Is there anything wrong with this Facebook Conversation between DP and 'girl from work'?

[GuiltyParty]

I don't want to be the almighty Miss Paranoia but I've just stumbled across this facebook conversation. DP was at my house last night and was using my laptop. He must have closed it down without logging out of facebook and not realised he would still be logged in next time I opened it up again. I admit, I was nosy when it opened on his profile and so looked at his private messages (a bit of history here with innapropriate texting of a girl from work last year, hence the nosyness). So anyway I'll just repeat part of the convo here and you can tell me if I'm being a nutter or not.

Mark: hi Laura thanks for the birthday message , hows you ? xx

Laura: hey Mark, no problem
i am good thanks how are you?

Mark: im good thanks

Laura:good good

Mark: your looking very well in your photos

Laura: awww thankyou i am worried that i have put weight on lol

Mark: you look gorg as always , not same at work with out you

Laura: awww thanks Mark, you do know how to make me feel good

Mark: Yay :) :) hows Work? how long do you have left over there?

Laura: its going good thanks, was supposed to finish in June but staying another 6 months as I like it here

Mark: right i got to go back to work, you keep bing your gorgous and bubbly best, chat again xxxx

Laura: thanks hun take care speak soon xxxxxx

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This is a girl he previously admitted to fancying and bought her a birthday present last year behind my back. I know the convo doesn't sound that bad but is it normal for men to give some OTT compliments about appearance to women from work? This girl is currently in Japan btw.
Previous conversation between the two of them involve no mention of me and when she asked how things are in England, he replied "Same shit, different day". When she left we'd broken up and he told her this. Would it now not be appropriate to mention that we'd got back together since she left?

Or am I being paranoid?

I'm 30, he's 40. I don't think she's a threat at all, that isn't my concern. What bothers me is all the underhand flirting and sneaking around in private messages. He has done this before with a woman he knew from school. 2 years ago, again no mention of me, lots of kisses and nicknames and outright lying when she asked why he'd gone offline quick. He said his computer had crashed - actually, I'd walked in the room
And then he did it AGAIN with a different woman just after christmas.
Leanne - "so what you upto at weekend? x"
Mark - "I'm off out around Manchester!"
Leanne - "oo party animal haha"
Mark - "oh yes!"

Erm - he was actually going to see a show with me in Manchester. Why did he distort this to make it sounds like he was going "Out with the lads" (in context of the rest of the convo he'd made out as if he was going out with the lads).

hear hear Maryz

He's 40?!?!?!?

Oh ffs, he sounds like an arse. Unless he has some astonishingly redeeming features that you've not told us about, get rid.

you do not trust him walk away now.

And a wee bit of drip feeding going on, not saying you are doing it deliberetly just saying as others have done the context is important

agree with notthefullshilling, and maryz.

I've commented upthread but reading it again, his comments sound a bit Gok Wan-ish? He's not a camp 'style guru' is he? :)

So glad I'm single.

He fancies Laura.
Laura thinks he's a dick. Like we do.

Ah, well there's a thought fluffi. Whatever his excuse, he is an arse.

And 40 isn't middle aged, Maryz

He sounds like a nob, run away!

Blunt but true Bucharest.

Life expectancy figures for people in the UK now stand at 82.6 years for women, and 78.4 years for men.

so 40 is def middle aged. sorry

Don't move in with him.

Even if you're completely wrong and he's just being a bit inappropriate without having the wits to work out why, it sounds just like too much hard work. And everything you've said paints a picture of a bit of a tosser who is maintaining the "free and single/bit of a lad" persona quite deliberately.

There are two issues here; one that's quite straightforward and one less so.

He is trying to be unfaithful with anyone who rises to the bait. He is not especially discerning about who she is. His only requirement is that she's got a pulse and is willing. So you need to get rid.

The less straightforward issue is how you got to the point where you thought this was all you were worth and that you actually thought this morning that you were being unreasonable and paranoid. Some therapy after dumping him, perhaps?

Bottom line, he's A Bit Of A Nob.

And you don't trust him

which means you don't really respect him

and at some point, he's going to cheat

...why not just dump???

You're 30!!

I would bet a week's wages that if you stay with him, you 40 year old self will wish you hadn't bothered.

your

If I was Laura or Leanne I'd think he was just an old perv trying it on.
They clearly don't seem to be interested in him.
But one day he will flirt with someone who reciprocates. Then you are in trouble.
If I saw this in my DP's inbox I wouldn't be too bothered tbh, but then we have no history of him hiding things like you do.
I had a similar message from a guy I went to school with and I showed DP and we had a good laugh about it. That's the difference, its all a bit sneaky.
And I would like to clarify that 40 is the new 30 and absolutely NOT middle aged!!!!!

An old perv at 40?!?!?! It gets worse

To be fair, a 40yo buzzing around women almost 20 years his junior does make him an old perv I suppose. By comparison, that is

Your DP is a flirt, he is NOT a keeper. Avoid avoid avoid. Not marriage material.
Ditch Ditch Ditch

I'm glad you don't feel threatened though, OP. Because a woman who has the wherewithal to secure a job in Japan at 23 is unlikely to find a 40yo supermarket employee enticing, unless he has something truly spectacular to offer (and considering he wrote the line "you look gorg as always , not same at work with out you," this seems unlikely).

I would be if anyone called me "gorg"
Maybe he can't spell gorgeous!!!

Jenai - I meant old perv as in a 40 year old perving on a 20 something, not that 40 is old!!!!