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Original poster

He asked me for the 34p - tight?

89 replies

GivemeNovocaine · 10/04/2011 21:50

Sorry, have name-changed. Relatively new relationship, we went to the chinese last night and it was kind of pre-arranged that we'd just each buy our own. When we got there the place was really busy so I looked at what mine cost (£3.60) and gave him this amount exactly and told him to just get both to save time. He then counted it up and said "everything on the menu has gone up 30p" and stood there actually wanting the 30p. We'd agreed to buy our own but isn't it going a bit far to actually ask for the extra 30p?!

OP posts:
expatinscotland · 10/04/2011 23:55

Oh, good grief! This is why so many women end up in shite relationships - second-guessing, giving chance after chance when it's already going suzy wong from the get go. 'Oh, maybe he's depressed/Aspie/in debt, etc.' Maybe he's just a cheap mother fucker.

Because to me he doesn't sound Aspie, who cares if he's in debt, he just sounds like a tightwad from hell!

It doesn't sound like you like him much and he's got issues.

Dump and move on.

We're in debt, therefore we don't go out for meals, just have a takeaway on special occassions as a treat.

Which brings me round to the next question, what the hell can you possibly eat in a Chinese that's only £3.60? Ours charges £2 for 8 mini spring rolls and they certainly don't constitute a meal, IMO.

perfumedlife · 10/04/2011 23:56

Don't know Youaretoonice. His parents divorced when he was 16 and he stuck like glue to his mum, who is loop the fecking loop. Maybe it comes from her. She was out shopping with my friend who was buying a vacuum cleaner and told her she mustn't buy it with his money without consulting him! Friend said, it's our money, I work part time and bring up our two kids, whilst battling heart failure. I put 40k into his mortgage, which my name is not on. He refuses to marry me because your divorce put him off marriage so much. Butt the fuck out of my financial business.

They don't see each other now Grin

expatinscotland · 10/04/2011 23:59

'I put 40k into his mortgage, which my name is not on. He refuses to marry me because your divorce put him off marriage so much. '

Sorry, perfumed, but your friend is either majorly deluded or thick to do this. Or she's got £40K to kiss goodbye.

YouaretooniceNOT · 11/04/2011 00:01

perfumed - you make laugh - my gosh - or maybe she knows what he is like!

perfumedlife · 11/04/2011 00:04

Totally agree expat. Had it out with her non stop, pleaded with her to get it all done legit/name on flat. She was depressed at her mums death and drinking too much, lurching from one crisis to the next. I think he saw it as an opening.

She was the top of her game in midwifery, great salary, gave it up to have his kids then he decides she needs to live off her ISAs and he will top her up when it runs out Shock

Bleeding her dry, then will no doubt call ss on her drinking period, and get the kids. Which will finish her. He is a total bastard, and I strongly believe that tight with money goes hand in hand with lots of other nasty character traits.

She won't be told, or at least, she is listening now, when it's no doubt too late.

expatinscotland · 11/04/2011 00:08

'I strongly believe that tight with money goes hand in hand with lots of other nasty character traits.'

Same here.

YouaretooniceNOT · 11/04/2011 00:11

Perfumed and expatinscotland - why do you believe? - that tight goes hand in hand with lots of other nasty character traits?

expatinscotland · 11/04/2011 00:13

It's been my experience is why.

perfumedlife · 11/04/2011 00:16

Because tight, and let's be clear, not careful because you're skint, is saying that my needs/wants/desires will be coming well before yours. I will do everything to make my comfort my priority, and if that means getting you to fund me, or me to shirk treats then so be it.

It says ' I don't care that I look mean, others opinion of me don't count for much, if anything. Their money is not as important to them as mine is to me.

Millions more reasons, just too wound up to rhyme them all off at the min.x

expatinscotland · 11/04/2011 00:17

what perfumed said.

YouaretooniceNOT · 11/04/2011 00:21

Oh Ok thanks perfume x - didn't mean to upset you expat.

scottishmummy · 11/04/2011 00:29

sling him,hes a tight wad and controlling

scottishmummy · 11/04/2011 00:32

tight wad can be indicative of mean spirited bully

that rigid order is a lack of passion and spontaneity and joy

see here the thing i like good value and quality but im not tight.not a profligate spender but hell nae shrouds in a pocket either

K999 · 11/04/2011 00:35

I can't ever imagine asking somebody for 34 pence....I would rather swallow the coins than ask.....Grin

scottishmummy · 11/04/2011 00:39

anyhoo where is this £3.60 Chinese?coatbridge?

Mumcentreplus · 11/04/2011 00:49

run I tell you..run for the hills! he's a right tight-arse

Want2bSupermum · 11/04/2011 00:55

To ask for 34p! If the prices have gone up 30p why is he asking for 34p? Is that his pick up charge?

On a more serious note I would sit down with him and discuss both of your finances. If 34p is a problem then he must have no money and shouldn't be buying take out (even if it is that cheap!).

Want2bSupermum · 11/04/2011 01:02

Forgot to say that if he is not having financial difficulties then I would kick him the curb.

spidookly · 11/04/2011 02:32

I don't get the outrage here. Giving him the exact change for the meal sounds as tight as asking for the extra when the price had gone up.

Why were you do surprised that he accepted your offer to get drinks in? Why make fake offers like that?

You sound just as obsessed with who's paying (preferably not you by the sounds of things) as he is.

I have a very kind and generous friend who is very exact about money in this way. There's not a mean bone in his body, but he's a mathematician - to him £2.73 is not the same as £2 or £3.

perfumedlife · 11/04/2011 02:45

spidookly, you may have a point. Just seen the op's admission of being notoriously tight herself. That puts a whole new spin on it. They're a match made in heaven. Grin

But not sure two tight people want to be together, there will be one more stubborn and determined to spend less than the other. Wars. Over loose change.

diddl · 11/04/2011 09:18

Actually, of course, he should have refused to pay the new prices if they weren´t on the menuGrin

MittzyBittzyTeenyWeeny · 11/04/2011 09:29

'Dump him.

Steal a tenner from his wallet first.'

That really made me chuckle Grin

I went for a coffee with a mate on Friday and we hadn't got the exact money between us and were bickering playfully about insisting the other person payed less.

Get rid... especially if he has a little note pad with lists of things he has lent you or you owe him.....

GentleHotterCrossBuns · 11/04/2011 09:34

He sounds tighter than two coats of paint and it won't just be money. He will have a close eye on how much toothpaste used, Mellow birds coffee and toilet paper rationed to two sheets.

Run.

expatinscotland · 11/04/2011 09:35

'didn't mean to upset you expat.'

No upset taken :)

whitevanwoman · 11/04/2011 10:12

surely if you offered to get the drinks, why would you be offended he said yes Confused

i couldnt live with a pennypincher of any nature :)