hi spacemonkey, i've been thinking it over today, and i'm not sure my experience will be of any use
here goes anyway.
i'm a chartered accountant, and as many of us do, trained in the audit practice of a large firm. while there, i specialised in information systems audit and assurance. a large part of that is reviewing it projects which impact the financials, to ensure that proper controls are in place. for example, you need to understand a project life cycle, the outputs from each phase (e.g. user requirements documentation) and the controls around each phase (user sign-off of the requirements). you also need to have an understanding of standard PM control activities such as status monitoring and reporting, governance, issue and risk management. i've looked at the importance of segregation of environments, proper controlled code promotion procedures etc. i had training in all these aspects at my firm and qualified as a certified information systems auditor.
from there i moved on to a role in another company as a business analyst/pm - turning from gamekeeper to poacher if you like and learning "the hard way" about project management. i've never looked back, it seems to suit me!
i should point out though, i've mainly worked on system integration projects, rather than those with a large degree of bespoke development - i can speak most of the lingo, but am far from being a techie.
what would i advise in your situation?
well, first of all, don't be too hard on yourself. from your comments on this thread, you seem very knowledgeable about many aspects already.
also, as berries says, if you are used to managing a household and family, you already have most of the task management and "influencing" skills necessary!
i would concentrate on getting a good grip on the life cycle as a whole, if you don't already have this.
then i would focus on the areas of:
-planning
-estimation
-issue resolution
-risk management
-influencing/relationships
from what you say, i wouldn't be surprised if you weren't already aware of the importance of these areas, and have a good grasp of them.
in terms of training, there is a course you can do to become a "certified project manager" - i can find out more about this if you like - i'm usually a bit sceptical of credentials like this as they rarely focus on the most important aspect of performance for a pm - delivery.
you can also use the Project Managers' Body of Knowledge - administered by the Project Management Institute. in addition, there's quite a lot of methodology stuff on The Software Engineering Institute . These are the people responsible for the CMM methodology.
i wonder if the above is just a sledgehammer to crack a nut. if you don't mind me saying so, it could be that confidence in your abilities is the issue. if so, i would get a book such as Project Management for Dummies to learn the jargon - and then just go for it. Not any reflection on you - it's the series i always go for when i want things spelled out in plain language...
the absolutely vital "training" that i had was being thrown in at the deep end to just get on with it with only my theoretical knowledge to help.
you are absolutely correct to say that without supportive management, it's very difficult to deliver quality, or indeed anything at all. if i were going to another job in pm, i would ask to interview the project sponsor before accepting the job - you have to be sure they understand their management responsibilities in terms of backing the project. without this backing, it is difficult for even the most accomplished pm to succeed.
i would be interested to know what you mean when you say your current boss has no pm skills? is he "user" management or "it" management? crucial difference, ime.
anyway, long ramble and probably not that much use. hope you are feeling liberated now you have resigned and good luck!