I feel for you. My husband announced in April that he wanted to leave and moved out 4 weeks later,after 21 years together. I was absolutely devastated and couldn't imagine life without him. My dad also passed away during that four weeks, my husband had known he was very ill and close to death and he must have realised it was going to be the worst possible time for me to cope, but obviously his own 'needs' were paramount. He moved out 3 days before my father's funeral.
The first time I went for 'A Night Out' was august. It was only a drink in a local pub with two 'mum' friends and a quite meal afterwards, but I felt like everone in the pub would be looking at me and 'Would Know'. In an odd way, I also felt very vulnerable, as if somehow being single again automatically meant people would assume I was some old cougar (i'm 44) looking for a man, or that I'd be constantly having to get away from middle-aged men trying to chat me up. Why on earth I thought this I have no idea, as I don't class myself as particularly attractive, and besides, I never felt afraid of these things when I when out with women friends whilst married.
It's getting better, but it's still hard. Christmas was something to be got through for the sake of my 6 year old, I was glad when it was over. There are still TV programmes that I can't watch, or I cry watching them because they were programmes H & I watched together and used to discuss. I don't mind the supermarket cos I've always done that on my own, but I miss him, even though I hate him too. I miss who he USED to be, what WE used to be, I miss having The One, the special person who loves you, that bond. I miss just laying against him on the sofa, his things lying around, even just his presence when I'm alone in the empty house. I can't imagine any other person taking his place.