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Mumsnet has not checked the qualifications of anyone posting here. If you need help urgently or expert advice, please see our domestic violence webguide and/or relationships webguide. Many Mumsnetters experiencing domestic abuse have found this thread helpful: Listen up, everybody

Original poster

I'm guessing this guy is going to ignore me when I see him out tomorrow nite? Yawn.

47 replies

toptramp · 09/12/2011 22:54

I pulled a hottie last weekend. A younger man. After he left he phoned and told me that he would definately phone me as he is back in town tomorrow and would like to meet up. So far no phone call. Which means he will be in town tomorrow night (as will I as booked a meal with friends ages ago). As he hasn't called as promised I just know he's going to do that classic guy thing of ignoring me.

I just wanted a bit of festive fun. i didn't want a relationship so why did he bother phoning me telling me he was going to phone me? Why aren't people straight up? He even took the trouble to phone me once he'd left my house when he could have just left it. i wouldn't have minded. I will probably see him tomorrow and he will probably ignore me. I like to hav e abit of banter with my former flings but I just know this is how he's going to act!

I am going to look for new talent but why the lies?

OP posts:
Original poster
toptramp · 09/12/2011 23:01

I say yawn as I am genuinely bored of this kind of bullshit.

OP posts:
buzzswellington · 09/12/2011 23:14

Maybe he thought he would want a repeat performance at the time but has changed his mind (for whatever reason) or forgotten.

I hope he doesn't ignore you if you do see each other, but it's his loss, right?

Original poster
toptramp · 09/12/2011 23:19

Of course. I am not wanting a blokey atm anyway.

OP posts:
peeriebear · 09/12/2011 23:19

If you see him, just be friendly and casual. he may yet have a good reason for not calling. :)

Original poster
toptramp · 09/12/2011 23:19

TBH- It wasn't much of a performance. He was just quite buff but hey ho!

OP posts:
Original poster
toptramp · 09/12/2011 23:21

I lost his number thank goodness which means I have a genuine reason but alos means I din't do that neurotic texting thing which has saved my sanity!

OP posts:
Scorps · 09/12/2011 23:22

It is a bit yawn, sometimes, isn't it.

I saw my hot shag friend from a week or so ago today, i wobbled Grin

Maybe yours will call tomorrow? Just be friendly, say Hi, if you see him.

SolidGoldVampireBat · 09/12/2011 23:32

Still absolutely desperate then, OP? You really need to stop dating for the time being, you have posted thread after thread of hysterical whining about man after man and you never seem to be able to chill out and be content in your own company.

RumourOfAHurricane · 10/12/2011 00:13

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn

Mumtabulous · 10/12/2011 00:17

Oooh dear, you are getting a bit of a roasting here OP!

Men and their phone antics, I must admit, are very tiresome.

Original poster
toptramp · 10/12/2011 07:59

No offence solid but fuck right off. If it was you on here boasting about how yoiu had a hot shag we'd all be applauding you on your 'wild' and free anti-monogamy attitude because imo you are very overrated on here.

To be honest I can no longer to be bothered to read your posts. I am not desperate for a man - I am shagging around. I told him I didn't want a boyfriend. I suspect that you are not as shit hot an oracle on relationships as you make out but deep down a very hurt and confused women. please don't reespond to my posts again as I have nothing more to say to you. You have never been supportive or constructive.

You seem to have it sussed when it comes to relationships; mabe you should leave us who aren't so sussed to it instead of dishing out helpful advice. Let me rephrase that; bullying people into takling on board YOUR own attitudes.

You are a bully and I am one of your targets? Why? Because I am not as undesperate and cool as you are at the love game. Like I said- fuck right off.

OP posts:
Original poster
toptramp · 10/12/2011 08:05

And one more thing solid; as you are good mates with your ex and he is totally on board to help with parenting I think you are in a much more secure than a lot of us here who have no such luxury. I think you should move on from stalking me and other hapless relationship types on here and stick to your own kind. If you think I am such a weak and desperate individual then don't interact with me please becaus eI am no longer going to interact with bullies like you.
What is your goal in life; to make sure everyone embraces non-monogamy? Or mabe it's to stamp out desperate women like me? I think you think you are a feminist. Well imo you are definately not on the side of the ladies. Are you sure your not a man?

OP posts:
Original poster
toptramp · 10/12/2011 08:06

Apologies everyone but this is not the first time solid gold has spoken to me like this. She seems to target my posts and talk to me like shit. Well I'm not having it.

OP posts:
Original poster
toptramp · 10/12/2011 08:09

Also- I ma very happy in my own company actually. I just happened to get cornered by a super hot man that night and went with the flow. I am moaning because I am fed up with people in general (not just men) making promises they then don't keep. I get annoyed with my friends when they go faky on me and miss dates etc so why shouldn't be equally annoyed with a man who does the same? It's called courtesy.

OP posts:
CumpyGruntWithJinglyBellsOn · 10/12/2011 08:17

wowsers

Original poster
toptramp · 10/12/2011 08:21

I flew off the handle because I am sick of solid posting about how desperate I am using everything I write as evidence to suggest this.
This is no longer about if that bloke ignores me or not as to be honest I don't really mind either way. It is more about how I would like to be able post about my relationship issues on here without being targeted by solid. It's not much fun but I'm not going to get bullied off.

OP posts:
Leverette · 10/12/2011 08:22

This reply has been deleted

Message deleted by MNHQ. Here's a link to our Talk Guidelines.

Original poster
toptramp · 10/12/2011 08:24

I know. i don't want him anyway. i like someone else.

OP posts:
bubblechristmaspop · 10/12/2011 08:24

Fwiw. I can see why you posted what you did. You will now get less "advice" for standing up to a mn regular.

But good on you.

bushymcbush · 10/12/2011 08:34

Solid's post was very unpleasant and derogatory - and particularly un-feminist in its choice of language - 'desperate' and 'hysterical whining' - totally uncalled for with massively misogynist undertones.

I can see why you reacted like that TT.

toddlerama · 10/12/2011 08:41

Fair enough response from TT. People are allowed to have feelings - that is not desperate.

brandysoakedbitch · 10/12/2011 08:49

I know. i don't want him anyway. i like someone else

This would beg the question, if that is the case then why were you shagging him in the first place: ironic you are slagging off non-monogamy when you seem to be embracing it wholeheartedly. If that really is the case then what's the problem, you have what you want. He changed his mind, he didn't want to call and make an issue of it so avoided it - fair enough

bushymcbush · 10/12/2011 09:01

He changed his mind, he didn't want to call and make an issue of it so avoided it - fair enough

It's not fair enough. It's dishonest. It's so crass and cowardly to say "I'll call you," and then not do it. OP said she would have been happy with the understanding that it was one night - that was what she wanted - but it was him who suggested they meet again and even phoned once. He should've been straight up and honest from the first, not took the cowards way out. Not cool.

bubblechristmaspop · 10/12/2011 09:28

She isn't slagging off non monogamy. She's having a go a certain posters who trample all over threads. Shouting about waily, whiny, desperate women all the time. Whilst boasting and bragging and they happen to diss monogamy lot.

People will have a go at op for that. She's dared question the motives and integrity of a regular poster who is hyped to crap on here.

Someone had to do it. That post was uncalled for, but typical of sgb.

MarinaAzul · 10/12/2011 09:34

The 'regulars' do seem quite powerful on these threads. This short,sharp advice is not always helpful.