Onemorechap - Hope you do not mind, was hoping for a bit of advice from you, your previous relationship is very similar to my DHs last relationship
Background - They were together 10years, 1DD and her previous DS.
On the whole it was a very volatile relationship from day one, but he told me she used to with hold sex as punishment/mind games/control, for months, twice even over a year.
Fast forward 4 years from their split, we and him met.
I would not say he was highly sexed, but we it was regular, loving, everything it should have been, neither ever initiated it, we would kiss, as we were very affectionate at time, and one thing led to another ...
We has DD 2 years ago, all through pregnancy we were very very close, always cwtching, when we passed each other would stroke hands, very affectionate, DD so much hard work, we were exhausted for about a year, so naturally sex took a back seat, so did the affection 
Last year we got married, months prior to this I was having doubts, we had not had sex,kiss or cuddled for months.We spoke and got married.
Truthfully, our wedding day was the first time in months we kissed
I know I should have stepped back and cancelled wedding, but so many of our relatives helped financially, I felt at the time I had no choice.
No sex wedding night, spoke about it a few weeks later. Had sex then it tails of again a week or 2 later
This has been going on for about 2 years now, every 4- 5 months, I end up getting stressed, and talk to him about it, he contributes nothing to the discussion [no reason on his side as to how we are here again] though he always agrees with me, we agree to try harder, 2 -3 weeks later, we are back to square one again, and wait another few months until I bring it up again.
We are now close to me wanting to bring it up again, feels like Im banging my head against a brick wall
Think I should add, DH wakes at 4.45 each morning for work, he is home by 4.30pm, plays with the kids, do family things,on internet when they have gone to bed until 9pm, then bed
Also have to add DH is a super husband barr this,he helps with everything, is great with DD and my 2 from previous relationship, is not jealous, not spiteful, disrespectful, dose not raise his voice, he is go with flow sort of person, we never argue, apart from this one thing
I wanted to ask, has your previous relationship affected your views on sex? your relationship with your current partner? and well if it has affected your in anyway?
Any other poster who would like to offer advice I would really appreciate it
Jeez, quite an essay I have typed here, sorry 