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NEED TO GUESSTIMATE AGE OF A BABY - wish it was for a pleasant reason, sadly not.............

45 replies

subterfuge · 18/10/2005 16:28

I've tried to work this out myself but am in too much of a state to think clearly.

I have reason to believe my father (in his 70's) may have a child he is trying to keep quiet .

There are nappies at his house for a 22 to 35lb baby - anyone out there able to think more clearly than me and identify the possible age range of the child?

There is no point in asking him about it by the way as he will deny everything. I haven't got time to camp outside his house either.

I've got a few other bits of info and I need to start piecing it all together.

I would very much appreciate help with this. I'm a regular mumsnetter, but can't possibly do this under my usual name.


OP posts:
HRHQoQ · 18/10/2005 16:29

I'd say somewhere between 12-24 months.

mumfor1sttime · 18/10/2005 16:30

My ds is 22lbs and he is 9 months old.

HRHQoQ · 18/10/2005 16:31

yes but the nappy sizes don't really (IME) correspond very well to baby weight.

colditz · 18/10/2005 16:32

Probably a toddler, my son is 2.5 and has been in that size since he was 1.

Does your father live alone? I only ask because mid 70's is the age many men start to suffer with continence, and nappies are cheaper and as effective as Tena.... I am a carer and a lot of people who come to us as respite come with nappies.

charliebat · 18/10/2005 16:32

Do you mean a child himself or a grown up child with children that are now his grandkids?
My dds werent 35lbs till they were about 2-3 years old. Skinny runts!

pjsmum · 18/10/2005 16:32

About 1- 2years i'd reckon

colditz · 18/10/2005 16:32

Is this the only sign on baby activity in the house?

charliebat · 18/10/2005 16:33

I thought that too colditz but couldnt think how to word it!

colditz · 18/10/2005 16:33

I have a strange mind, the nice term is "Thinking outside the box"...

subterfuge · 18/10/2005 16:40

They are definitely not for him.

Oh God, where do I start to explain this?

He lives alone, has done since my mother died.

About 3.5 years ago, I found out that he was having a relationship with someone. Ordinarily, this would have been fine, but the person in question was/is a 20 year old drug addict. She had 3 children, but they live with their father.

My father was giving her a lot of money (he doesn't have much himself), supposedly to pay bills. My sister and I thought we had helped him see how this was a very bad relationship for him to be in, and he promised us about 18 months ago, it was over.

We later discovered he was continuing to see her, and now, have strong suspicions that she may have at some stage had a baby by him.

OP posts:
colditz · 18/10/2005 16:44

I can see why you're worried, definatly.

i will also get lynched for this next comment, but I don't mean it maliciously in any way....

It really is none of your business who he has babies with, unless he is mentally unstable. Likewise who he is sleeping with, or who comes to his house. There is nothing you can do about it if he has had a child with her. He is well within his rights to tell you to get lost.

charliebat · 18/10/2005 16:49

If there is a baby would he really not have said?

subterfuge · 18/10/2005 16:58

No, it's ok colditz, I won't lynch you - it is entirely up to him how he lives his life. I just don't want to be part of it anymore if this is what is going on. I stopped visiting for a while because on one occasion whilst I was there, a brick came through his sitting room window, whilst myself and my 2 year old were in the room. It was this young woman (he saw her running off with a friend, but refused to call the police etc etc).

Perhaps I should have washed my hands of him long ago, but it is hard.

OP posts:
colditz · 18/10/2005 17:00

I see why you want to know now. Do you really think it would be his child, or is it a child she was already carrying?

Nemo666 · 18/10/2005 17:04

my ds is 2 and 26lbs, my friends 9mth old is 24lbs unfortunately that size is probably the broadest age range.

Bozza · 18/10/2005 17:04

It really could be any age from about 9 months (my 8.5 month old nephew weighs 21 lb 10) right through to 3 years. DD is 17 months and she has been in this size for a while. But the sizes do overlap (think next size is 27-50 lbs in Huggies) so would expect DD to be in those probably before she reaches 35 lbs.

Hope your resolve your situation in one way or another.

subterfuge · 18/10/2005 17:06

Knowing my father's history, there's every chance the child could be his.

he neglected to tell my mother about 3 children he had from a previous relationship. She only found out when he was presented with court orders for maintenance of the children.

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laligo · 18/10/2005 17:06

if it's his child, it's your sibling and you might want to get to know him/her? or are things too far gone for that?

expatinscotland · 18/10/2005 17:07

Think instead of beating around the busy I'd be blunt and ask him flat out. If he says, yes, then it's your decision to break off relations w/him.

Poor kids!

subterfuge · 18/10/2005 17:09

I thought the child would be at least 9 months and posts are confirming this.

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helsi · 18/10/2005 17:12

dd is in that size night-time nappy and is nearly 3.

ThomBat · 18/10/2005 17:19

Lottie is nearly 4 and still in smallish nappies, stage 5 or something, we get sent them from a private company so not sure what size they are.

Could they not belong to one of her other kids?

RTKMonherBROOMSTICK · 18/10/2005 17:28

Are there just the nappies or other evidence of babies or children there?

Bottles, dummies, bibs, toys etc

Nightynight · 18/10/2005 18:33

sorry, but I don't understand. why is your dad having a relationship and a baby so terrible? surely your only concern would be if either your dad or the baby's mum were unable (for whatever reason) to take care of your tiny sibling?

subterfuge · 18/10/2005 19:08

Definitely don't belong to the other children, they would be too old.

Nightynight, look in itself, them having a child together isn't a problem - he's an adult, so is she. I don't know whether she is capable of looking after another child - she leaves her dope and other substances (don't know what exactly - little crystals of something wrapped in silver foil) lying around Dad's place - discovered these today too, so I'm worried.

Maybe I shouldn't be and this is all fine.

I don't think he is a particularly "well" person mentally. He tells anyone who will listen that he was once abducted by aliens and now has an extra orifice somewhere as a result of their experiments on him.

Is this all fine? Maybe I'm overreacting?

OP posts:
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