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Mumsnet has not checked the qualifications of anyone posting here. If you need help urgently or expert advice, please see our domestic violence webguide and/or relationships webguide. Many Mumsnetters experiencing domestic abuse have found this thread helpful: Listen up, everybody

Original poster

What is with this girl

84 replies

thesunshinesbrightly · 17/07/2011 18:32

When Me and my oh go out she works in the place where we go... she constantly stares,he goes to get a drink she stares at me,we walk back in she stares at me...it's not a dirty look just stares its starting to make me question is she worried i'm going too see her look at my oh? but when i look shes only staring at me and looks straight past him...are they having a affair do you think?? wasnt sure where to post this.

OP posts:
Original poster
thesunshinesbrightly · 17/07/2011 19:17

Eh don't attack me here, i only asked a question.

The reason like i said was, that is the only thing i could come up with.

HairyGrotter - I don't like being stared at simple as that.

OP posts:
madonnawhore · 17/07/2011 19:18

Oh dear. I read that thread. Didn't realise it was the same OP.

Doesn't look like a happy relationship. Maybe this woman knows what a knob your OH is and feels sorry for you OP.

Original poster
thesunshinesbrightly · 17/07/2011 19:18

Thenightsky - No he does not.

OP posts:
Original poster
thesunshinesbrightly · 17/07/2011 19:20

She doesnt even know him. Jezus thanks for your help. Place for advice and i get attacked,how nice.

OP posts:
HairyGrotter · 17/07/2011 19:20

I don't like being stared at, hence why I ask the person who is staring if there is a problem.

It doesn't need to be rude, or lead to violence, it's a simple question that only requires a simple answer.

Fucking weird shit this

LesserOfTwoWeevils · 17/07/2011 19:21

This reply has been deleted

Message deleted by Mumsnet.

thenightsky · 17/07/2011 19:22

By the way OP, did you take the bar job you wanted?

Original poster
thesunshinesbrightly · 17/07/2011 19:24

If you think it's weird you do not have to post.

So i'm a little paranoid. I have been on this forum for years and i thought it was for advice, obviously not.

No thenightsky, i didn't.

OP posts:
HairyGrotter · 17/07/2011 19:27

I'll post where I want ta, you wanted advice, I wanted to ask why you didn't approach and ASK THE WOMAN WHY. Would've saved you having to post on here

Original poster
thesunshinesbrightly · 17/07/2011 19:30

Thanks for your advice Hairy it was great if only i had of thought of that.

OP posts:
madonnawhore · 17/07/2011 19:30

thesunshinesbrightly no one is attacking you. I didn't mean my post to come across as unkind. But the fact is that every single thing you've ever posted about your OH on here points to evidence that he's a massive, massive wanker.

For some reason it's not sinking in. You can't see it, or you don't want to see it. Or you're not ready to deal with the consequences of admitting to yourself that this man is no good for you.

However long it takes for you to come to that realisation, we will be here for you. Keep posting.

But I also have to say that talking about being physically violent to someone who's simply looking at you a lot, is worrying in itself. It's not normal for you to react in that way.

There's obviously lots of unhealthy stuff going on here and I hope you figure it out.

Original poster
thesunshinesbrightly · 17/07/2011 19:36

I WOULD NOT JUST GO UP TO HER AND SMACK HER WITHOUT CAUSE BUT I WILL DEFEND MYSLEF.

OP posts:
garlicbutter · 17/07/2011 19:44

Yikes.

I've read your other posts, sunshine, and I just wondered if she might be thinking whether she could say something to you about your bloke being a tosser?! She sees the pair of you often - it's amazing how much the staff observe in their customers' relationships.

The other two things I thought of were: [a] She fancies you, or [b] You stare at her and she's wondering the same thing Grin

I'm a shocking starer. I don't know I'm doing it, my mind's off doing some programming or trying to remember if I need to get anything from Boots. I do usually stare at pretty women - don't know why, probably just social conditioning or summat. If they smile at me or say "Ahem", I realise and Blush

Can't honestly say a girl would stare at you if she had designs on him. That's just not how it works.

seeitoldyou · 17/07/2011 19:46

thesunshinesbrightly I've just read your other posts and I think you have a lot more serious problems than a young girl in a bar (I guess) staring at you. I am completely new to MN- first post was yesterday so please don't accuse everyone of picking on you without reason. If you are genuinely looking for impartial advice, readers of your threads can only go on what you have posted yourself......and it doesn't paint a rosy picture. I would drop this guy asap before things get out of hand. I think you are looking for problems where there aren't any and are in denial about the very big problem in your life- the man you are dating.

Original poster
thesunshinesbrightly · 17/07/2011 19:50

I don't stare i caught her the once and she looked away now my OH keeps mentioning it and i've caught her doing it alot.

We are nothing but happy when we go out so they could not possibly know what doubts i have.

I thought she was just a starer at the start but it's to often.

I didn't think she would stare at me but i could honestly see no other reason for it.

OP posts:
garlicbutter · 17/07/2011 19:54

Eh, ask her! "Did you realise you keep staring at me? I keep wondering if there's anything you want to say?"

Original poster
thesunshinesbrightly · 17/07/2011 19:54

You obviously have all made up your mind about him and i have made him sound worse than what he is reality.

I thought i could get some advice on why because it was something that was bugging me. I honestly don't know why i thought i could ask.

Don't think i will be back seen as i can't post.. so whats the point.

Sorry for wasting your time.

OP posts:
AnyFucker · 17/07/2011 19:55

sunshine, this girl is trying to weigh up whether she should tell you that your P is a total fuckwit

but then, she fears violence from you, so she is hesitating

oh dear

am starting to think six of one, half a dozen of the other...

seeitoldyou · 17/07/2011 19:57

AnyFucker Wink

madonnawhore · 17/07/2011 19:59

OP you sound aggressive and like you're in denial.

Your OH sounds like a controlling, cheating twat.

Good luck.

Original poster
thesunshinesbrightly · 17/07/2011 20:01

AF - I used to think you was so wise appears i am way off the mark.

She does not know my partner and i am not a violent person at all what i meant was i would stick up for myslef.

OP posts:
AnyFucker · 17/07/2011 20:17

I just posted a long reply to you sunshine, but MN fucking bumped it [angry}

anyway, the shortened version...this guy has you so you don't know your arse from your elbow

believe me, I have been there

I am wise love, to your situation

what a pity you can't see it

I will not post on your threads any more though, as it seems you are unwilling to listen, you will see it as me baiting you and I have no wish to make you feel worse than you already do

however, others as well as myself see the situation here all too clearly Sad

Original poster
thesunshinesbrightly · 17/07/2011 20:29

Last post.

He has finished with me... so least i wont feel the need to post here again.

OP posts:
madonnawhore · 17/07/2011 20:33

Then I think you can consider yourself to have had a lucky escape.

I'm sorry if you feel sad the relationship is over but it's A Good Thing that he is out of your life.

Now you can get a job wherever you want.

AnyFucker · 17/07/2011 20:37

A lucky escape

unless of course, it is more of his twisted manipulation of you

what did he imply that you must do/say/act like so that he might reconsider his position ?

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