Guardian soulmates - is it just me who can't understand what everyone is on about?

[nkf]

I had a look. Just tentatively thinking I might, just might, one day, consider trying a bit of online dating.

So I take a look at Guardian Soulmates. Is every man on there a frustrated poet? I wasn't sure what half of them were on about.

I can't even parody what they were saying. It was all so odd.

Is it just me?

Oh one more thing - I have a friend who met her other half through 'mysinglefriend.com' She's now getting married, bought a house etc. could that be an option?

Any yes - it was me who did the friend's profile - have a look and you'll see what I mean.

.

I find they wildly exaggerate their own charms.

One more thing, I really can't bear to put a photo up. I just can't. How bad would it be to put a picture of a celebrity up and say that people say I look like her. Or used to look like her. Or something like that. It's not a ravishing celebrity or anything like that. I mean surely those moody pics on Guardian Soulmates can't be true either.

You have to have a photo, 99% won't bother even clicking on your profile if you don't.

The 1% that do will be the Nigerian Lurve Scammers.

No, no,no.

commit to it.

I never contacted or replied to anyone without a photo. Putting a photo up shows you're genuine and serious about meeting someone.

But a picture not of me but not pretending that it is me. And genuinely looks a bit like me. Wheedling hopefully.

NO!

What's the best that can happen from that?

They get something to look at. Dunno really. Just can't face putting a photo up.

But that can only ork for so long, then you'd either have to come clean or 'break up' before meeting.

No way would I meet any man who did that. It's too dodgy. I'd think he was married.

Guardian SM is the Guardian reading demographic, so why be surprised if they are in media and are left footed?

Some of the responses on here are writing off everyone on there; that's harsh and ill-informed. I know lots of GSM success stories- all very unwankerish people. (But all of them left wing media types!)

Match.com has such annoying TV adverts that I can only imagine it's full of wankers.

What about eHarmony? The questionnaire is very long but it seems to have success.

Oh and no photo- no dates!

You don't get that poncey rubbish on POF. My best ever POF approach was 'I wanna smash your back doors in hun. Txt me'

ps - there is NO point in online dating if you don't have a picture up. It's 2012, not 1952. I blocked all messages from people without photos - you wouldn't walk into a bar with a bag on your head and expect people to talk to you.....

Have you thought of www.burkabride.com?

Strapline "It's really what's on the inside that counts"

Would solve your photo-dilemma (Sounds like Blue Jeans in the 70's)

scarlettpimpernel has it right. If you're an agnostic leftie who loves stealth boasting about your amazing taste in black and white film, indie music and Thai condiments then Guardian Soulmates is the place to be. (Bike also essential; extra points for living in a houseboat or converted railway carriage.)

But yes, photo essential, otherwise everyone assumes you're married. Yes, you may embarrassingly encounter your colleagues on there, but hey, it will be no more embarrassing for you than them.

So.....no one likes my poem then?

I'd date you for that alone Strawberry

Does left wing and arty preclude a sense of humour, d'ya think?

I'm not surprised that they are media-ish and left wing. I'm surprised they write such odd stuff. Lord knows I'm a poncey enough North Londoner but I have some restraint when it comes to the written word. I don't think I'd post a profile that sounds as if I've been smoking dope.

Like the sound of burkabride.com.

And, KatieScarlett, I love you for the Blue Jeans reference.

Is Match.com the advert on the train station? I think it's cute but very young.

KatieScarlett, very funny.

OP, why don't you look at a few different newspapers, they have daters similar in demographics to their readers (so don't bother with the Telegraph obviously). Or look online, or what about a dating agency?

Why are you worried about your looks? I am not very photogenic, so I know how you feel, but you could get a friend to take some pics/go to a studio and put up the best shot. I don't think you can go ahead without one (although I do know of a dating agency where they used to send people on proper blind dates as they said chemistry didn't really come through a photo).

Well, I'm a bit of a Guardian reader so that was my first thought.

I tried Match, no matches absolute shit. Try POF yep you do get chancres and messers but no less than in real life and only seems so many as there are so many on there, plus its free.

I take a terrible photo. Really horrible. And I'm embarrassed in case someone I knew in RL spotted me.

But if someone in RL spotted you it's because they're also single and online dating.

Also, if you're heterosexual you're looking for men, so wouldn't see any females on there. Any male friends you know who are on there can just be politely avoided.