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Original poster

Have got myself into something (good) but not sure what to do now

144 replies

AmazingConfusing · 05/11/2010 15:14

Am slightly lurky, well not much of a poster, but anyway have name changed for this.

I've been bursting to tell someone but have sat on it all week and don't know quite what to do now. Last weekend I stayed with some friends of friends, and there was someone there who I'd had a crush on when I was really quite young. We got talking and I found I really, really liked him, and one thing led to another and we spent the night together. Well he went back to his room in the early morning so people wouldn't know.

He is 53 and as far as I could tell, not attached (I did check before doing anything) though he has been married in the past. I thought, well for one night, it won't matter, but he texted me today to say that he is keen to fly up from London tomorrow to see me and wants to leave on Monday morning. He doesn't actually live in Britain so I'm not under any illusions about this but I don't know what to do.

I don't think he can be much of a catch (53 and not ever really settled) for various reasons and I know it's just because I quite liked shagging him Blush and it would be quite convenient as mum has dd for the weekend.

I just feel like a bit of a sad slapper because he was on tv when I was a student and I can't quite believe it and actually am cringing and can't tell anyone I know. I do like him and if it weren't for that then I wouldn't hesitate.

OP posts:
purplepeony · 05/11/2010 22:49

fizz and OP that is a ^terribly* ageist comment and I can only assume you do not know many 53+ yr olds.

men don't stop being able to have sex at 45 or 50 you know.

WTF!

Can't actually believe either of you are so serious. My DH is 56 and would twice a night if i could be bothered.

OP have a lovely time- and don't be blinded by his fame.
And don't be cynical/judgy about why he is alone- maybe he has just not met the right person- yet.

Original poster
AmazingConfusing · 05/11/2010 22:59

Well I hadn't had sex with anyone over 35! I have no idea what to expect but it was great so no agism from me.

And I'm not blinded by fame, I don't think he counts as famous, in fact less famous than Carl Kennedy Grin just someone who I used to fancy and none of my friends did so I guess I was weird. Turns out I was right though

OP posts:
Original poster
AmazingConfusing · 05/11/2010 23:01

I mean right to fancy him and not weird after all

OP posts:
Original poster
AmazingConfusing · 05/11/2010 23:01

Must stop drinking wine Blush

OP posts:
DinahRod · 05/11/2010 23:04

Don't overthink it. Have a nice time Smile

mutable · 05/11/2010 23:06

Heheh- it's Jason Donavan isn;t it?

Original poster
AmazingConfusing · 05/11/2010 23:09

No it is not!

Thanks for good wishes
I am going underwear shopping tomorrow Grin

OP posts:
BaronessBomburst · 05/11/2010 23:22

If you won't tell us who it is, you must at least promise to come back and tell us all about the sex how the date went! Grin

thelunar66 · 05/11/2010 23:35

Oi lady.

53 is NOT old.

Original poster
AmazingConfusing · 06/11/2010 08:19

Woke up very excited Grin
He's arriving at 2 o'clock and we'll meet for a late lunch.

I don't know if I can eat!

OP posts:
Original poster
AmazingConfusing · 06/11/2010 08:22

WIll you all stop thinking his age is a problem? It isn't, I'm 39 myself! I only really mentioned it because he's not seemed to settle down in all that time and that's not the best trait a man can have.
Then I thought about it and thought well he probably thinks the same about me Confused minus 14 years.

OP posts:
purplepeony · 06/11/2010 08:32

My bruv is 46 and unmarried- neverhas. he is the most stable man I know, so don't judge this guy too harshly. I also had an ex who didn't marry until he was 50. I also have another ex who has now had 3 divorces by 55. takes all sorts so don't pre-judge.

HerBeatitude · 06/11/2010 08:55

I actually don't understand what the problem is.

Are you thinking that it would be a waste of time to shag him if a "relayshunship" doesn't result from it?

Because I disagree. He's free, you're free, FGS woman shag him. I wouldn't buy any new underwear though, use the stuff you've got. Would only invest in new underwear if I thought there was going to be plenty of opportunity to use it Grin

Original poster
AmazingConfusing · 06/11/2010 08:58

When I was younger we used to say that if you met a single 35-year-old man there was probably a good reason for it. It's true you do get a lot more open as you get older. I was probably too harsh in my twenties.
I don't really know anything about this man so I have to be prepared for good and bad.

That looks really bad written down doesn't it? Shock At least he is staying in a hotel and he doesn't have my address or anything so if it's really bad for some reason I can chalk it up to experience and get a cab home.

OP posts:
Original poster
AmazingConfusing · 06/11/2010 09:01

No I am just out of my depth. (It's quite nice though!) I've only ever had relationships with people I know, or who are at least known to me (friends of friends), I haven't done anything like this since my early twenties? Or so
I had dd 4 years ago and split up with ex-P soon afterwards (happily though) and it's been a bit of a drought!

OP posts:
loujay · 06/11/2010 09:06

Have a great time, whatever happens will happen, enjoy it!!!

purplepeony · 06/11/2010 10:25

I cannot believe that you thought that anyone over 35 who wasn't married was in some way "odd". I have loads of friends- men and women- who didn't end up with anyone until their 30s or older. Coversely, those who married their first loves at 21 or thereabouts are all now divorced.
And just because this guy isn't married/partnered-up it doesn't mean he has had not had relationships.

You are in danger of overthinking it all. What was he- a minor actor? I hope you have a great time, but if you are looking for more than a quick fling, take care, as that may be all he is after, as you did offer him a one night stand before pretty quickly.

BertieBotts · 06/11/2010 10:31

Maybe not being married by the age of 53 is a good sign - maybe he just has very high standards Wink (which is no bad thing for you) Grin

purplepeony · 06/11/2010 10:55

OP I have re read my post and hope it doesn't sound harsh.
I think what I was trying to say is that you are getting yourself all worked up over this guy on the basis that he was an actor or whatever. he though- and you have to accept this- may simply be at a loose end and fancy spending some time with you. in bed.
I just don't want you to get hurt, that's all, as it obviously means a lot to you and you are taking it all to heart a bit.

HappyWithLife · 06/11/2010 11:31

It's Curly Watts isn't it?

simonedeboudoir · 06/11/2010 12:10

Amazing I hope you have a fantastic time, just go with the flow and try not to think too much about things at this early stage.

It's never Dolph Lundgren.

Is it?

HappyWithLife · 06/11/2010 12:34

PurplePeony...a single 46 year old brother eh......? Wink

Gettingagrip · 06/11/2010 12:37

LOL Happy....that's just what I thought!

simonedeboudoir · 06/11/2010 13:02

Oh wow an hour to go how exciting

Original poster
AmazingConfusing · 06/11/2010 15:25

In loo on iPhone
SO glad I did this!

OP posts: