Would like to read people's thoughts on this..

[Derpette]

Just reading a topic then which included a woman being angry about her husband watching porn - and confronting him about it.

What's your stance on it? Do you 'ban' your other half from watching it? Do you let it slide or maybe you enjoy it with him/her?

Personally I dont see any harm. It's natural in my eyes. If fella rather did watch it alone I wouldn't mind. And I enjoy watching it from time to time with him. Dunno if that's openmindedness or weird...?

Sorry if someone of you disapprove if the subject matter but hey ho.

No, I wouldn't ban a DP from watching porn, but I would take habits like that into consideration prior to having a serious relationship.

This topic has been done to death.

There are so many threads on relationships where this has been discussed extensively.

allthequeensmen - apologies I'm new here. But I'm sure other new people haven't read of contributed to the old topics so...

Fine if it bothers you that much ask Mumsnet to delete it then.

I would not want my DH to use porn as It is degrading among other reasons.

I think it is understandable to be aroused while watching people having sex but I have learnt enough from various threads on here to not be casual about watching porn.

IMO the industry is vile for both men and women.

DH works away alot and may watch porn, it is not something we would share together. Disclaimer: DH has watched and probably will watch again, this makes me very uncomfortable.

It's great to hear some Mnetters who don't mind. I don't mind at all. In fact I quite like watching it myself sometimes! It's one of those things where I feel I'm missing some kind of outraged gene, as I have read things on here where women are threatening to leave their partners over it and all sorts. I used to write erotic stories for a porn mag when I was a student and me and all my bfs before as well as my husband now have always watched it both with me and without me. It's just pictures- and there's something for everyone if you look around, its not just for men. I think maybe its a generational thing or a open mindedness thing.

Just to clarify I didn't mean "DH may watch porn" to mean I have "allowed it", just meant he might watch porn.

Porn is not "natural" , sex and masturabtion is natural and porn is not representative of good sex.

Most porn is also hugely abusive towards women and the porn industry is vile, with most performers hooked on drugs and alcohol, STIs are rife and women are often physically damaged by the acts that are performed on them.

Not all men use porn and some see it for the nasty and misogynistic shit it is.
HTH.

It isnt .banned', no, but I couldnt have a serious relationship with a man who had a porn habit.

My DH has no interest in porn whatsoever, which suits me fine. I think porn exploitative and the explosion of porn on the internet is incredibly damaging to women, and warps male sexuality.

I didnt always think ike this. I had a relationship with a man who was a heavy porn user and I totally bought in to the 'its normal andhealthy and men just cant help it' spiel, not to mention the 'but I am an emancipated, sexually adventurous woman, not a prude, so whats not to like?' spiel.

I wokeu eventually.

I woke up

Yeah dictionarydiva I almost feel as though I'm lacking something as a woman because I don't feel outrage at this? I'm very open about sexual things and think these matters are taken far too seriously.

One of my friends is in the business, that may sway my judgement?

Just ti add, dictionary, I am not outraged because I am shocked. DH and I have a a far from vanilla sex life. I a outraged because I dont like supporting anindustry thatis so deeply misogynistic. HTH

I think a lot of women blame their aversion to porn on how the women are apparently treated. Not all, but some.

And Magsaloof, just because youve had a bad experience with someone who watches porn does that mean everyone will be the same?

I'm genuinely interested by the way when I'm asking these questions. Im just trying to understand why women are so against it. At first I thought it was jealousy or prudishness? But I underdtand there's much more to it

Saying that those who object to porn are closed minded and not sexually open is not likely to win you any respect on here as it's lazy and patently untrue.

There is a very wise saying " Love sex = Hate porn".

You'll be saying we're all frigid old hags next.

I don't have a problem with porn and use it myself. However if it started to interfere with our sex life it would become a problem.

I had a thread not so long ago about it in aibu.

I can't remember the name of the documentary but it was about a British woman going to LA to advance her career in porn. It was horrific and made me read and understand the anti-porn argument.

Infact, it informed me of a whole world of horror I really hadn't thought of before.

malificence - please don't put words into my mouth. I said that maybe I am MORESO open that others. Not that people against it aren't open.

And as a note, I'm not here to earn Internet kudos, I don't need your respect. And I mean that in the nicest way possible.

electricsoftparade - what was the name of it I'd love to watch that! I've heard such conflicting things. Like my friend who works in this industry loves it. She says it makes her feel powerful as a woman (?) and she likes earning money doing something she loves.

I wouldn't want to be with a man who got off on the filmed ( and often violent ) abuse of women, which a great deal of internet porn actually is.

The damaging myth about porn is that all men use it, basically can't function without it and women just have to put up and shut up with something they are deeply uncomfortable about.

I'm sorry but I can't remember the name. I'm sure someone will be able to give the name of it.

It does not make pleasant viewing.

I wouldn't mind as long as it wasn't replacing sex in our relationship IYSWIM

i don't use porn for the same reasons i don't buy diamonds who source i can't ascertain. it's a shitty, ugly industry where human beings are degraded on a daily basis, so i don't want my money funding it.

there is no such thing as "fair trade" pornography. it is impossible to discern whether or not a piece of porn was produced in a non-exploitative environment. so why would i want to look at something that's basically just sexual abuse? that's not sexy, it's shit and a bit pathetic really.

my DH knows how i feel about porn and agrees with me.
if i found him using porn, i'd be disgusted. i haven't banned it though, it's his choice, he knows how i feel about it and his actions are his own affair.

it doesnt bother me if he watches it. We sometimes watch it together.Occasionally/rarely i watch it/look at it alone.
I suspect he probably uses it a couple of times a week. I dont feel threatened by it in the slightest and i dont think it has any effect on our relationship.