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Relationships

Mumsnet has not checked the qualifications of anyone posting here. If you need help urgently or expert advice, please see our domestic violence webguide and/or relationships webguide. Many Mumsnetters experiencing domestic abuse have found this thread helpful: Listen up, everybody

Dh still loves ow - any hope for us?

72 replies

Ineedabreak · 25/10/2010 08:52

My dh recently admitted to having an affair with a colleague. We have been together 20 years & have 3 children under 8. He said he has been seeing her for 5 months and was friends with her before this. After a row he told me about her. We are still together and I don't want my marriage to end because I love him. I can see there were some problems in our relationship in that it had become a bit mundane and we had drifted a bit. Since I found out & we agreed to try again - 3 weeks ago - things have been good. Sex has been great & we have been much closer & talking. However he says he still loves her and that he feels something for her he has never felt before. He says he is not seeing her anymore so we can try & make a go of our marriage. He is a great dad to the kids. Is there any hope for us, will his feeling for her fade?

OP posts:
Kenickie · 07/11/2010 09:00

It was 6 months until my husband would go for counselling. I know that doesn't help you much, as 6 months is just too long to wait. But I wish in hindsight that I had got some counselling for myself, because now, although my relationship is getting better, I am still not myself and really wish I had put me first in the early days. Have you thought about counselling for yourself? You are so much more important to take care of.

umma · 07/11/2010 09:04

I'm sorry your husband is putting you through this.

I've been there, mine did exactly the same thing to me.

It was hell and mentally/emotionally I hit rock bottom....and eventually I thought I CAN NOT LIVE LIKE THIS. I told him to go last year, 2 months later they move in and are still together. I look back now and although it was so, so painful I absolutely know that I made the right decision.

Because I couldn't live my life like that, it was like half living, if you know what I mean.

Think about you and what you want. xxxxxxx

umma · 07/11/2010 09:05

and also you have to think can YOU ever really be happy now, after all this.

Sorry if this looks negative, I hope you sort things out i really do xxxx

Faaamily · 07/11/2010 09:08

I think it's an incredibly shitty thing to do, to be sleeping with you and telling you he wants to make a go of your marriage on one hand, but to be saying he still loves the OW on the other.

I would ask him to leave, seek counselling and come back when he is ready to fully commit to the marriage.

TechLovingDad · 07/11/2010 09:09

This sounds horrible for you. Yes, you, not him.

He is having his cake and eating it. Still seeing her is showing you no respect, at all. No wonder he won't go to counselling, he'd have to confront and admit to the hurt he is causing.

You may not want to be a single parent, but just because you split doesn't mean he can't be just as involved with your DCs.

I wouldn't be surprised if he's waiting for you to get worn down and end it, so that he can tell OW "she chucked me out, we can be together now".

I feel for you, because he is treating you in a manner that I bet he wouldn't put up with himself.

umma · 07/11/2010 09:17

Techlovingdad...I think that is what my ex husband did to me...worn me down so in the end it was me who said enough is enough and you know what, that was when I lost ALL respect for him...not for having the affair itself.

So very good point!!

Teaandcakeplease · 07/11/2010 09:19

It can take time for feelings to fade from an affair but in order for you two to save your marriage, he needs to end the affair. My H sat on the fence and couldn't make a decision between us. I found it terribly hard and in the end after months and months of wanting to save our marriage and his lies, I gave up and filed for divorce. In hindisght everything is clearer. Now the dust has settled, I am glad I made the decision for him. However I had to be sure first I'd done everything I could to try and save our marriage, after 6 months of waiting and hoping, I felt that was enough time. He's still with her of course.

Lizzabadger · 07/11/2010 09:19

This must be pure torture for you. Please kick him out. Being passive and letting him call all the shots is not going to help in any way.

abedelia · 07/11/2010 09:47

OP, I know you'll be reading this and thinking 'well, it's easy for them to say' but really - some of us have been there.

You also have to face up to something uncomfortable now - and that's that at present, you don't have a marriage to lose. Please don't beat yourself up any more about how the marriage was 'stale', also - chances are that this ambivalence just before everything went wrong was because as he grew closer to her, he was withdrawing from what was basically a happy relationship so he could justify giving in to his attraction to her. You could have done nothing because it wasn't about you.

