tell me about your great men.

[booyhoo]

i am seeing a lot of threads about men taht aren't so great. men that aren't treating their partners how they should be. i ended my relationship with such a man in august and i really do want to meet a great man, a man who is deserving of what i am. but all these threads are chipping away at any hope that such a man exists. at the minute i find myself saying "thank god i am single" when in actual fact i don't want to be single, not for lack of decent men anyway.

Sorry I didn't mean to disappear :) Thanks AF - I was kidding (mainly) and your posts do make me think so I guess you got something right there :)

Ah, I have started doing a thread about my lovely dh and then changed my mind, yup way too smug.

But sod it, seen as though you're asking booyhoo, and I know you haven't had the best luck with men.

Dh fell for me when I was a toothless junkie living with my mum and trying to scrape myslef together. I was stick thin and battered by life, I had nothing to offer as such - but he says he could see 'potential,' meaning not just the potential of a shag, (he thought I didn't fancy him, I literally had to speak slowly and say 'I fancy you, kiss me you fool) but the potential of the woman I could grow to be. He's an accomplished people reader - my exact opposite. He is very people savvy and tuned in to the vileness of human nature.

It would be fair to say I am quite damaged emotionally, and despite being a bit of a cock in the early days, he has turned out lovely. He loves me, he adores me, he worships me. He stopped working when dd was 9 months old and stayed at home with her as I really wasn't coping, I went back to college with his support and we haven't looked back. He supported me through 2 years of driving lessons and was thrilled when I passed my test.

Of course he helped me get off the drugs, and is currently supporting me through a huge bout of depression / suicidal feelings and helping me deal with all the shit that comes up. Not to mention coping with my Narcissitic loony mother.

I have been a size 6 and up to a size 18 while we have been together, I am an 8 at the moment due to illness and he keeps on looking worried while feeling my arse and asking if I want anything cooking Not that he's a feeder or anything, but he likes some boot-tey on a lay-dey!

Oh and I am bi-sexual and he doesn't mind me having girlfriends. I have had 2 while we ahve been married, just lighthearted and fun, and no he doesn't go all sleazy and ask to 'join in' but I do enjoy telling him, erm details... We are a bit odd I suppose. But when we got married, the registrar got all teary and said it wasn't often they saw a couple so obviously in love (wtf??!) I think because I got upset because I couldn't fill out my fathers details on the forms (I know feck all about him) and dh was all lovely.

He is a lazy sod though and shit at diy.

I'm loving reading this thread. SparkleSoiree, you've really struck a chord with me when you described your dh as a 'very smiley bloke'.

I'd like one of those next so really nice to know they are out there!!

thank you all again. mj i don't mind at all, spread the love .

nemo your story has really touched me. i have been obsessing about getting myself sorted because i couldn't comtemplate meeting anyone while my house is such a tip and my finances are such a mess. aswell as all the hangover from my last relationship. but your post had helped me see that whoever is right for me will be right because they accept me with all my baggage, because that is part of me.

I am so pleased that all is good with you and DH, Bitter, truly

DH is lovely, caring, calm (opposite to me), he balances me out, we just fit so well. After 14 years we've sort of moved from by very different to having lots of similarities but he always encourages my quirks and differences and loves me for them (and I him).

He is also my greatest champion, he constantly tells me how beautiful, sexy, wonderful and capable I am. Which is good, because I doubt myself constantly.

He is also spectacular at cunnilingus.

My DH is fantastic, too many things to mention, he is just my other half and I am his. We work as a team and can conquer the world!

Sadly his brother is an arse. Sorry booy

Cheers Lizzy, I knew he was still in there somewhere.

What a fabulous and much needed thread!! Making me cry today...

My DH is by no means the perfect man but...

When I come home from work he will have picked up DD from the childminder, have done the grocery shopping and, frequently, be bustling around in the kitchen making dinner.

I'm in no way high maintenance, but you've got to love a guy who notices my favourite author's put out a new book and appears with the expensive hardback version the day it's in the shops rather than waiting for the paper back to come out (as I invariably do).

And finally, he is the only guy I've ever felt happy about spending the whole night with, and he has a fabulous bum.

Lovely thread!

My DH definitely has his flaws but I still consider myself very lucky to have him. He works very hard at his business to support us and so that I can be a SAHM and he is also happy to pay for me to study while I'm here and is always so encouraging of me doing things for myself.

As well as all the great practical support he gives us, he is also so funny and intelligent and keeps me interested in him. He also dotes on his son and has been such a supportive father through the horrible sleepless nights, feeding disasters and illnesses.

I honestly don't know how we'd manage without him!

booyhoo - dh jokes that we will have to have an extension built to put all my baggage in! We should love others completely, the best and worst of them.

Dh also loves to shop

And has a pert and perky pair of furry butt cheeks

Does snore though, so not perfect. I may arrange to have his life insured and then have him dealt with if it gets too much.

On the other hand if I told you he was an ex-porn addict with a bumsex fetish and a huge cannabis habit, he may sounds less attractive... But he's still all those other things as well.

@ lizzylou, well that is an important skill

no worries jax, you clearly got the pick of the bunch!

don't mean to make you cry tummy i know you have had a shitty few days. i am using this thread to write my wishlist for my future mr Right.

slug you can't beat a good book or a good bum, getting both with the same man is icing on the cake

squitten they all have their flaws. it is so good to hear of men who consider what will consider what is best for their OHs rather than just think of themselves. i think i need to move to a new area. i don't know any man that i would consider great.

ex-porn addict is the key word there nemo

It's ok - a bit of a weep was required. I'm using this thread to create my wish list too!

Do you ever get scared that something is going to happen and your happiness will be taken away from you, either by some cruel act of fate or betrayal on your DP/DH's part?

Sorry to be a massive downer but (some may already know this from another thread) I have just started seeing a wonderful, wonderful man and I just cannot believe that I deserve to be so happy. I'm convinced it will all go wrong because that's just what happens to me. How do you go through life so confident that everything's ok?

Genuinely want to know and genuinely heart warmed at all the lovely descriptions of lovely guys in this thread. You are all very lucky and long may you continue to be!!

I don't go through life confident that everything will be okay far from it at times! I guess I just try to live for the moment and enjoy things as they happen, because who knows what is around the corner? I do find positive thinking really helps though.

My DH is fab.

He is good looking and physically fit.

He is very emotionally intelligent - and likes to talk about feelings.

But he is quite manly with it too and not wet.

He is brilliant at DIY and practical things.

He is good at sport and mountain biking.

He is clever and we have good chats in the car about ideas and issues.

He looks after DD two days a week on his own (and does almost as good a job as me though the place does always look like a bomb has hit it when I get home because he hasn't quite got my multi tasking skills !

He does the cooking four nights out of three and is good at it.

He bakes cakes because he enjoys it yum

He never sulks and always apologises if he has been unreasonable and upset me.

He is physically affectionate and know what I like in bed

He has agreed to try for another DC because he knows I am mega broody, even though he knows that if it is anything like last time I will be signed off with hyperemesis for three months and he will have to do everything around the house and with DD as well as working.

In fact I'd better text him now show him a bit more appreciation!

My dh is far from perfect, and sometimes drives me up the wall, but he is fab most of the time.

When I was in hospital over the summer, he not only looked after ds on his own, cleaned, visited me twice a day, worked, but went out and bought me lovely clothes I could manage on my own, brought me in Starbucks in a flask to make me smile, and dealt with my mad parents.

Last week, I was away for work, and it was half term - so he had fun with ds, plus did all house things. My colleagues dp got her mum to look after their kids everyday, did no housework, and phoned her to moan everyday

Four nights out of three? Duh, I meant seven of course.

My dh is a hero this week - me and dd2 have been ill with stomach bugs so for the past couple of days dh has been clearing up sick etc, taking dd1 and ds to school feeding/ clothing/ entertaining them. Looking after me and dd2 - let us take over the bed while he slept on the sofa (fitfully with a thin childs duvet), plus dd1 wet her bed and the cat threw up on his desk - so he has been through it - poor love.

