Sorry, need more help!

[wobblyknicks]

Sorry, I'm probably boring everyone silly with my problems at the moment but I just need one tiny bit more advice.

Have decided 'trial period' isn't working out and I'm leaving DH. Will go into more detail later, no time now.

Do I leave now while he's in bed, not telling him but avoiding any confrontation? Do I wait and tell him and run the risk of him trying to guilt trip me or getting nasty? There's no-one now who can come over and be there when I tell him so I don't know what to do.

Just some quickie advice would be really welcome!

dadslib - I will post full story later, just trying to get things sorted now. Basically late last night (or very early this morning) he scared me s**tless and although he didn't actually do anything physical it's enough for me to want to go for good. I was thinking about it before because he's been as much of a prat the last 2 weeks as ever but last night just confirmed it.

If I do go, won't be able to post much because mum & dad treat their PC like it will blow up if you spend more than 10mins a week on it but I'll try and get something posted soon after.

Thanks whatsaname, luckily we haven't got too much stuff for dd. The only thing I'd have to go back for is her crib as that's right next to slumbering DH and I think he'd notice if I started taking it apart!

FFS don't worry about mumsnet !!!! Get yourself and DD (?) safe and come back when you are able Very best of luck.

WK i think you have defo decided to go and if thats what you want then you must,dare i say that maybe we should leave you alone for the moment to allow you to get things together and get out of there and you can fill us in later once you are sorted,hope im not offendiing anyone with my suggestion just realising time is obviously of the essence.

loobie - I'm running round packing stuff and just stopping to type occasionally so I'm ok thanks but sorry if I'm rude soon and just stop posting when I'm finished. I'm going to phone my mum just to tell her I'm coming, then at least I won't chicken out and if DH gets up, I've got someone who's expecting me.

nothing constructive to add - just wanted you to know that I am thinking of you and wishing you well.
sis

Where is your money (if you have any?)? Whatever you do make sure that you have access to your money, your passport, and all documentation re your baby. If you have a joint bank account, be aware that he will empty it immediately and that any debts he then incurs on overdraft or credit card will be yours too. Take your share of the money out, and close down any joint credit cards straight away.

Good idea WK hope everything works out for you,i know separating from a partner is never easy,it took me so long to make mines understand that it was over and to get him to leave the house,i couldnt as had 2ds one with SN and was 5 months pregnant,but sometimes i think it would have been easier to be able to just get up and leave him lying there then i wouldn't have had to go through all the grief,which incidentally over a year on i still am.whrere about are you BTW could any of us offer any help to you at any time for whatever reason?

wobblyknicks, good luck whenever you decide to go. I'd go with Now too. Do let us know if you need anything won't you? I mean it we really will try to help. Most libraries have free internet access. Good luck.

blu - separate bank accounts but I have access to his and will split everything 50/50 before I go.

loobie - thanks, I'm in south Cornwall (Truro), don't think there are any Mumsnetters nearby but the net support is fantastic.

Good advice from Blu too, make sure you have birth certs etc.

got all ID for me and dd, a few bills, personal stuff, dd's stuff. Anything else I really need?

Sadly, I'm nowhere near (in Worcestershire), but please contact me via mn if you need anything. I have lots of nursery equipment (moses basket, steriliser etc) that my DD (14mo) has grown out of. I can parcel force stuff to you in 48hours if you need anything, please do just ask. If I have it, I can send it.

WSM
xxx

wobblyknicks, good luck. No, you seem to have it all. Clear the history on your PC though before you go if you don't want him to possibly read this.

If you have a car - insurance etc details. I too have lots of baby (girl) stuff up to the age of two years, please let me know if you need things as am really happy to send.

thanks wsm, should be ok. Don't need to add anything to my life, just take a big problem away!!!

anyone want to bid for an awkward husband, inferior model but will do for spares! Start the bidding at £10, that's all I can afford to pay you!!

www - he knows about mumsnet anyway so no hope there. If he reads this, he reads it

At least you still have a SOH wobbly, keep it, you'll need it .

Sounds pretty much all to me - Blu's advice was really good. Do you have any joint loans, make sure you get professional advice asap reagrding your assets/liabilities.

Good luck WK

Oh, OK! You can always ask tech to delete this thread if you worry that he'll know where you've gone.

Message withdrawn

You seem to have most things you need for the moment now get out of there before he wakes up and never ever look back,always look forward no matter how bad forward looks at times or how good bad could look at times good luck,my heart really goes out to you and your dd,desisions llike these are always so hard even if they are for he best.
Take care
Love Loobie xxx