WhenwillIfeelnormal · 07/11/2010 10:20

Sadly, I am not surprised it has gone like this, OP. I expect you have been spending the last few weeks jumping through every imaginable hoop trying to compete - and losing so much of yourself in the process.

As I said upthread, I suspect this is a different type of affair to the ones we often come across on this board, where there is an addiction to the feelings and not the person.

Affairs that are borne out of a proper deep friendship, often involve genuine feelings.

What never changes though, is that this is all about him and not you. If you looked at that other thread I directed you to, you will also see that, like Abedelia wisely points out, betrayed partners often set the clock too late, when trying to identify when the marriage became "stale". So often, that only started to happen after a spouse has detached from you - and often because of another person in the marriage.

You trusted him that he had ended this relationship, but as you were asking no questions and weren't verifying what you were being told, you have perhaps assumed that if you could meet his every need, this would ensure his detachment from the OW. This just never works. Competing never does work, whereas taking control and asserting your rights has the twin benefit of retaining your self-respect and increasing the respect in which you are held by your H.

I sincerely hope you will see now that the respondents upthread were right, all those weeks ago.

It is hard enough coping with ambivalance after the extra-marital relationship is over, but it is impossible to stay in a marriage while the affair continues.

I agree with others in that I suspect your H is manipulating the situation so that you can look the bad guy who kicked him out. Kick him out now by all means, but don't let him manipulate you or anyone else in your life. Tell everyone calmly and clearly that you weren't prepared to stay in a relationship that was no longer exclusive. Put the responsibility for this where it lies.

castille · 07/11/2010 10:24

OP I have no advice to give but I just wanted to say that you are not alone - I am in a similar situation after my H admitted to a long affair nearly 2 months ago.

I have received fantastic advice and support from some wonderful MNers. I am very grateful for their voices of sense and reason during the most painful weeks of my life. Listen to them before deciding what you can live with both in the short and long term.

Be strong and calm x

almostgrownup · 07/11/2010 10:57

So sorry for your pain, Ineedabreak.

I was in the same situation as onandup, who posted earlier, ie falling in love with someone who started as a friend, and early on told my dh. I expected to be shown the door. Instead dh took a radical approach. He gave me permission to see OM as often as I wanted. It induced terrible guilt in me. And the very strong emotional feelings for OM did eventually fade entirely - took about two years altogether. So it is possible, but very hard. Admire dh more than any other person I know.

tadpoles · 07/11/2010 17:07

almostgrownup - your husband's reponse interests me in that he did the opposite of what people might expect. On the other hand, you also told him which again is not the norm in affairs. It also slightly supports my view that men respond to their partner's affairs very, very differently to women.

I think both myself and my partner would take this kind of approach because we both value our relationship too much to let it go - even if other people came into it at some stage or another. They would never have the shared history that we have, or be the parents of our children, so they could never really compete. I think that the infatuation stage of a relationship tends to fade after a year or two so if couples can ride the storm of an emotional or physical affair then the prospects in the long term can be quite good.

Also, statistically, not that many affairs end up as long term relationships. I suppose it depends on how much the primary relationship is worth saving. If it was fundamentally quite flawed then an affair can be the final straw, but if it is good in other respects then the affair might just be the wake-up call to save the marriage from complacency.

Anyway, good luck OP - perhaps if you get some counselling for yourself you can move into a space where your emotions are not so bound up with your partner and you can make decisions about what YOU want.

matthew2002smum · 08/11/2010 01:23

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

abedelia · 08/11/2010 10:01

OP - how are you?

Ineedabreak · 08/11/2010 15:14

Thanks everyone for your posts. I am ok and feeling a bit more positive today. I know that what everyone is saying makes perfect sense but at the moment I don't think I can leave for lots of reasons. If we do split up I want to be sure that I did all that I could to make things work. I also don't want to disrupt the kids anymore than I have to. Also money is really tight - I could not afford to rent anywhere and don't know anyone with room to put us up. There is very little accommodation available as we live in a rural area & kids go to village school so need to stay close. I have spoken to dh - he says he has not slept with her since we agreed to try again but they have met up to talk at work. He says he does not want to end our marriage but feels really confused and low. He says he knows that he has to sort things out. I have told him that I cannot accept him seeing her and if he continues I will leave him. So I am now back to waiting & watching.........

