Am I a humourless bint

[KittyAnne]

...to find my FIL 'encouraging' my DP to cheat on me really fucking awful?

He's doing it in a supposedly jokey way. Nudge nudge wink wink shit.

For example, an attractive woman has moved in next door to PILs and FIL was telling DP to go and say hello- 'yeah go and get to know her son heh heh heh'.

This happens a lot.

I'm NOT being paranoid. When I called him on his comments the last time he laughed and said 'oh I was wondering when you'd jump in'.

I'm not a jealous, possessive person. I don't set myself up for these kind of comments. He doesn't do it to my BIL.

I'm not massively confident. Baby body et al. I should just ignore him but I find him generally an insensitive prick but thankfully, DP isn't like him.

DP doesn't respond to his comments.

Any chance you could start suggesting to your MiL that she meets up with anyone that's moved in near your house?

Urgh. Feel sorry for your mil, what kind of shit does she put up with from this charming man?

FIL sounds like a disrespectful twat. Probably the kind of bloke that upon hearing his son had cheated on his partner would sit there saying "that's my boy!" or "get in there my son!"

You are not being humourless because there is simply no humour to be had in his comments.

your fil is obviously spending too much time in the seventies...the 1970s

and your dp want to strap on a pair and tell him ho offensive he is being.

how, not ho!

Yeah, it really gets my goat. I'm quite opinionated forthright generally and I think he thinks this is the only way he can get to me.

I find it massively inappropriate.

Seriously temped to hire a hot stripper for MIL's 70th :o

Next time just say "He'll have to get through me first - she's my kind of lady, I wonder if she'd be up for some woman on woman action? What do you think?"

Judging by his "wonder when you'd jump in" comment, I'd say he's doing it for a reaction. It's hard, but try not to give him one.

Or yeah, tell him you already know she doesn't go for men, nudge nudge, wink wink!

you need a pithy put down that you apply each and every time he does it.

Say ' gosh you do sound your age' every time he says anything along those lines.

I think I would have more chance with hot neighbour than DP anyway.....

:o

Dropdeadfred I think your suggestion is brilliant.

Dropdead- would it be bad of me to add 'you wrinkly old git' to that?

Every time your FIL does this you need to come up with a comment that stings him where it hurts and makes him look like a dirty old man.

Try something along the lines of 'O you are a card FIL - wishing you were 40 years younger, eh? or 'Regretting your lost opportunities? Too late now, isn't it?' said in a very lighthearted and jokey manner.

Or go for 'Goodness me FIL, still got sex on the brain at your age? Bit of a silver fox on the quiet, aren't you. Ho, ho ho.'

You can get away with making outrageous comments about the behaviour of others if you paste a big smile on your face and use a good-humoured tone of voice.

"did you mean to sound like a sexist buffoon?"

each and every time

"who invited bernard manning?"

(finally came up with one)

"has Benny Hill been dug up?"

LOLs

These are all going in the bank

YADNBU

Loving the responses - please make sure you use at least one in real life!

That's a heavy gun for an IL situation, AF... unless intended as the opening salvo to permanent hostilities

YucK!

Offensive on 2 levels:

1. That he's think it acceptable for his son to betray his wife
2. That he wants you to get upset

Not to mention his appallingly lacking sense of humour.

Feel free to edit/add anything you want ... But I think saying it with a concerned yet patronising look on your face is the way to go... Maybe even a little pat on the shoulder as you walk past him!!

My Fil used to say to Dh if we were all out and about and we passed some pregnant women, I see DH has been busy.......Twat!

"Bit TOO young for you to consider for yourself then?"

"You're too old to be in the running then?"

"Can't get it up yourself anymore then?"

"I can give you a website address that says it can supply viagra if you're still that interested"