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Original poster

Rachel Cusk - why is she having to support her dh following her divorce?

157 replies

mrsreplicant · 19/02/2012 00:04

Sorry to be naive - have never done divorce myself. She seems to be saying that because her dh gave up his job to look after the dc, she will always have to support him now that they are divorced/ing. [?] From what I read, it sounds like she will have to support him even after the dc are grown up.

Can anyone elaborate?

OP posts:
ImperialBlether · 19/02/2012 00:06

I suppose it would be the same for a woman who gave up work. If you have a pattern of behaviour, eg SAHM, then after a divorce you can argue that pattern should continue. That's the problem with an agreement like that - you might not mean "and you shall never work again" but some people may take it that way.

bellabelly · 19/02/2012 00:07

Isn't it just the same as the "traditional" divorce settlement, where a woman would have taken time out of her career to bring up the young children, thus suffering loss of earnings, loss of career dev't/promotion opportunities, etc? In effect, allowing the working partner to pursue his career by providing all the childcare, looking after the domestic responsibilities, etc?

Original poster
mrsreplicant · 19/02/2012 00:07

Hmmm.

Confused
OP posts:
Original poster
mrsreplicant · 19/02/2012 00:09

Again forgive my naivety, but I thought the obligation to provide for a SAHM wife stopped when all the dc left education. And didn't continue for the rest of the wife's life?

OP posts:
PoohBearsHole · 19/02/2012 00:14

I think in some circumstances it can, however if they remarry this changes.

izzyizin · 19/02/2012 00:45

Every case is different, but in particulary acrimonious disputes a shit hot divorce rottweiler lawyer is worth their weight in gold. Unfortunately, their weight in gold is roughly equivalent to their fees.

Bogeyface · 19/02/2012 02:01

If she has alot of money and he has a good lawyer then yes, he could end up with a negotiated agreement of spousal maintenance (alimony) paid until he either co-habits or re-marries.

troisgarcons · 19/02/2012 03:28

The husband is a lawyer

MooncupandPizza · 19/02/2012 03:48

The argument is that the SAHP enabled the working-out-of-the-home parent to develop the career to the extent that they have and, therefore, is entitled to share in that success.

So, if her husband had not given up his career to mind the kids, she would not have got to where she is now. Therefore, he gets to share some of her financial success having contributed to it having sacrificed his own career.

MooncupandPizza · 19/02/2012 03:50

He could argue that his career is affected forever by his decision to support the family by being a SAHD and therefore her support should be forever too, I would think. But yes, a good lawyer would be necessary.

pondering If he represented himself (and i have no idea if he did or not!), could the judge argue that clearly he can still hold his own in court and get work that way and therefore his successful lawyerness do him out of a fat settlement instead of sorting it for him! ;)

izzyizin · 19/02/2012 05:18

As Ms Cusk's article revealed, he's a 'qualified lawyer' Mooncups and he certainly wouldn't have made the the mistake of representing himself Grin

Mind you, all that time at home would have provided him with ample opportunity to research relevant case law and this no doubt reduced his legal team's fees - which, I suspect, are being paid for by his ex.

Toadinthehole · 19/02/2012 05:32

I imagine that having a lawyer's qualification amounts to little if one hasn't practiced for x number of years. Ex-husband would probably be competing with graduates for jobs. Not only that, but grads might get the nod over him because of his age.

izzyizin · 19/02/2012 05:33

Re your 'pondering'; the judges in disputed divorce cases act as referees adjudicators between the two opposing sides and bang their gavels down on points of law after hearing and considering all of the evidence and arguments that are put before the Court.

I would hazard a guess that his side argued that had he not sacrificed his career on the altar of SAHPhood he'd be a senior partner earning megabucks in some fancy city firm or a high-flying QC earning even more megabucks in chambers a la Ms Bliar Booth or Mr Swirlylocks Mansfield.

From the size of the award, it seems that Ms Cusk is not short of a bob or two. I've only recently realised that journalism can be an extremely high paid little number.

PeelingmyselfofftheCeiling · 19/02/2012 05:44

Journalism is definitely not normally well paid, certainly compared to being lawyer, think there might be more to this than meets the eye.

Foxinsocks · 19/02/2012 05:47

Most journalists, if not the majority, don't earn well believe me! And loads are losing their jobs at the moment. Columnists tend to make a lot more.

I don't know why it surprises you op. Isn't it exactly what would happen with a sahm who had given up a career and a good lawyer on your side? I've also not been divorced but know of several women who have got this type of settlement.

angienoyce · 19/02/2012 05:54

Is there anyone there to talk too, my husband of 18years has left me 7 hours ago for another woman and I don't now what to do

izzyizin · 19/02/2012 06:13

You could earn some extra money by writing an article about it and donate the proceeds to a lawyer who specialises in divorce and family law, OR (recommended) you could start your own thread so that those who've been where you are and know what you're going through can rally round and give you all the help and support you need, angie.

izzyizin · 19/02/2012 06:15

Just go to 'start new thread', honey, and you'll find that help is at hand.

prh47bridge · 19/02/2012 07:44

The courts generally prefer clean break settlements these days but spousal maintenance is still an option where one spouse earns significantly more than the other. In determining the amount, the needs of the lower income spouse are considered along with their earnings, both actual and potential. It can be for a fixed term or for life. It automatically ends when the recipient remarries. It does not automatically end when the recipient cohabits but it is open to either party to go back to the courts and ask for it to be varied if circumstances change.

ameliagrey · 19/02/2012 08:42

Cusk is primarliy a novelist not a journ. Her earnings will have come from her books.

Every case is different. My friend, who has ben a stay at home wife and supported a high flying mega-bucks earning DH, - no kids- was told that if they divorced ( she'd initiate it on grounds of UB) she would receive a large sum or maintenance for roughly 2 years to enable her to get back onher feet financially.

In the case of Cusk maybe her DH has missed the legal boat and he will never be able to earn much for along time,as a lawyer- if he has never really worked, he'd be starting like a 22 yr old.

ameliagrey · 19/02/2012 08:44

As a by the way, i found her article ( which is an extract from her book on her marriage break up) very irritating- all me, me, me and very bitter/negative.

Bogeyface · 19/02/2012 12:14

Can someone link to the article please?

izzyizin · 19/02/2012 13:05

Here you go Bogey: www.guardian.co.uk/lifeandstyle/2012/feb/17/rachel-cusk-divorce-the-aftermath but if I were you I'd invest the time in a more rewarding pursuit than reading this pretentious twaddle.

TheFoosa · 19/02/2012 13:15

I bet her husband hates her even more after that article

Frizzbonce · 19/02/2012 14:09

I've always found Rachel Cusk a very humourless writer who mistakes self-absorption for self-knowledge. She also slagged off a very good friend of mine's book - yes I know - you write a book and you're fair game for bad reviews but still . . . .

'The first time I saw my husband after the separation I realised he hated me'. That'll be lovely for her daughters to read about their father.