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Mumsnet has not checked the qualifications of anyone posting here. If you need help urgently or expert advice, please see our domestic violence webguide and/or relationships webguide. Many Mumsnetters experiencing domestic abuse have found this thread helpful: Listen up, everybody

Original poster

H pushed me.

26 replies

sadsacks · 21/01/2011 19:42

My mariage is over. hes gone door bolted cant talk in rl, im still shocked.

H and me have not been getting on for a long time. tonight he infront of the 2 kids and whilst holding bubba threw me in to the wall i cut my head on the airing door.

He left the kids up stairs, i ran downstairs to phone police he smashed my phone and home phone.

He pulled my hair got bubba as bubba was crying and gave bubba to me. he said i should shut up or hed hit me hard and one day he will kill me. he then spat at me covering me and the baby in his spit. then he went.

Contacted people to come over, so will be safe. i will report him aswell but i feel sick im not ready to talk yet. i came here as it's anon and i can say 100% what happened without shame. pls don't troll me or Biscuit me. i just want to read in silence does anyone understand?

OP posts:
Original poster
sadsacks · 21/01/2011 19:43

oh he said he was going to tell ss i am a nutter and have my kids taken away :( thank god for the net i can speak to ppl.

OP posts:
Portofino · 21/01/2011 19:45

Please call the police. Now.

CoronaAndLime · 21/01/2011 19:46

Oh sweet heart Sad

You sound in shock.

I think you should dial 999 in case he comes back before your friend/family get there.

merrywidow · 21/01/2011 19:46

I second Portofino. Call police immediately, do not wait

RailwayChild · 21/01/2011 19:46

Please ring the police.

Portofino · 21/01/2011 19:47

Call the police and report that he has assaulted you. It is good that someone is coming over. Women's Aid should be your next call. They will be able to help. There will be plenty of good advice along here in a minute. (((hugs)))))

RailwayChild · 21/01/2011 19:47

Ring them

This will come back to bite you if you don't

he will make claims....deny this etc etc

Ring them
You need their protection

stripeywoollenhat · 21/01/2011 19:47

phone the police now. he has not only assaulted you, he has threatened to kill you. i have no experience of this, but if it was anybody else - random stranger, work colleague, really anybody, you would call the police, wouldn't you? and to be totally cold about it, you need your injuries documented.

glad you have someone coming over. am very sorry this has happened to you and your children.

Original poster
sadsacks · 21/01/2011 19:48

ok i will. ill come back sometime and tell you how i am. im packing basics to go stay with my mum and dad dont know when ill be back on. friend here already thans.

OP posts:
RailwayChild · 21/01/2011 19:49

I know it's scary and you will not want your children to be exposed to the police coming etc but you need to inform them tonight

SlightlyJaded · 21/01/2011 19:49

Well you have done the right thing by contacting people to come over.

Do you know where he has gone and whether he is likely to come back later? Either calmed down and begging forgiveness or even more enraged?

Can whoever is coming over stay for the night?

And yes, absolutely call the police.

And keep posting here all night if it helps

Poor you

slimbo · 21/01/2011 19:51

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

merrywidow · 21/01/2011 19:53

I would stay in your own home. I have been in this situation. You can secure locks by putting keys in the door and turning them.

Again Call police now, they will arrange for you to be seen at hospital and have injuries recorded.

Original poster
sadsacks · 21/01/2011 19:55

Im ok friend is here. going to call for me, packing in a hurry rushing to mum and dads, i hope you understand i may not reply. i want to go now, thank you so much. pls don't worry about me.

im shocked but my friend has made me see sense too. wise ladies. will comeback w/end for q's about money/divorce/legals/say im ok.

OP posts:
D0G · 21/01/2011 19:58

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

Portofino · 21/01/2011 20:57

Best wishes sadsacks. Glad you are safe.

Querelous · 21/01/2011 21:05

Sending you a big hug. You need to report this to the police for your children's sake not just for your own. I know you are in shock and just want to feel safe right now - but please do it and please see a lawyer asap. Good luck to you and your kids.

JustForThisOne · 21/01/2011 21:16

hope your friends in RL made you call the police report it and go to A&E
look after y/s

cestlavielife · 21/01/2011 22:58

you need to report to police NOW today. leave tila few days time and it wont hold much weight...

if not tonight then call them tomorrow to report this.

ths only peson who should be ashamed is him

QueenGigantaurofMnet · 21/01/2011 23:06

Well done you for locking the door and acknowledging that this is the end.

Please do call teh police and report it asap. chances are that they wont come out tonight if H isn't actually there and you are in no immediate danger, but it will be recorded that you have called at the time of the attack.
show them the broken phones.

if you have any cuts or bruises then take a photo of them tonight. preferably before you clean yourself up.

You have said you have someone that can be with you tonight. that is excellent. please try not to be alone for the next couple of days.

On monday you need to get yourself a non molestation order and, if he is on the rent book/mortgage you will need a residency order too. these are simple to get and can be obtained from your local county court. the clerk will explain what you need to put on teh forms. I assure you they are not at all difficult.

It may also be worthwhile speaking to your DC's teachers because if this is something out of the ordinary they are likely to mention it at school.

give them a big cuddle and know that you are doing the right thing.

MadAboutQuavers · 21/01/2011 23:36

What a revolting excuse for a human being he is

Thoughts are with you sadsacks, hope you get some strength at your mums so you can pursue the full weight of the law against him

TimeForACHEEKYWine · 21/01/2011 23:39

He spat at you whilst holding baby????? Shock what a bastard. Where is he do you know? Id ring the police. that is shocking.

is he usually like this? Is he bad tempered or is it a first time?

TheDevilAndTheDeepBlueSea · 21/01/2011 23:44

Fucking hell. You poor woman.

Watch the advice on here, these women know their stuff. I'll be thinking about you tonight, lots of luck.

StuffingGoldBrass · 21/01/2011 23:54

The OP's phones are smashed so she's going to need to get a friend/neighbour to call the police for her.
SO sorry, Sadsacks: be strong, be safe, you can get through this and cut him out of your life.

BertieBotts · 21/01/2011 23:55

You are so so doing the right thing. Stay strong and I hope you get a chance to report this. x

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