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Original poster

Birthday today and no word so far from DP

31 replies

Nogoodatthis · 22/03/2011 11:16

On his birthday we'd only been dating a couple of weeks yet I still managed to remember a and send him a birthday text in the morning, plus I bought him a DVD of a film he mentioned he wanted to see.

It's 11.15am now and I haven't heard anything from him at all. He definitely knows it's today. He can't possibly have forgotten unless he has Alzheimers. I can see him online right now. Am tempted to message him and say 'So have you genuinely forgotten, or do you just not give a shit?'.

OP posts:
Original poster
Nogoodatthis · 22/03/2011 11:22

:(

OP posts:
WishIWasRimaHorton · 22/03/2011 11:25

Sad indeed. unless he is a jehovah's witness?!

that has happened to me before. is not a good sign...

WishIWasRimaHorton · 22/03/2011 11:26

oh and - happy birthday! Wine

Original poster
Nogoodatthis · 22/03/2011 11:29

Should i say something? I'm sat here angry and hurt.

OP posts:
prh47bridge · 22/03/2011 11:51

He may, of course, want you to think that he's forgotten so that the big surprise he has lined up for you later has more impact. I'm not saying it is a good idea for him to do that but some people do that kind of thing.

Speaking as a man, I would also add that many men are terrible about remembering birthdays to the point where you'd think they have Alzheimers. I can remember my wife's but only because it is on an easy date to remember. I could only give the date of birth of one of my four children with any confidence. The other three I'd get the month right but I'd be struggling on the day. The same goes for our wedding anniversary. The only reason I manage to get it right when it matters is that I've got Outlook set up to give me plenty of reminders. Blush

Happy birthday! Wine

Original poster
Nogoodatthis · 22/03/2011 11:55

I said to him the other day half-jokingly 'you're going to forget it aren't you?' and he said 'no, I'll put it into my phone right now'.

I'm not high maintenance at all, but I do like to be made a fuss of on my birthday. That's the only thing I ask pretty much. I'm just so hurt that he didn't text me in the morning to say happy birthday or anything. It's really spoiling my day. I want to email him and tell him how upset I am. But am I just being a baby?

OP posts:
NotActuallyAMum · 22/03/2011 11:57

You're not being a baby at all, I'd be upset too

How long have you known him?

Original poster
Nogoodatthis · 22/03/2011 11:58

6 months

OP posts:
NotActuallyAMum · 22/03/2011 11:58

Prh47bridge has a point too, men are generally useless at remembering dates. I have to remind DH when it's his birthday, let alone anyone else's!

NotActuallyAMum · 22/03/2011 12:00

This early on in the relationship you'd think he'd be on the ball wouldn't you Sad

Do you live together?

If you think it'll make you feel better then I'd e-mail him. Try not to let it spoil your day

Oh and Happy Birthday from me Smile

Original poster
Nogoodatthis · 22/03/2011 12:00

I want to tell him I'm upset but I don't know how to word it without sounding petulant or childish. What should I say to him? Would you get in touch and say you're hurt and upset or would you not say anything and then blast him when he finally gets in touch?

OP posts:
throckenholt · 22/03/2011 12:01

I think you are being a bit precious to be honest. Not everyone values birthdays as much as you - men especially. He has probably genuinely not realised it is today - even if he is vaguely aware it is on this date (IYSWIM).

You don't need to rely on him to enjoy your birthday - if he makes something of it then it is a bonus - but it is YOUR birthday - you enjoy yourself - it is a lovely day - have a picnic, go for a walk - get out and enjoy :)

Happy birthday.

cocorouge · 22/03/2011 12:04

Play it cool today and be nice - see if he mentions your birthday or has arranged a surprise.
If he hasn't delete his number and find a new boyfriend. Wish I'd followed my own advise 10 years ago!

cocorouge · 22/03/2011 12:04

ps Happy Birthday!

NotActuallyAMum · 22/03/2011 12:04

I'd text him "yes I'm having a lovely birthday thank you" then immediately text him again saying I'd sent it to the wrong person

Grin
spidookly · 22/03/2011 12:09

agree with throcken

"I do like to be made a fuss of on my birthday. That's the only thing I ask pretty much."

I don't think that's something you get to ask TBH.

People will make a fuss of your birthday if they feel like it.

Demanding it and getting in a snot if it doesn't happen to your liking is just going to piss them off. And make you miserable because you'll know they're only doing it because you'll strop if they don't.

Original poster
Nogoodatthis · 22/03/2011 12:15

I messaged him and said 'you forgot didn't you?' and he messaged back saying 'it's not the end of the day yet!!' and then 'you're not in work are you?', which I'm not actually (waiting for repairman this morning) but there's no way he could have known that so maybe there's something waiting for me at work...? I dunno.

I hate birthdays. I always get hugely overemotional. Next year I might just ignore it completely.

OP posts:
NotActuallyAMum · 22/03/2011 12:27

Sounds like he could have something planned for later then?

Do let us know

GlynisIsFixed · 22/03/2011 12:30

glynis envisages a huge helium balloon and flowers on Nogood's desk Blush

UC · 22/03/2011 12:33

bet you get into work to find big bouquet of flowers.... then you'll feel really bad!!!!

nickelbabysnatcher · 22/03/2011 12:34

you've sooo got to ring work adn se if something has arrived for you! Shock

redfairy · 22/03/2011 12:34

Text him 'Happy Birthday to me!'

prh47bridge · 23/03/2011 10:19

Did he redeem himself?

Original poster
Nogoodatthis · 23/03/2011 10:23

He did :) Blush

OP posts:
nickelbabyhatcher · 23/03/2011 10:24

well?
what did he do/get you?

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