OP posts:
WhenwillIfeelnormal · 08/11/2010 15:33

Unfortunately then, since you've told us you won't leave, you've made a threat that you won't carry out and he probably knows it.

Why would it be you leaving the family home, anyway? Why wouldn't it be him leaving?

tadpoles · 08/11/2010 16:27

I am not sure you can "make" someone leave their home unless they are behaving in a way that is unlawful - for instance in a threatening manner etc. Obviously, infidelity can be grounds for divorce but again that is up to the people involved - I assume that even if someone files for divorce because of infidelity they are not within their legal rights to throw the unfaithful party out of the house before any divorce or legal separation has taken place?

If the OP's husband if no longer having a physical affair with the OW then it really is up to the OP how she decides to respond. You also cannot "force" anyone not to speak to someone else - it simply is not possible.

Given the circumstances OP could you at least set up separate living arrangements within your home so that in effect you have instigated your own little "trial separation" or whatever? Maybe even get a bit of advice on your rights. That way you can regain some control without having to turn your life even more upside down.

While your partner sorts his head out you can make it clear that he is presently only entitled to a co-parenting arrangement with you and that means no shared sleeping arrangments and you get on with your life while he wallows in self pity. And while he is at it, you can go out and have some fun while he babysits!

Ineedabreak · 08/11/2010 16:46

Tadpoles you are right he would not leave and I could not make him. I think by letting some time pass things may be clearer for all. I don't think that I have made a threat that I would not carry out - if I get to the stage where I am convinced there is no future in the relationship - if I find out he is sleeping with her or if he continues to meet up for chats - then I will end our marriage and we would have to sell the house & move. At the moment though I still think that there is some hope if we can survive the next few weeks / months.

OP posts:
AnyFucker · 08/11/2010 16:50

has he said he will now stop ^ contact with her ?

how is he going to prove that to you, if these meetings happen at work ?

Ineedabreak · 08/11/2010 16:56

He said he knows he has to sort things out and will do so - I think he cannot stop seeing her altogether because they work together but he needs to stop the emotional involvement which I guess is really hard to do. I know he has to prove himself and I have to retain some self respect but at the same time I do not want to rush into things now that I might later regret.

OP posts:
nancydrewrocked · 08/11/2010 17:15

being blunt here but you are allowing him to have his cake and eat it.

He has told you he loves the OW, he has told you he is still seeing her...of course therefore they are still having sex and he is still telling her he loves her.

And he is certainly not going to leave when despite having told you this you are still telling him that you want to work things out and are having sex with him yourself.

At the moment you are giving him absolutely no reason to behave differently.

Either leave yourself (and I don't think you should be the one to physically leave) or at the very least make it clear that this state of affairs is unacceptable, stop having sex with him, stop cooking and cleaning for him and make him take some responsibility.

FakePlasticTrees · 08/11/2010 18:17

well, if you can't afford to move out, have you tried telling him he has to leave? At least for a short while (actually, once he's gone for a few days, you could get your head straight and decide what you want to do next - you could not let him come back)If he won't, you can tell him he's at least not welcome in the same bed as you while he's still sharing hers.

And have you asked him if he's exposed you to STD risks? If he's been sleeping with her and not using condoms, you need to get yourself checked. (sorry for being a bit grim, but you need to think about these things)

This isn't about winning and losing, this is about how you want to live the next 30/40 years of your life. Show him you dont mind if he has an affair as long as he comes home afterwards, then when this one ends, he'll have another. He needs to learn he can't have everything, it's you (and the kids) or her. Don't let him have both.

FakePlasticTrees · 08/11/2010 18:18

oh, and while he can't stop seeing her in a work environment, I'd make it a condition of letting back in the house that his CV was updated and out to recruitment agencies - it may take time to get a new job, but he has to start looking at least.

amothersplaceisinthewrong · 08/11/2010 18:27

I would definitely ask HIM to leave for a while. He is married to you, he should not be carrying on with another woman. ANd you should not be making excuses for him doing so.

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