am being facetious, but his being depressed after the birth of your baby does NOT excuse his cruel and callous treatment of you. How on earth can he be 'depressed' anyway? He is in another part of the country chatting up some bird.

My dd was 3 months old when her father decided that 'he was not ready for parenthood'. So off he went with a girl from work. It was utterly miserable, and I really feel for you in a similar situation, as of course you want better for your baby. But this bloke has acted like a complete arse. You and your baby can do so much better.

Lol! What? He has pnd.....righto. He's already checked out and told you the sparks gone.

Good luck, as he won't bin her and there will be more. He's told you who he is and where he's at....

Post-natal depression??!!
Well I've heard shagging around called a few things in my time but never PND.
Someone pointed out earlier that lol'ing on a tread like this was inappropriate. However, PND takes the
Think will upgrade to a ROFL.
By the way, which esteemed medic diagnosed this?

Fingers crossed that things work themselves out when we all move in together.

Op you might need to get real here. You've just had a child - one of the biggest things that will ever happen in your life - with someone who's supposed to be a life partner, and he's not only told you it's gone for him, but he's texting another woman in your bed?!

Anyone justifying that behaviour has v low self-esteem imo.

Good luck because you'll really need it :(

oh dear

not much more to say here, really

char222 he's really not. I promise you. He really is not suffering from post natal depression.

Don't move up there with him just yet. Be supportive from your own home. Don't leave where you are now and where you know to go and stay with him. At least wait until he sorts himself out and takes action on growing up and proving to you that he's not sleeping with his colleague (which he really is, I'm sorry) addressing his postnatal depression.