Anhyone got any positive stories about being pushing fifty and finding a lovely man?

[nkf]

Feel sooooo old.
Been separated for a while now. Tempted to try. But so nervous. How likely is it that a frumpy old thing like me will find a partner?

My godmum went through a very difficult divorce around fifteen years ago. It was horrible for her and her kids, and for several years she struggled with work, children, legal wrangles and the terrible hurt of her marriage ending. She (and I'm not being cruel) put on weight, stopped having time to take care of herself, and seemed exhausted and defeated, and worked endlessly to keep the household together.

Things gradually got easier, and she began to recover. She started to look better, and feel better, and meet new people and set up her own business. About six years (when she would have been around fifty) ago she met a wonderful man, and two years later, married him.

I saw her after she'd come back from honeymoon, and realised how much she'd changed since the divorce. She looked AMAZING, - trim, toned, tanned, sleek, and very, very happy. I've never seen someone so clearly 'restored' to herself, - she looked a million dollars. Part of that is the experiences and strength she has developed over the past few years. And part of it is her new husband. He is a wonderful man, who adores her and also her three children and grandchildren.

So it does happen

I was 41 (am now 42) when I found my lovely man.

My friend got married at 52 and had met her lovely man when she was 48.

It can and does happen.

I was 46 when I met DH, 48 when we married. My only regret is that I didn't meet him 30 years earlier, but I guess I had to work through the drunks, the commitmentphobes, the mummy's boys and all the others first.

A friend married for the first time at 48. She met her DH on a blind date set up by a neighbour. They found they'd been to school together and Bob's your uncle.

Yes, yes, yes, it can be done!

D

Stop calling yourself frumpy for a start!! Paint your nails blackred, get a haircut and spend some money on clothing woman!!!

My surrogate mother met her partner when she was pushing 50. Thought she'd never meet anyone, the usual. She is tiny and pretty and Mumsy and was a nurse / hairdresser for old people, loves cooking, is warm and loving. He is tall and funny and does Dad dancing and tells jokes and play with the dogs. They are a grand couple. I used to hear them having sex and he used to smack her bottom when she was making breakfast when they were first together!

My lovely Stepmum met my Dad when she was in her early fifties, and they are very happy :)

They met through a hobby

I married my DW when I was 54 and she was 57. We know many others who have done something similar.

My grandma found someone in her seventies and remarried, my mother also has started relationships in her fifties and sixties. It is possible if it is what you want, although the one thing both of them say is that they love their own homes and wouldn't give them up for just anybody. Both have turned down interested men on this basis, the thought of picking up someone's socks is not that thrilling.

Another positive story here from someone who was pushing 50 from the other side (in fact we met about 10 days after my 50th birthday!

Fat: check
Frumpy: check
Perfectly ahppy on my own: check

Seven years on, still f and f but blissfully sharing my space with someone else.

If it can happen to me ther's hope for everyone.

Girlfriend haul your sorry ass out there!

Did I really say that?

How likely is it that a frumpy old thing like me will find a partner? Oh love, I know it's a cliche but that is such a sad way to describe yourself and you need to find a way to build up your self esteem and start to feel confident about yourself. Prioritise yourself, treat yourself and yes, start to do things that make you feel good. Then you can start asking 'How likely is it I will find a partner worthy of me!'.

To answer your question, I do know several success stories of love that started in the 50's.

50s

Yes Helen you may well blush!!!!

My Gran was 80 when she married her second husband.

Talking of punctuation, this had me shielding my eyes

I used to hear them having sex and he used to smack her bottom

My great aunt was widowed at 60 and then met another lovely man at 65 and got engaged at 70 and they had a great time for about ten years, sadly they have both passed away now, but love can come at any age

I'm 50 my bf is a couple of years older than me. He is very eligible and is used to younger, fitter, women trying to tie him down. We are dating and he has admitted to finding a new lease of life with me :) Not saying we will be getting hitched anytime soon though!

More! More stories!

There must be a few frumpy old men out there looking for frumpy 50 year old ladies. Whats not right, to make you frumpy? Do you look like Les Dawson dressed as a woman? (please don't get offended by my comments) but there is hope for us all, it's just not that easy to find that one person to turn a spark , into a full blown fire.

Yes I believe there is every chance of finding a nice man.But you have to get out there, don't turn down an invitation, be brave and do something different.Maybe a holiday on your own or something you have always wanted to do,like a class ,dance lessons ,the gym,whatever puts you in contact with new people .Have a look at online dating, I havn't had success there ,but others swear by it. Don't have a strict checklist,you may find a younger man or someone who is not your usual type a very pleasant surprise.good luck

Thank you everyone. I feel quite teary at the thought of the seventy year olds finding love. And, yes, I do know that my self esteem is way below it should be. That's what a bad marriage does to you.

i left an abusive man, and some months later met (totally by chance, he changed a flat tyre for me) a lovely lovely man. I was 46 and he 48. Both divorced. We live together now, with my 3 children and he is a fabulous father to my boys and a wonderful, loving partner to me. so yes, yes ,yes can definitely happen!

My brother met his wife when they were 43 (him) and 45 (her). Second marriage for both of them. They are the loves of each other's lives.

My mum was widowed at 50, met a new chap at 60 and they are hapilly together as she approaches seventy.

My mum met her lovely husband in her late 40's and is very, very happy still.

Great stories here. Very inspiring for you OP

I'm not ready for the dating game again yet but at the moment I think I am going to be incredibly fussy next time round. That's probably not a good way to start off.

I'm going to be very different the second time around. I'm glad I have my lovely children but, lord, I should never have married my husband.

A friend's dad met someone, and they went out a few times. He took her home, but expressed concern about driving distances in the dark. Her reply was "Well, Arthur, I've got a lovely double bed, it's a shame for it to go to waste!"

They are both in their 80s