Nogood, I don't have absolute blind faith that all will be well

I think that my husband, just as much as other "good men", could be unfaithful (as could I)

I don't let that thought shadow my life though...if he were to make that choice, it woud be his alone

I do however have odd little darknesses...where I think about a terrible accident befalling him or the kids, in a "things can't stay this good" kind of way

I get quite nervous as he drives a lot, and sometimes torture myself with "has he run out of luck today ?"

My best friend found this out by an unexpected knock on the door by a policeman, and it has haunted me ever since.

took me a long time to think it might be ok - in fact I think I've only just started believing it might be (been together 5.5 years, married 4 and have 2yr old DS) to the point where I've tried sabotaging the relationship countless times...tho I till get the fear this is a horrible joke being played on me and will one day turn around with either him dying, being unfaithful or just stopping loving me.

I'm another one who met her DH when at almost rock bottom, though not as far down. I was taking a lot of drugs (snorting lines of coke as soon as I got up just to get through the day, taking ketamine most nights to escape from my own head etc), sinking back into a depression and contemplating suicide again following two attempts but having spent my whole life creating a facade very few people knew how it was for me and nobody knew the true extent...DH saw through all of it and helped me sort my life out in a very ubtle, non-pressured way.

Sometimes he pisses me off beyond belief and he's not one of these men who cooks and cleans and gives me surprise lie ins (he' very lazy) but there is nobody in the world who supports me the way he does. He works really hard to support our small family while I follow my dream of being a theatre director which a yet pays no money at all and means DH often has evenings an weekends on his own with DS, ferries DS to my mum's, will put in lots of hour one week so he can come early the following week to ensure I can get to rehearsals and the theatre. And he runs and organises my theatre company's website and online marketing, builds sets for us and manages nights straight after work just to support me

he recognises before I do when I'm going out of my head being a SAHM and was therefore fine with me buggering off to Spain for 5 days with my best friend last month...and he paid for it

he tells me ALL THE TIME how beautiful, sexy, clever and brilliant I am

he's the best shag EVER....literally I can count on one hand the nunmber of times I've not come since we've been together, he can be very kinky but is utterly selfless in bed and can keep going for hours...bloody brilliant!

My DH is great, I love him even more now than I did when I met him 9 years ago.

Something that I've come to notice over the years is that a lot of partners might claim to love one another but they don't seem to like each other very much. I think the fact that I really really like my DH a lot makes a huge difference to our relationship. He is my best friend and as such I would never put him down (apart from light-hearted moaning or teasing) nor would I listen to others say bad things about him. He definitely feels the same way about me. We just get on hugely well and thoroughly enjoy each other's company.

He is very funny and silly and can always make me laugh
We have great conversations about serious and silly topics.
He has never, in all the time we've been together, said anything bad about me or called me any sort of name
He is very very calm and never loses his temper.
He is always willing to admit when he's wrong and when something bothers me he makes a genuine effort to change. For example when we first met he was a ridiculously picky eater. It caused hassle because it meant we often had to eat separate dinners and it made going out for meals difficult. So, over the years he has painstakingly trained himself to eat a whole heap of new food that he would never have touched before, purely for my benefit. His mother is always shocked at the new things he eats whenever we meet her.

Equally when we first met he was adamant he would never learn to drive. Absolutely adamant. I explained to him that if we were going to have kids together he would have to learn to drive for the sake of practicality. So, our first baby is due on Christmas Day and he is taking his test at the start of December! He might not pass but it's the effort that counts.

He makes me breakfast in bed every Saturday.
He makes me a latte (on the coffee machine he bought me) every day when I come home from work.
He is fantastic at present buying. I might mention something I like in passing in March and it will turn up for my birthday in December! I'll have totally forgotten about it but he always remembers.

He says he loves me at least three times a day, and kisses and hugs me all the time.
He often gets this sort of misty-eyed look and says "I'm so lucky to have you," and he always always comments on how beautiful I am, how well I look, what a good cook I am etc.
He knows it's my (not so secret) dream to be a writer and for years he's been at me to give up work and stay at home just to write, with no guarantee that I'll actually make any money. I've been too scared
When I mentioned I might not go back to work after baby is born he said I should do whatever I want and that he'll support me no matter what.
He's very sexy, very good looking, very cuddly and great in bed :)