DH is more in love with me than ever, but I am falling out of love with him more every day.

[redrollers]

I know I don't want our relationship anymore.
I don't like the person he is, the person he has become. He's very self absorbed, he is very selfish, he earns a lot of money, but doesn't think of that as family money, so does what he wants with it. He's just got a pay rise, but I know if I suggest he puts more money into the joint account, he will moan. So I will continue to worry about money, while he has it coming out of his ears
He irritates the hell out of me, he is becoming more and more physically repulsive to me.
I am putting off sex more and more, and now my body is refusing to respond.
He works away a lot, and works long hours, but he has recently been making more of an effort to be home to see DS.
We are going on holiday for 10 days next week. I am dreading it

I have just helped him through a very stressful period in work, and he keeps calling me his rock.. behind every man etc etc. He seems to have finally realised how good for him I am.

He is very thick skinned and hasn't noticed anything really.

How can I end it, I'm going to break his heart.
And DS, but I know it's not going to work

I think you are right. This is already over. I spent 10 days with dh ( and the children were there aswell, I'm afraid ), over half term, when we went caravaning to Dorset. I had been looking forward to it for ages. I love my husband so much, I just can't get enough of him. And have felt that way for most of the 15 years we've been together.
So I guess that the fact you feel the polar opposite of me, means you know what you have to do. enuff said.

Your right, oblomov, I long to feel that way about someone. To look forward to seeing them,
This takes all the shine off the holiday, I'm so not excited about it, and people would die for this holiday.
Ds will love it, I'll make sure of that.

Is he happy?

Because if neither of you are happy surely it should be the sooner the better for ending it.

And then you'll both have the chance to meet someone else more suited.

I don't think advocating living on benefits is a moral choice. it means we are all paying for your decision and the fact that you have fallen out of love. The welfars state is there to help people who simply cannot support themselves- not people who decide to leave a boring, loveless marriage and can't support themselves. Your Dh earns a lot so if you split he should and would be ordered to pay maintenance for you and the DS.

Strawberryjelly, I'm not advocating going on benefits, I can earn my way, I am just not working right now. And I've paid my tax for the last 25 years and god knows how much dh has paid.
There has to be some support system. There will be women out there who are scared to leave because they have no funds of their own because they are reliant on their men, what about them?
I'll be ok

RR I stand by what I said. If women leave because of violence or other abuse that's one thing- if they leave just because it's mundane or whatever and they fall out of love they should split their joint assets and be supported by the highest earner inthe marriage until they get back ontheir feet fiinancially.

You don't love him anymore and that is absolutely fine.

Leave him, get a divorce and stay amicable for the sake of your son.

No point being miserable. You only get one life :)

redrollers - I'm wishing you joy and luck in your future.

thank you